Bee-otch of the Day

Monday, March 21, 2011

3.21.11 Bee-otch of the Day: people who didn't vote in 2010

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Names: various
Ages: various
Occupations: various
Last Seen: everywhere
Bee-otched For: not voting

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In the past month, the picket signs have been up in Wisconsin and Michigan over union rights.

Wisconsin's protests lasted for several weeks, but Michigan's lasted just one day, not counting the day prior when the AARP protested over retirement rights at the state capitol.

Now, I hate to defend both Scott Walker and Rick Snyder, but here's an observation: how many of these protesters ACTUALLY voted in the 2010 midterms?

Let's face it: Rick Snyder won by 20% of the vote over opponent Virg Bernero. But, in Wisconsin, Walker won by just 125,000 votes over Tom Barret. About two million people voted in that state, population 5.7 million. I understand that many of those people are those under 18 and cannot vote, but the question remains: why DON'T people vote?

I think the sick, sad reason is simple: people think that because Obama won in 2008 and is our president that the worst is over. It isn't. Look at Michigan. For eight years, we had Jennifer Granholm as our governor and many blame her for the fact that this state went into a free-fall this past decade. Jobs disappeared and she didn't do much. The truth was that the Republicans were screwing things up by sending jobs overseas and to Right to Work states. Let's not also forget that much of this bullshit actually began back in the 1980s with Reagan and his policies to bust up unions. Let's not also forget the fact that in 1987, his FCC abolished the decades old Fairness Doctrine, which forced broadcasters to air opinions from all sides. Now, you put it on an AM talk station, and it's Republican sympathizers 24/7.

But, there's also the reason that people have empathy towards voting. The media blames everything on Obama and the fact that he can't save the country overnight. So, people take it as the wind blows and they have others opine for them.

The truth is, I love to vote. Why? Because it's time to wipe this nation clean of the right-winged bullshit that has destroyed this nation for generations. I want America to come back and create high-paying jobs for everybody. But as long as we allow right-wingers to win, the middle class will get out their signs and protest, even though some of them allowed this to happen.

Do we want change in Michigan? YES! But Rick Snyder's plan for change is to transform Michigan from a union state to a Right to Work one, causing workers in this state to struggle. Bills keep going up, but pay hasn't for most people. The only way for us to make things work is to turn off Fox News Channel and Rush Limbaugh and wake the fuck up. Michael Moore's not a bad guy, he stands up for the middle class! Why are Rush and his kin standing against him? Same with radio show hosts like Thom Hartmann and Mike Malloy. Let's listen to what the left has to say because after all, when you privatize something, it goes straight to hell.

So in 2012, do the world a favor: VOTE FOR OBAMA AGAIN!

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Wednesday, March 16, 2011

3.17.11 Bee-otch of the Day: Rick Snyder

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Name: Rick Snyder
Age: 52
Occupation: multi-millionaire
Last Seen: Lansing, MI
Bee-otched For: pissing way too many people off

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It's official: we're screwed.

On Wednesday afternoon, Michigan governor Rick Snyder proved to the state that he's nothing more than a CEO in charge as he signed into law six bills that would allow emergency financial managers running cities and schools to strip people of their union contracts. Many Democrats and union supporters felt that Snyder's bill would create dictatorships and force local leaders out of office.

While Snyder was pissing off unions, 3,000-plus people were protesting at the Capitol, angered at the fact that Snyder would strip unions' rights while preserving the finances of the state's billionaires. As a matter of fact, according to Michael Moore's Twitter, Snyder was at an insurance company's headquarters congratulating them on $100 billion in assets.

Also, it's worth noting that there were some arrests, including five young adults that were still in the Capitol when it was closing down for the day. Jonathan Jones, a Kalamazoo Valley Community College student who was arrested said "if I don't have moral integrity, what do I have?"

It's true: Rick Snyder's a man with no morals. He relied on Granholm haters to elect him since the right attacked her for years. The truth is - and I'm tired of saying this - it's jerkoffs like Reagan, the two Bushes, Engler and eventually Snyder who are destroying this once great state. The solution isn't to screw the middle class, it's to convince the wealthy that they don't need too much money to survive. Our state has people like Meijer, DeVos and Ford to help us out. If they don't want to budge, it'll only make them more evil and make us all want to avoid their products.

Remember, it was the Democrats who saved the auto industry. We bought GM and now it's profitable. Same as Chrysler. I want Michigan to come back, but all Snyder is doing is popping champagne bottles with his CEO buddies. Look, I'll be 30 in May, and it's time for me to grow up and move on. Thanks to the Repukes, I haven't had a raise in years and my apartment could be better. However, I'm in better shape than many people who went from making $30 at GM to $9.32 an hour at Walmart at 35 hours per week who are about to lose their homes.

Once again, here's another phrase I'm tired of using, but it'll be useful for the next four years: don't blame me, I've never voted for a Republican.

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3.16.11 Bee-otch of the Day: Aflac

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Name: American Life Assurance Company of Columbus
Age: 56
Occupation: supplemental insurance company
Last Seen: Columbus, GA
Bee-otched For: ducking Gilbert Gottfried

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In this lifetime, when a comedian makes off-color jokes, everything's A-OK.

But if it's about the recent earthquake and tsunami in Japan, you're gonna lose your job.

It's official: Aflac has fired Gilbert Gottfried as the iconic voice of the Aflac Duck after he made some raucous comments regarding the recent disaster that has left over 2,000 dead and fears of a nuclear disaster. On his Twitter account, Gottfried made several jokes about the disaster that many are crying "too soon". The tweets have been removed, but one of them said that the Japanese were so advanced that instead of going to the beach, the beach comes to them. Apparently, Aflac does a lot of business in that country - one out of four households - so it's no laughing matter to them.

Weird, since Gottfried's been making off-color jokes for years. He's a regular at comedy roasts and even The Howard Stern Show, which frequently uses his soundbyte "what are you, a homo?" His jokes attack people of all races, creeds. religion and such, but when it comes to tragedy, it's time for Aflac to make Duck Soup out of the 30-year comedy vet.

The Aflac Duck was introduced in 1999, and not long afterward, the company hired the nasally-voiced Gottfried to do the bird's voice. The ads were so popular that in 2005, Aflac changed their logo to incorporate the duck.

With Gottfried's canning, Aflac will do a nationwide search to replace Gottfried as the voice of the duck. Mel Blanc was Bugs Bunny and Jim Henson was Kermit the Frog. They were replaced only because they died, and their replacements weren't as good as the original. Gottfried's still around, and it just won't be the same without him.

You see, I've learned that people can be so hypocritical when they judge others. I've been judged by some of the most-fucked-up assholes in life and I've seen the hypocrisy in them. Aflac knew for years that Gottfried has never had a rosy image despite the fact that he's done family-friendly stuff like the parrot from Disney's Aladdin and the principal from the Problem Child movies. There's no law stating that R-rated comics can't do G-rated stuff; just ask Richard Pryor, George Carlin and even Chris Rock.

But, who knows? Aflac's a southern company and I'll betcha their owners aren't the sharpest tools in the shed. They're just publicity whores looking for free advertising, plain and simple. Thank God I don't deal with them.

I just hope they don't replace him with "Huge" Bill Simonson. Just imagine the duck saying "before I say the name of the company, this portion of this ad is brought to you by Little Caesars. When it's time for a HUGE pizza deal, look to the $5.55 Hot-N-Ready everyday at Little Caesars, and that portion of this ad is brought to you by Miller Lite...."

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Tuesday, March 15, 2011

3.15.11 Bee-otch of the Day: Rick Snyder

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Name: Rick Snyder
Age: 53
Occupation: former CEO, Gateway
Last Seen: Lansing, MI
Bee-otched For: chasing away Fiddy... and maybe even Grandma

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Oh, no! Not Fiddy!

It's true. Rapper/actor Curtis "50 Cent" Jackson's new movie "Freelancers" is moving its filming locale to Louisiana because of the troubled future of the state's film initiative. Michigan had the highest rate in the nation, but it's being capped at $25 million because of the latest budget from governor Rick Snyder.

It's not just the only production being moved; a $100 million prequel to "The Wizard of Oz" called "Oz: The Great and Powerful" is being moved to California because of Snyder's budget proposals. Last year, because of the film initiative, 50 movie and TV shows were shot in the state. Now, thanks to the $25 million cap, one or two will only get filmed, if best.

But that's not all; according to the governor's budget proposals, businesses in the state will receive $1.8 billion in rebates. Guess where the money's coming from? The wealthy? Nope. How about people who shouldn't get taxed? Ding, ding, ding, ding.

Yep! According to Rachel Maddow, the money to fund Snyder's business bullshit's coming from, of all people, the elderly and poor people. Those folks will get a $1.7 billion tax hike so people like the DeVoses can rake in more money.

You know, I loved the film initiative. One of my favorite stories about it regarded the Michael Cera flick "Youth in Revolt". It was filmed mainly in Frankfort, MI, which is tucked away in the middle of nowhere on Lake Michigan's shoreline. People in this small town of 1,500 were damn happy to have the dude from "Superbad" in their town. Hell, the film had its debut at their Garden Theatre, which was in disrepair just a few years ago until new owners and community volunteers stepped in and fixed it up.

Thanks to Snyder, the fun's gonna end, the unions will get even more busted and I think more people will leave the state. Michigan was the only state in the past ten years to lose population. Guess what? It wasn't Granholm's fault! It was because Repukes were making deals with Toyota to build factories in right to work states like Mississippi to avoid the unions. Thing is, we're not broke. Thanks to people like Reagan, the two Bushes, Engler and now Snyder, the wealthy are sitting on what should be raises and money for US.

But hey, I didn't vote for him.

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Monday, March 14, 2011

3.14.11 Bee-otch of the Day: Citadel Broadcasting

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Name: Citadel Broadcasting
Age: 27
Occupation: broadcast giant
Last Seen: Las Vegas
Bee-otched For: becoming even bigger

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Janis Joplin, Kurt Cobain, Brian Jones, Jim Morrison and Jimi Hendrix all met their maker at the tender age of 27.

Now, it's going to be Citadel Broadcasting's turn.

Last week, it was announced that Cumulus Broadcasting had finalized their buyout of Citadel and its assets for just over $2.4 billion. The buyout will involve its radio stations and what used to be the ABC Radio Network, which is now Citadel Media. Cumulus will end up with 572 radio stations and radio stations in all major Arbitron markets in Michigan except Traverse City.

For years, Citadel had been a bitch in the world of broadcasting and deservingly so. Here in Grand Rapids, it all started in 2002 when the company appointed Matt Hanlon as the General Manager of their cluster there. Since his takeover, he's managed to destroy rock leader WKLQ while their audience migrated over to WGRD, making that station Grand Rapids' rock leader, he's fired many hard-working people and replaced them with no-talent jerk-offs like Michael Grey and Darren Arriens, he hired many big-market losers like Ron and Don and Kevin Matthews to no-good ratings and so on. Let's not forget how he screwed over Howard Stern and his listeners here in Grand Rapids.

And even though none of his stations are in the top five in the Arbitrons, plus the fact that he helped Citadel run into bankruptcy, good 'ol Matty boy's still in charge.

But tragically, Cumulus ain't much better, at least on a political standpoint. In the early 2000's, they dumped Howard Stern from all of their stations claiming that his show was too expensive to air, even though in most markets, airing his show's the same price as airing Rush Limbaugh. Affected markets included Toledo and Davenport, IA.

Let's not forget that it was Cumulus that made it cool to hate the Dixie Chicks because of lead singer Natalie Maines' Bush-bashing on stage in London. To prove that they've pledged alliegence to the Bush Crime family, most of their Top 40 pop stations now air Billy Bush's nighttime radio show. While a young DJ is struggling to find a job, Billy boy gets to make more money.

The point is, it's corporate radio business as usual. Listeners come last while the neocon advertisers come first. Meanwhile in the process, the listener now has more options, such as satellite radio and MP3s. For many like myself, terrestrial radio is as useful as the 8-track player or (lol) HD radio.

I still feel that terrestrial radio needs to work harder to maintain listenership if they want to keep them. Billy Bush won't save radio, and neither will blacklisting the Dixie Chicks. Hell, there's a small daytime-only country station in North Carolina that played the Dixie Chicks recently, and on their Facebook page, a man thanked them for playing them.

Radio: it's time for a change.

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Thursday, March 10, 2011

3.10.11 Bee-otch of the Day: Rick Snyder

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Name: Rick Snyder
Age: 53
Occupation: former chairman, Gateway Computers
Last Seen: Lansing, MI
Bee-otched For: screwing over unions

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Don't blame me, I never voted Republican in my life, and I may never will.

Right now in Michigan's capitol in Lansing, hundreds of protesters are angry over a bill that would limit the power of unions. This time, a bill is steadfastly moving through the state senate that would give the power to emergency financial managers to throw out union contracts. So in other words, if a city or business is failing and their workers are unionized, their pay will go down from $30 per hour to $8. AFL-CIO president Mark Gaffney told The Detroit Free Press that Snyder's proposed cuts would hurt schools and cities, and that it would reduce state aid.

State treasurer Andy Dillon (D) claims that state aid to districts and cities could get lower due to shrinking property values linked to jobs disappearing and people moving elsewhere.

People, don't you know? UNIONS=JOBS. The reason why jobs are leaving this state are due to multiple factors, such as free trade in countries where workers get paid a few bucks per day and jobs moving to right to work states where people are expected to make a living on $8 per hour. Sadly, this is what we get when we elect another asshole Republican in office. Instead of taxing the evil rich jerks who hoard all the money in the world, we go after what little money the middle class has.

Ya see, folks? That's what happens when we elect a rich white CEO instead of a "career politician" like Virg Bernero. If Virg were governor, he could work with Obama to return Michigan to being a state where people have money and jobs. Instead, we end up with empty storefronts, no jobs and depression. Last weekend, I was talking with my uncle in Grand Blanc who recently worked in Seattle and South Carolina. The people there were happy and the chicks were happy. Here in Michigan, the claws come out.

Sadly, the only people smiling are those with money who don't believe in raises. And as long as Snyder's our governor, that's what's happening.

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Wednesday, March 9, 2011

3.9.11 Bee-otches of the Day: Dish Network and LIN Media

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Names: Dish Network and LIN Media
Ages: 15, 50
Occupation: media giants
Last Seen: Meridian, CO and Providence, RI
Bee-otched For: screwing over millions of viewers

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This is one of the reasons why I can be proud to be a Grand Rapidian: I have two ABC stations.

Ummmm, make that one now.

On Saturday morning, Dish Network lost the feeds of local TV stations owned by the Louisville/Indianapolis/Nashville Media Corporation when the contract to carry their programming expired. LIN's 31 stations have been affected, including Indianapolis CBS station WISH 8, Fox WLUK 11 Green Bay, ABC WTNH 8 New Haven/Hartford, CBS WIVB 4 Buffalo and CBS WPRI 12 in their homebase in Providence.

And yes, NBC WOOD-TV 8 and ABC WOTV 41 here in Grand Rapids.

Right now, Dish has plastered a title card on the affected channels with softcore porn music in the background. The graphic explains that LIN wants to charge Dish a whopping 175% increase to carry their channels and that they're not even returning their calls. However, on WOOD-TV's website (and other LIN sites as well), they explain that Dish is overexaggerating their claim because local TV stations don't charge the rates big networks charge, and that they only charge pennies per day.

This ain't the first time Dish has had disputes with their distributors. Several years ago, MTV, Nickelodeon, BET, Comedy Central and other Viacom channels were yanked off due to a similar dispute. Last year, another dispute erupted between them and News Corp regarding the regional Fox Sports Net channels, plus FX and National Geographic Channel.

Oh, and (sadly) I have Dish, and due to circumstances beyond my control, I can't dump them. My rates went up $5 last month.

Of course, losing WOOD and WOTV's no big loss for me. Why? Because I have an antenna. I can get WOOD-TV quite easily, thank you very much. WOTV is a hassle, though, but not to worry. Dish still has WZZM-13.

Bear in mind why Grand Rapids has two ABCs. WOOD-TV signed on as WLAV 7 in 1949 and WWMT 3 (then WKZO) a year later in Kalamazoo. Both stations aired programming all the major networks since WLAV broadcasted exclusively to Grand Rapids while WKZO did the same thing to Kalamazoo. In 1951, WLAV was sold to WOOD radio's owners and it became WOOD-TV, and it moved to channel 8 to alleviate interference from WLS (WBKB)-TV Chicago. In the late 50's, both stations realized that the two towns were too close together to be their own markets, so they both moved their towers equidistant to each other. WOOD moved to Middleville while WKZO moved to Gun Lake. WOOD sided with NBC, WKZO went with CBS and both stations cherry-picked some ABC shows. However, in the early 1960's, a group of investors wanted to start an ABC station in Grand Rapids. Problem was, the only place where they could do it was on the dreaded UHF band since nearby towns such as Chicago, Lansing and Detroit took all of the available slots on the VHF band. But guess what? The nearest channel 13 to Grand Rapids at the time was WKZO owner John Fetzer's WWTV in Cadillac. So, they paid Fetzer to move 13 to 9, which boosted the station's signal further north to Traverse City and WZZM 13 was born. Problem was, there were channel 13s in Toledo and Rockford, Il, so the FCC basically told WZZM that they could broadcast on 13 as long as they were north of town. For many years, WZZM had a translator station in Kalamazoo at channel 12, weak enough to protect WJRT in Flint. In 1964, the FCC ordered all TV sets to have UHF capabilities; one reason why WZZM didn't choose to broadcast on UHF was due to the lack of TV sets with the band at the time. However, in 1971, WUHQ-TV 41 in Battle Creek debuted, serving as a defacto ABC station to Kalamazoo and parts of Lansing. Through the years, ABC has allowed both stations to broadcast their programming, mainly due to WZZM's lack of signal south of Grand Rapids. However, since both stations are must-carry on local cable per FCC rules, we get two ABCs.

Now that I've ruined most of my chances of getting laid in this town with that last, boring-ass statement, let me say this: this is nothing more than big companies fighting like a domestic dispute between parents and the kids are sitting on top of the stairs, holding a teddy bear and crying. To me, losing both stations over Dish Network ain't much, but somehow, this fight will get resolved and our rates will increase. Same 'ol shit.

No wonder why people are dumping their cable.

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