Thursday, October 31, 2013

10.31.13 Bee-otch of the Day: Republicans


Bee-otch of the Day honors are awarded Monday through Thursday, Bee-otch of the Week is awarded Friday on Chuck69.com.



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Name: The Republican Party
Age: 158
Occupation: right-winged retards
Last Seen: Washington, DC
Bee-otched For: spinning Obamacare out of control


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Since it debuted a few weeks ago, people have been bitching about how the Affordable Care Act is one flawed system. The website where people can get their coverage keeps crashing and now, some folks are pissed that their coverage was taken away from them all because their former coverage no longer meets healthcare standards.

Because of this, the GOP has been grilling those in Obama's cabinet about the changes in healthcare nonstop. They're crying that the system's flawed and that we need to go back to the old system. In other words, go back to a system that has screwed millions of Americans all in the name of profit.

First off, those insurance policies that were taken away from those who liked them? They were scams, plain and simple. They were designed so if you were sick, you were screwed. I don't totally buy into the "people having to pay more than $600 in premiums" bullshit, either. NBC News did that investigation, and since I watch NBC all the time, guess who sponsors their newscasts? The organization that promotes fracking (you know, the ones that show an old woman talking about shale?) and a dorky little girl talking about how Quilted Northern "makes your heiny happy" and giggles.

NBC News, and probably every other newscast in America: brought to you by the Koch Brothers.

Look, I'm no idiot. I saw the movie Sicko and love him or hate him, Michael Moore's on the mark. America had one of the worst healthcare systems in the world thanks to the Republicans. Thankfully, Obama *did* make things a little better by forcing insurance companies to toss out the pre-existing condition clause. We still have those darned insurance companies, but they now have to act a little more responsible.

All I can say is this: don't believe the hype. If you want to listen to the media bitch about Obama, that's your problem. I just wish that this country took things one step further and made a government-run healthcare system a reality, plus higher taxes for the wealthy. It's time to give power back to the people.

Nonetheless, this is nothing more than the wealthy's way of making you vote Republican next year.

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Got a Bee-otch to nominate? E-mail us @ chuck69dotcom@gmail.com. All suggestions (except for me) are welcome!

Bee-otch of the Day Archives can be seen on http://beeotchoftheday.blogspot.com!

Bee-otch of the Day is a production of Chuck69.com, Grand Rapids' site for Stern, politics and more!

Wednesday, October 30, 2013

10.30.13 Bee-otch of the Day: the people of Roseville, MI


Bee-otch of the Day honors are awarded Monday through Thursday, Bee-otch of the Week is awarded Friday on Chuck69.com.



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Name: Roseville, MI
Age: 87
Occupation: Detroit suburb
Last Seen: Macomb County, MI
Bee-otched For: not getting a joke


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Today is the day before Halloween, where traditionally, people would torch peoples' houses, TP trees and egg various properties.

True, Devil's Night is a pipe dream of the past for the city of Detroit, there's something else the area is not totally happy about: white trash.

Yes, Detroit has a lot of white trash. I remember going down 8 Mile a few years ago to visit a seafood place that my now-late great aunt suggested, and the whole area was white trash. The restaurant - which was run down and painted purple to match the neighboring strip clubs - even had the local country music station, 99.5 WYCD on their boom box.

While people associate The Motor City with blacks and poverty, they're forgetting that whites still live there, too, and they're playing a role in the city's demise. In the case of nearby Roseville - a former hometown of Kid Rock - being white trash is a way of life.

Residents in the city are angry at a mother and her elementary school-aged daughter for wearing white sacks marked with the words "white trash" during a school Halloween party. Many feel that the costumes were offensive towards those who are white trash, i.e. live in trailers, live on government assistance and so on. One defending the mother and daughter said that we can't have guns, we can't have gore or blood, but we can have this.

You know, my suggestion is this: if you're offended by being called "white trash", DON'T BE WHITE TRASH! BETTER YOURSELVES! You see, I grew up in northern Michigan, and since my father was a bus driver, he had all sorts of kids on his big yellow cheesewagon. There was a family whose parents barely worked and lived in a nice, big house in the country because their grandparents paid for everything. However, the other kids weren't as lucky. We had some who lived in trailers and others who lived in junkyards filled with old, broken-down automobiles. I swear, the kids who lived in those houses smelled like piss everyday. My ex-stepbrother and sister even lived in a trailer with their mother, who didn't work because of her constant boozing and *groan* sadly, I dated a piece of white trash who lived in a trailer and had another trailer in her backyard.

I know, not everybody can have a good job and good pay, so in the trailer they live. I know some people shake their heads at the fact that I live in an apartment. So? I'd rather live in the city and pay rent than to live in a trailer where the water smells funky and everything is small, like the bathrooms. But, if you get teased by living in a nasty old trailer, yet, you're fat and have four teeth, well, there you go.

White trash: you not born that way, it's a decision you make.

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Got a Bee-otch to nominate? E-mail us @ chuck69dotcom@gmail.com. All suggestions (except for me) are welcome!

Bee-otch of the Day Archives can be seen on http://beeotchoftheday.blogspot.com!

Bee-otch of the Day is a production of Chuck69.com, Grand Rapids' site for Stern, politics and more!

Tuesday, October 29, 2013

10.29.13 Hero of the Day: Marcia Wallace


Bee-otch of the Day honors are awarded Monday through Thursday, Bee-otch of the Week is awarded Friday on Chuck69.com.



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A SPECIAL HERO OF THE DAY!


Name: Marcia Wallace
Age: was 70
Occupation: actress
Last Seen: being God's receptionist
Awarded For: being a part of the greatest sitcom, ever

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The voice of one of the greatest schoolteachers on TV* has been silenced for good.

And yes, the asterisk is there for a reason.

Marcia Wallace was known to many as Carol Kester, the receptionist to Bob Newhart on his signature 1970's TV series. However, in her later years, she was the chain-smoking, ignorant schoolteacher to Bart Simpson, Edna Krabappel on The Simpsons.

The daughter of a store owner from Iowa, Wallace was once overweight, weighing 230 lbs. However, she lost 100 lbs. in the late 60's, which made her more visible to producers. She was on Newhart from 1972-78, multiple game shows such as Match Game, Hollywood Squares, Password and others, and yes, The Simpsons.

A few weeks ago, the show's producers released a statement that one of the show's characters would be killed off at the end of the season. With the passing of Wallace, the producers did say that Ms. Krabappel will be retired. There's speculation that Wallace had been ill for some time because of the announcement, although no official word had been released as to why Wallace died.

Nonetheless, as a life-long Simpsons fan, I'm saddened over Marcia Wallace's death. I hope that her friends and family are feeling comfort throughout their tough time and know that millions of people are mourning with them.

Let's hope she's not forcing God to write some stupid phrase on a chalkboard a hundred times.


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Got a Bee-otch to nominate? E-mail us @ chuck69dotcom@gmail.com. All suggestions (except for me) are welcome!

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Monday, October 28, 2013

10.28.13 PODCAST



CHECK OUT OUR  PODCAST!
This week's topics:
*my f'n cold,
*my new phone and phone company (and how you can save a ton of dough with them),
*the death of 1310 in Detroit and progressive talk radio
*the cool app of the week!

10.28.13 Hero of the Day: Lou Reed


Bee-otch of the Day honors are awarded Monday through Thursday, Bee-otch of the Week is awarded Friday on Chuck69.com.



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A SPECIAL HERO OF THE DAY!



Name: Lou Reed
Age: was 71
Occupation: singer/songwriter
Last Seen: taking a walk on the wild side
Awarded For: being a true influence on rock music, period.

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Wow. Two heroes named Lou in two weeks.

One was Lou Scheimer, the animation producer who despite his animated shortcomings gave us some of the most-influential works of cartoons ever made. Plus, in the age of Reaganomics and outsourcing, gave hundreds of young American animators work.

Now, it's Lou Reed's turn. Like Scheimer, Reed was Jewish, worked for several bigger groups before going on his own (Scheimer worked for Walter Lantz and even Warner Bros. prior to Filmation's founding) and both stood for gay rights. However, Reed was himself bisexual (Scheimer was straight, though his daughter, Erika is gay), even receiving shock therapy as a teen.

But it was association with The Velvet Underground in the mid-60's that made Lou Reed a star. Its lead singer and guitarist, many felt that his style of sound helped pave the way for punk rock and alternative. Many a musical historian even called Lou and the Velvet Underground the first-ever alternative group. Several radio stations that have classic alternative shows - like Detroit's 89X - plays the Underground on an occasional basis.

When The Velvet Underground and Nico was recorded in 1966, fellow groups like The Beatles were also experimenting in new sounds. Some would say that the psychedelic sounds of both bands started to mesh with each other at the same time, further making rock more sophisticated and less top 40-friendly. Although TVU&N had two singles, it only peaked at #171 on the album charts. Still, it was one of the most-important albums of all time.

However, Lou Reed left the Underground in 1970. He released a self-titled album a year later of mostly re-recorded VU material, but in 1972, he hit pay dirt with Transformer, co-produced by David Bowie and containing the hit "Walk on the Wild Side", Reed's only top 40 hit. The album also contained other notable tracks such as "Satellite of Love" and the song I have posted above, "Perfect Day".

In all, Reed recorded 22 albums. However, his only gold album was 1989's New York. Its lead-off single, "Dirty Blvd." was a #1 hit on the alternative charts.

Reed's last album was 2011's Lulu, a concept album that was recorded with Metallica. The album was a disappointment, critically and sales-wise.

In 2008, he married art rocker Laurie Anderson, best-known for her 1981 hit "O Superman". Reed received a liver transplant earlier this year, but passed away on Sunday at the age of 71. He is survived by Anderson and the thousands of singers and songwriters he helped influence over the years.

Thanks, Lou, for helping us walk on the wild side with you.

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Got a Bee-otch to nominate? E-mail us @ chuck69dotcom@gmail.com. All suggestions (except for me) are welcome!

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Bee-otch of the Day is a production of Chuck69.com, Grand Rapids' site for Stern, politics and more!

Thursday, October 24, 2013

A public letter to a teen that *almost* got the Bee-otch of the Day


Bee-otch of the Day honors are awarded Monday through Thursday, Bee-otch of the Week is awarded Friday on Chuck69.com.



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Yesterday, I did not publish a Bee-otch of the Day. The reason why was because I bashed a man who sent me a poorly-written cease-and-desist order to remove several blogs of mine that bashed his brother for killing an innocent teenage girl in 2011. Well, come to find out, the person I was bashing.... is just a teenager.

The story goes like this: last Wednesday, I didn't publish a BOTD because I was too busy getting acquainted with my new cell phone. When I went to bed that night, I checked my phone for e-mails and got one from somebody with bad grammar telling me that if I didn't remove these blogs until 7:00 (he didn't specify AM or PM), he would press charges. Not to mention, his dad was a cop. So, I adhered to his wishes and did so.

Needless to say, I was pissed, and decided to crown him Bee-otch of the Day for Wednesday. I could have done it sooner, but with Lou Scheimer dying and Jim Leyland retiring, I crowned them Heroes for Monday and Tuesday respectively. I went ahead and gave the punk BOTD for Wednesday, and after the fact, I did some fact-checking. Come to find out, the picture of him that came with the hate-filled e-mail was that of him back in 2008. He looked like he was only seven years old.

Therefore, instead of reaming him a new one, I've decided to write an open letter to this person.

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Walker,

Last week, you wrote me a letter telling me to remove a post I made about your brother, who is now serving a 40-year jail sentence for killing a teenage girl. I actually had two, so I removed both.

Your brother's trial was all over the news here in Michigan. It was a sad story not just for the girl's family, but for your family as well. I would never make assumptions about certain individuals because yes, that's slander, and it's illegal. All I did was talk about what the local media up north - The Record-Eagle, 7&4, 9&10, etc. - were talking about. My feeling is that if you wanted to go after me, you'd have to go after them, too.

Point is, I looked at your picture on the side of the Gmail that I got, and judging by the fact that it was taken in 2008, you should be a young teenager by now. I know what it's like to be a teenager, I was one once. I had a tough teenage life, too: my parents divorced when I was 12 and I didn't always agree with them all throughout my teenage years. But guess what? I survived. Your biggest challenge, I think is realizing that your big brother is in jail until the age when most people are thinking about retirement. He made a giant mistake that I think he'll be regretting for the rest of his life. The bad news is that his life is wasted. The good news? Yours isn't.

I hope what your brother did to young Carly teaches you a lesson. Don't be like him. Do good in school. Have goals in life. Try to be a model to others. Realize that you're not perfect. I'm not perfect. Your dad's not perfect. NOBODY IS. We all have our faults in life, and when we make one, fix it the best you can. If you can't, find a friend who can.

I will admit, yesterday morning, I prayed for you and your family. I hope God's arms are helping your family and will continue to do so throughout the years. Robert couldn't fix the past, but I hope he can find the positive in the future.

God bless,
-C.


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Got a Bee-otch to nominate? E-mail us @ chuck69dotcom@gmail.com. All suggestions (except for me) are welcome!

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Bee-otch of the Day is a production of Chuck69.com, Grand Rapids' site for Stern, politics and more!

Tuesday, October 22, 2013

10.22.13 Hero of the Day: Jim Leyland


Bee-otch of the Day honors are awarded Monday through Thursday, Bee-otch of the Week is awarded Friday on Chuck69.com.



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A SPECIAL HERO OF THE DAY!



Name: Jim Leyland
Age: 68
Occupation: former baseball manager
Last Seen: Detroit
Awarded For: making the Tigers a likeable team again


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The Detroit Tigers of ten years ago was one to forget.

Under the aegis of Alan Trammell, the team tied the 1962 New York Mets for having the worst record in baseball: 43-119. The team was losing fans and even radio affiliates; here in Grand Rapids, they ended up on brokered R&B station WMFN 640, whose operator angered fans by pre-empting Sunday games for gospel music.

Hard to believe it, just a few years later, the Tigers were roaring again, thanks to Jim Leyland.

Leyland made baseball history by being the first manager ever to lead his team - the Florida Marlins - to a World Series win only to become the worst team in baseball the year after. Then again, it wasn't totally his fault; team owner Wayne Huizenga traded off the whole team in 1998. After years in semi-retirement, the Tigers gave him a chance in 2006. The gamble was worth it.

With Leyland, the team had winning records every year. He won over 700 games with the Tigers and 1,769 as a manager, making him the 15th-winningist-manager in all of baseball. The team even made it to the World Series twice, only losing to the Cardinals and the Giants.

This was yet another winning year for the Tigers, who won the AL Central with a champagne shower and Leyland talking to a reporter with tears and snot running down his nose. Even though the team won the ALDS against Oakland, they lost the AL title to the Red Sox. True, the Sox deserve it after their horrific bombing a few months ago, but Detroit is sad and bankrupt. A World Series win for the Tigers would have renewed some trust in the ailing Motor City.

It would have been cool for Leyland to retire on top, but now, it won't happen. As seen in the ALCS, the Tigers lost a lot of steam. Many criticized him for not allowing multi-run homers by having his better batters follow up with worse ones. He would retire a good pitcher like Max Sherzer or Justin Verlander and replace him with one of their crappy bullpen ones.

But, it's time to move on. Leyland is 68, burned out and already a winner. Not one with a World Series championship, but hey, he did save the Tigers. He is the best manager the team had since Sparky Anderson. I'd like to see a World Series win for the Tigers...

...but now, it's in the hands of another man.

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Got a Bee-otch to nominate? E-mail us @ chuck69dotcom@gmail.com. All suggestions (except for me) are welcome!

Bee-otch of the Day Archives can be seen on http://beeotchoftheday.blogspot.com!

Bee-otch of the Day is a production of Chuck69.com, Grand Rapids' site for Stern, politics and more!

Monday, October 21, 2013

OUR FIRST PODCAST!



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10.21.13 Hero of the Day: Lou Scheimer


Bee-otch of the Day honors are awarded Monday through Thursday, Bee-otch of the Week is awarded Friday on Chuck69.com.



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----------------
A SPECIAL HERO OF THE DAY!



Name: Lou Scheimer
Age: was 84
Occupation: founder and president, Filmation Associates
Last Seen: up in the heavens with Norm Prescott, deciding whose name should stay on top
Awarded For: giving us great childhood memories


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For millions of kids growing up in the 60's, 70's and 80's, Saturday mornings were magical.

You woke up, grabbed a bowl of cereal and flipped on the TV for cartoons. Many of those animated memories, such as The Superman/Batman Hour, The Archie Show, Fat Albert and the Cosby Kids, He-Man and the Masters of the Universe and its spinoff, She-Ra: Princess of Power were brought to us by Filmation, a Reseda, CA-based company founded 50 years ago this year by three gentlemen who wanted to bring good animation to TV: Norm Prescott, Hal Sutherland and its president, Lou Scheimer.

Despite its three founders, Lou was the undisputed champion behind the company, especially when Hal retired in 1974 and Norm followed suit in 1982 when the company was bought out. Although many animation purists raised on Bugs Bunny and Tom and Jerry criticized Filmation for its bland animation, Lou realized that the real critics were the children who watched his shows. Like its main rival, Hanna-Barbera, Filmation had its hits, but its misses, too.

Lou had humble beginnings; he was born 85 years ago last Saturday to a Russian mother and a German father. Neither spoke good English; as a matter of fact, they communicated in Yiddish. Not long after their son Louis was born, the Scheimers purchased a small grocery store, which made them barely enough money to live on, especially through the Great Depression. Sadly, Lou's dad died when he was just 14 years old, so he and his mother were left to tend the grocery. He wanted to go to Carnegie Tech to study fine arts, but money was tight. After graduating high school, Lou enlisted in the Army right after the second World War. He got out with enough money to go to Carnegie. He graduated in 1952, married his girlfriend, Jay and moved to Los Angeles to to pursue a career in animation. He did, working for Walter Lantz (who hired him because he looked like his brother), Larry Harmon and a few others. It was at Harmon's where he helped animate Popeye and Bozo the Clown cartoons.

While working for Larry Harmon, Lou met a man named Hal Sutherland, who previously worked for Walt Disney. The two became close pals and when Harmon abandoned making animated cartoons, the two had an idea: start their own animation studio. Lou suggested "Filmation" because it was animation on film and it would be fun. The name stuck and the two pitched the idea to a friend of theirs, a DJ from Boston named Norm Prescott. In 1963, Filmation was born.

For the next three years, Filmation did odd jobs, making everything from commercials to animation sequences for movies. The company was hardly making a dime. However, in 1966, the company got a call from Superman. Mort Weisinger, the editor-in-chief of DC Comics wanted Filmation to make a 13-episode series of Superman cartoons for Saturday mornings. Norm Prescott flew to New York to negotiate the deal and called Lou that they got the deal. However, Norm also said "by the way, they want to look at the studio" and Lou responded, "WHAT STUDIO?!?!" At the time, Filmation was just Lou, Hal and Norm and not much else. So, Lou and Hal called up everybody they knew - family, friends and laid-off Hanna Barbera animators - to come to the studio to fill up some desks. The deal was a success. DC execs were paraded throughout the studio and The Superman/Batman Hour was a Saturday morning hit on CBS.

Soon, other properties begged Filmation to animate their shows, including Archie Comics, Paramount (The Brady Kids and Star Trek) and many others. While H-B was dominant with hits like Scooby-Doo and The Flintstones, Filmation did things Bill and Joe couldn't do. In 1969, the song "Sugar Sugar" was a #1 hit on the pop charts (from The Archie Show) and in 1972, they helped to create the first-ever Saturday morning cartoon with a mostly-black cast, Fat Albert and the Cosby Kids. That show was Filmation's longest-running - albeit non-consecutively due to Bill Cosby's hectic schedule - running from 1972-1985.

Throughout the 1970's, Filmation grew and grew; they even had their own shows, such as the Laugh-In-esque Groovie Goolies, which were the subject of criticism when they were paired with most of the Warner Bros. Looney Tunes in the 1972 made-for-TV film Daffy Duck and Porky Pig Meet the Groovie Goolies. Critics bashed the movie because of its lackluster animation and poor character design. It was Filmation's most-major flaws: piss-poor animation. However, Lou defended the company telling people that kids can't count how many drawings go into his shows. Plus, if the networks gave him more money and time, the results would have been a lot more different. One way Filmation went around its budget was to re-use scenes by using rotoscoping: using actors to create shots and animators racing over those shots to create scenes. Many animators, including its inventor, Betty Boop animator Max Fleischer used rotoscoping to create realistic shots.

Filmation also had a great deal of live-action shows as well, including Shazam!, Ark II, Jason of Star Command and The Ghost Busters, a 1975 show starring F-Troopers Larry Storch and Forrest Tucker that was ripped off by Columbia Pictures in 1984 for the hit movie of their own. Filmation sued Columbia and won.

By the 1980's, Filmation was the top animation studio on television. In 1982, the company - which Lou, Norm and Hal sold to TelePrompTer in 1969 - was sold to Westinghouse/Group W Broadcasting. Lou used Group W's resources to stay away from the networks and their censors. In 1983, he made a first when he licensed the Masters of the Universe action figures from Mattel to create the He-Man series. Because the FCC did not allow networks to broadcast shows based on toys, Lou was thankful for Group W's syndication services to ship the show out to TV stations as a first-run show. With 65 episodes produced for one season, stations could air the show for two months straight without a repeat.

Throughout the 80's, Filmation also pumped out He-Man's spinoff, She-Ra and a new animated series of Ghostbusters cartoons to counter Columbia's version of the franchise. Filmation's last series, Bravestarr, aired from 1987-1988.

However, Lou constantly sparred with Group W over the direction of the company. Group W wanted Filmation to move all of its production overseas in the age of Reaganomics while Lou was for protecting American jobs. While he had to please his bosses by moving some aspects to South Korea, he made sure that in the age of his rivals abandoning American ingenuity, he kept it alive and well. Sadly, the fact that Lou also made a few theatrical bombs such as Pinocchio and the Emperor of Night and BraveStarr: The Movie didn't help his relationship with Group W. So, he shopped Filmation to French cosmetic giant L'Oreal. However, on February 3, 1989, Group W shuttered Filmation just before the sale was completed, leaving hundreds without jobs. When Lou made the announcement to his employees, a round of applause was made to him when he left the podium. He fought hard for his people, and his people loved him back.

Since Filmation's closure, Lou started another company, Lou Scheimer Productions. He had a few projects - mostly adult cartoons - but they were never officially released. His health started to deteriorate and had quadruple bypass surgery and was diagnosed with Parkinson's Disease. However, he remained a consultant with several companies and even made appearances at several conventions. However, his health continued to worsen because of Parkinson's and heart disease. He made his last public appearance last year at the San Diego Comic Con alongside several former Filmation staffers and friends to talk about his years in the business. He was frail and didn't speak in very long sentences, but he was still loaded with a sense of humor. Sid Haig talked about the hectic shooting schedule of Jason of Star Command, where he played the evil villain, and Lou yelled, "DON'T LOOK AT ME!"

While some scoff at Lou's embarrassments, he was a champion. He proved that a mostly-black cartoon show could survive on Saturday mornings. He stopped a battle between him and follow producer Norm Prescott in regards to screen credit by putting their names in a rotating circle so nobody's names stayed on top. He was a true family man, giving his wife Jay and children Erika and Lane jobs at the company doing voicework. He fought his bosses to protect the small guy. His company was the starting point for animation legends like Sam Simon, John Kricfalusi and William "Bill" Wray. He even brought back Star Trek to television in 1973 in cartoon form five years after NBC canceled it due to "poor ratings" and won an Emmy for that. When his daughter Erika came out of the closet in 2007, he was proud of her. The list goes on and on.

Lou's long battle with Parkinson's and heart disease came to an end last Thursday, just two days before his 85th birthday. He's survived by his wife MaryAnn (Jay died in 2009), and his children. He's also professionally survived by Hal Sutherland, who is now the sole surviving founder of Filmation (Prescott died in 2007). It's ironic that many of his fans got the sad news... On a Saturday morning. Thankfully, several cable and digital networks such as Bounce TV and Retro TV show many of Filmation's old shows. Part of it's due to the fact that these days, DreamWorks now owns them, and many ex-Filmation staffers now work there. Lou died very proud that his legacy will go on forever.

And as for that battle between him and Norm Prescott regarding credit, well, God loves everybody equally.

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Got a Bee-otch to nominate? E-mail us @ chuck69dotcom@gmail.com. All suggestions (except for me) are welcome!

Bee-otch of the Day Archives can be seen on http://beeotchoftheday.blogspot.com!

Bee-otch of the Day is a production of Chuck69.com, Grand Rapids' site for Stern, politics and more!


Wednesday, October 16, 2013

10.16.13 Bee-otch of the Day: Northern Star Broadcasting


Bee-otch of the Day honors are awarded Monday through Thursday, Bee-otch of the Week is awarded Friday on Chuck69.com.



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Name: Northern Star Broadcasting
Age: 15
Occupation: media company
Last Seen: Traverse City/Cheboygan, MI
Bee-otched For: hitting the 'x' button

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I love it how the rock format does very well - especially when it's programmed well - and yet, it's the red-headed stepchild of radio.

Here in Grand Rapids, WGRD is a well-programmed station and it shows. Last Summer, it was 3rd place overall in the ratings, even beating out the two CHRs. People love rock radio, but it's too bad when in some towns, the people running the stations act like they have their tail between their legs.

Up until last year, northern Michigan had a somewhat-decent station in Real Rock 105/95-5. However, starting late last year, they started dicking around with the format, adding in lots of 1970's butt rock normally heard on WKLT and Real Rock's sister, The Bear and it started to piss off their listeners. Then on April Fool's Day of this year, they dropped the 95.5 signal and flipped that to boring-ass AC as EZ 95-5/106-3 and the rock format was kept on 105.1 as simply Rock 105. So far, Rock 105 still does OK, but EZ isn't. So far, since flipping to AC earlier this year, their Facebook page has only had 90 or so likes while Rock 105 has more than 1,200, many of whom are pissed over the switch, especially those in the Traverse City area where 105.1's signal is horrible.

So, guess what? I took action, and wrote this on EZ's Facebook page last week:

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Greetings,

For many years, I, like many who grew up in northern Michigan (and elsewhere) have had his or her likes and dislikes of the local radio scene. And sadly, WQEZ is a major DISLIKE.

Six months ago on April Fool's Day, you flipped 95.5 to WQEZ and demoted Real Rock 105/95-5 to simply Rock 105, angering many in the Grand Traverse region and those who love hard rock and metal. I look at Rock 105's playlist, and while it's not too bad, the problems include 1) the lack of current rock and 2) the fact that Rock 105 plays bands that no fan of hard rock and metal likes, such as Fall Out Boy, Tom Petty and All-American Rejects. Also, I think it's sad that you also canned The Asylum, which I thought was a decent show for a fake jock from Westwood One playing the same stuff you play during the week.

What should be embarrassing in your case is the fact that Real Rock 105/95-5 was your strongest station according to Arbitron. In the Fall 2012, Real Rock was at a 3.8 while Big Country was at a 3.0 and The Bear was at a 1.9 all signals combined. So what do you do? You trade off 94.5/93.9 to the teabaggers for 106.3, move the Straits area Bear to 97.7 and dump your EZ format onto 95.5. In the process, you also can Free Beer and Hot Wings, telling your listeners that the ratings were bad. You end up spinning the fact that both stations were at a 1.9, but that's a bunch of bunk. You kill off rock on 95.5 while The Bear was salvaged, even though that was the station that should have been killed off. KLT and its morning show made The Bear useless years ago. Bob and Tom are old, unfunny and no longer relevant, especially since the Janet Jackson nip slip of 2004.

Now, the general public has no access to the Fall 2013 Arbitron ratings. But there's proof that Easy 95.5 isn't working: this page. Rock 105 has 1,541 likes while Easy only has 90. It's true: virtually nobody likes 95.5 now. Rock 105's Facebook page has more complaints about the format change than this page has compliments about the fact that Traverse City now has a station that plays a lot of Barbra Streisand, James Taylor and other artists that nobody under the age of 50 cares about.

I know, Traverse City is quickly becoming a retirement haven for late-term Baby Boomers and it's not going to change anytime soon. But haven't you people learned the lessons others have learned regarding WSRT? It had awesome ratings as The Peak, but when it flipped to AC, it was a downright embarrassment. The only time it had good numbers was when the PD and his wife sent in fake diaries to Arbitron. Northern Broadcast finally got a clue and flipped the station a few times to its current ESPN format.

Heck, look at Lite 96: 3.5 in the ratings. Clearly, this market cannot support two ACs. This is a market where country, oldies/classic hits, CHR and rock are strong. AC is a dying format, and it's sad that instead of going after a sea of young, strong fish, you go after a few old shriveled ones.

Look. I fear for radio's future. Us in our 20's and 30's have a lot of alternatives to terrestrial radio. Up until a few weeks ago, I had Sirius. But, I dropped that for Slacker because that service is free and easy to program. You no longer have to worry about just Biederman, MacDonald-Garber, Northern or Henderson, because you're now dealing with the plethora of digital services out there that have every format out there, no matter where you are. All you need is a smartphone.

Because of this, and the fact that big corporations and labels are ruining radio stations of all sizes, I do wonder if your stations - and almost every station in northern Michigan - will be around 20 years from now. The fact that you've alienated a lot of the rock crowd in Traverse City for retirees with fixed incomes only makes things hard on you. Remember, when K-Rock in New York was blown up for Free FM when Howard Stern left for Sirius, the audience left in droves. But when CBS decided to bring the format back to 92.3, the damage was done.

All I'm saying is this: I hope that crow tastes good.

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Yep, you guessed it: they deleted my post off their Facebook page. What a bunch of fucking cowards.

I think it sucks that the major station owners in northern Michigan - Ross Biederman, Trish MacDonald-Garber, Langer Gokey, Del Reynolds and Roy Henderson - all seem to pretend that there's no market for males 18-49 in northern Michigan. Yeah, there's Reynolds' 105, but sadly, like I said in the letter, they're only fetching their listeners a bone these days. There might not be a lot of 20- and 30-somethings who live up north, but being a four seasons area with skiiing, hunting, snowmobiling and so much more, there's always a market for rock up north that doesn't involve Styx, Foreigner or Lynyrd Skynyrd.

If I had the dough, I'd buy out Roy Henderson's stations, spin off everything except WLDR and maybe 750 in Petoskey. I'd maybe even plead to the teabaggers that own WYPV to sell me those stations too and I'd flip all three stations (four if you count translator 98.1 in Alpena) and flip all those stations to active rock. I think a kick-ass active rocker would do EXCELLENT in northern Michigan; it just needs a good signal to be competitive against WKLT or even The Bear. I think both stations are vulnerable these days because both are quite repetitive, plus there's Q100 out of Grayling, which I think is an awesome station when it comes to classic rock.

I know, all the station owners in northern Michigan - sans Biederman - are baby boomers, but it shouldn't mean that all of their stations should all have the same audience. What will happen to northern Michigan's stations 10 years down the road? 20? 30? Yeah, I know: northern Michigan's internet system's not the greatest, which might prolong their dependence on local radio. But, I sure as hell don't want to sit through the same 200 songs over and over and only get to hear one new song out of that bunch. Plus, I hate CHR and country, and classic rock and oldies are a hit or miss for me.

Cumulus, CBS and Clear Channel: they're aren't the only ones killing radio.  

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Tuesday, October 15, 2013

10.15.13 Bee-otch of the Day: Cumulus



Bee-otch of the Day honors are awarded Monday through Thursday, Bee-otch of the Week is awarded Friday on Chuck69.com.



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Name: Cumulus Media
Age: 16
Occupation: media Goliath
Last Seen: Atlanta
Bee-otched For: effing up

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If you ever wanted to know what was wrong with radio, leave it up to the three C's: Clear Channel, CBS and Cumulus.

Some wonder who is the lesser of the evils, and personally, I don't care. They're all evil, IMO, but since Cumulus I think needs to be ribbed by me more often, they're my target for today.
Case in point: the fact that their sports station here in Grand Rapids, WBBL is one big fucking abortion.

Last week, the Neilson ratings were released, and The Ball was the second-lowest-rated station of those still getting ratings. The station is at a dismal 1.3.

But that's not the only problem Cumulus has in GR; their talker, WJRW 1430 has a dismal .5. Some, like myself wonder how a station with lots of local hosts can survive with that rating. Most of their other stations, like country Thunder 94.5 and 105.3 Hot FM are also barely breathing in comparison to their competitors.

However, their bright spot here is WLAV 96.9, which is back to being the #1 rocker in Grand Rapids with a 7.7. WGRD also improved to a 7.2, but then again, WLAV's ratings are in part due to the fact that they carry the Detroit Tigers.

Even with the late Matt Hanlon out the building, the old Citadel stations are still a giant waste of electricity here in Grand Rapids. Even worse, the company as a whole isn't doing much better elsewhere.

Case in point: New York City. I shake my head at the fact that Cumulus flipped a crappy religious station at 94.7 to an equally-crappy country outlet with a crappy name called Nash FM. So far, the ratings for Nash are bland, especially for a market like New York. Right now, they're at a 1.9, and they've peaked at a 2.1 a few months ago. Even more, I'm pissed that New York, the biggest market in the country HAS NO NEW ROCK STATION! The last several new rockers the city had, i.e. both incarnations of WRXP all did way better than Nash FM. New York is a rock town, especially since CBGB's (which stood for "Country, Blues and Bluegrass") was a failing country music club when it went punk in 1976 or so. How a town like New York be without a new rock station is beyond me.

But in Detroit, Cumulus is a joke there, too. WDVD's ratings have slid over time, Doug FM is, well, Doug FM and WJR is a true laughing stock over the fact that in January, they're moving Michael Weiner from late nights to afternoons. Funny and unusual since WJR is supposed to be the old geezer station and Weiner's music beds are all hard rock tunes (bear in mind that his theme song is "Master of Puppets" by Metallica). I thought that 50 years ago, WJR promised their listeners that they would never play a rock record. Boy, have times changed. Personally, I would rather hear death metal on WJR over the right-winged bullshit they air now.

Sadly, that's Cumulus for ya. They only care about profit and the listener comes last. It's sad that they haven't undone all of Hanlon's problems since he was canned when the merger happened, and it's killing them. When will they realize that nobody in Grand Rapids likes "Huge" Bill Simonson? How does this prick get to have a radio show and sponsors like Brann's and his station is at a 1.3? Hell, the station did better when it was at 1340! ESPN 96.1 has made WBBL its bitch, and they don't carry any of the Detroit teams. They get ratings - and not much better ones - just by having better programming.

In other news, damn is Slacker awesome!

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Monday, October 14, 2013

10.14.13 Bee-otch of the Day: Christopher Columbus


Bee-otch of the Day honors are awarded Monday through Thursday, Bee-otch of the Week is awarded Friday on Chuck69.com.



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Name: Christopher Columbus
Age: would be 562 today
Occupation: traitor
Last Seen: died in Spain
Bee-otched For: the fact that because of him, some people get to have the day off

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Today, you won't be getting the mail.

Plus, many government offices are closed as well, shutdown or not.

Yep, it's Columbus Day, where We the People get to honor the man who "founded" America in 1492, Christopher Columbus. With his three ships, he sailed the oceans and made other peoples' countries his. It's because of Columbus, many feel that this nation was founded on a lie. The real Americans are the natives who lived in tribes, but ended up losing their lands because of Columbus and his crooks. They slaughtered and killed off these otherwise peaceful people just because he wanted control.

Sadly, many have looked at Columbus as a founding father and even decided to give him his own holiday in 1937. True, it must be nice to be a postal worker or a banker, but for the rest of us, we get to work. Thankfully, we've reversed a lot of what Columbus did, by allowing Native Americans to be exempt from government rules through reparations on their own land. That's why Michigan has many casinos. Even though the damage is done, people should never forget why this nation is a melting pot. Many whites wonder why there's Mexicans here, but yet, the Native Americans think the same thing also.

I will, however admit that I am against the NFL wanting the Washington Redskins to change their name. I agree that names like the Braves, Indians, Redskins and Chiefs all came at a time when it was OK for a white man to bash those of color (although I kinda wonder why there's no teams called the Wetbacks or the Darkies, but oh, well...). I think it has to do with tradition. They don't mean to bash people of race, but that's the case when it was a time when it was OK to do so. Censoring the past won't make things better, nor will taking a gas can and matches to burn it all down and rebuild. Besides, I think the Redskins' logo is quite classy. The Cleveland Indians, however...

In the end, if I had it my way, I think schools should teach kids that Columbus was a traitor and a slaughterer. He didn't find America at all. I think Columbus Day is a joke and should be abolished. It's time to know the truth.

At least the modern Indians know how to get their money back, and it's the fact that most of the time, you won't get straight sevens.

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