Thursday, March 21, 2019

3.21.19 Bee-otch of the Day: NRA


Bee-otch of the Day honors are awarded Monday through Thursday; Bee-otch of the Week is awarded Sunday morning on Chuck69.com.

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Name: National Rifle Association
Age: 148
Occupation: gun-loving kooks
Last Seen: Alexandria, VA
Bee-otched For: not allowing us to have good things
 
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Hey, New Zealand! Can we have your Prime Minister?

If there's anybody out there right now showing pure showmanship, it's definitely Jacinda Ardern. The fact that she's just 38 and is far more mature than our Cheeto in charge here in America should shame us. 

Now, in the aftermath of the mass shooting in her home country, Ardern is officially going to ban the weapons used to senselessly kill those poor people. And this after just ONE massacre like this one. Here in America, we've had Columbine, Sandy Hook, Las Vegas, Parkland and so on and semi-automatic guns are still legal. Only after the Vegas massacre were bump stocks made illegal by Drumpf.

Sadly, the NRA has long reared their ugly heads, buying out politicians right and even left. They cry that for every sicko gunman out there, there's millions more good people with guns. They think that the best defense is for everybody to own a gun and take them everywhere. That's where I cry bullshit.

You know, the whole world hates us, plain and simple. The asshole who committed this sick crime LOVED Drumpf and used him as an excuse to carry on this travesty. While countries like New Zealand are moving forward, we're moving backward because of Drumpf and the bigots who love him. And the NRA's on their side.

This is why we need people like Bernie Sanders and Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez to run this country. We need stronger gun laws so it takes longer for one to buy a gun. We need mental exams for each purchase of a gun and for guns to be properly locked away from those who shouldn't use them. Our lives should not be in the hands of the NRA, plain and simple.

Only in America where gun laws change when Drumpf's supporters are involved.

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Wednesday, March 20, 2019

3.20.19 Bee-otch of the Day: WOOD-TV's Storm Team 8


Bee-otch of the Day honors are awarded Monday through Thursday; Bee-otch of the Week is awarded Sunday morning on Chuck69.com.

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Name: WOOD-TV 8
Age: 70
Occupation: west Michigan's NBC affiliate
Last Seen: Grand Rapids
Bee-otched For: having climate change deniers on staff
 
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Well, I think the worst is over.

This past winter was one of the worst in my humble opinion. In terms of my car, I had to replace the brake line and bearings that run the traction system. People around me were getting very sick because of the record cold temps and so on.

I did check the extended forecast and it's in the 40s this week. The snow is finally melting and soon, we will be sneezing our asses off.

Recently on NBC's The Today Show, Al Roker announced that within 100 years the price of beer might be going up severely. Why? It's because the hops needed to make beer would be prohibitive to grow in warmer climate, translating into less beer.

A few years ago, NBC received flack from critics such as Bill Maher and others for only spending five minutes on the YEAR talking about climate change. Now, they've gotten the message. Many have lauded Chuck Todd for spending a whole hour on Meet the Press talking about climate change. He even banned climate change deniers on the show because the evidence is there. Plus, most deniers are simply pulling shit out of their ass.

Just like WOOD-TV 8 meteorologist Old Man Steffen.

Steffen has personally been a CC denier for years. It doesn't help that morning weathergirl Terri TheWhore is good pals with the Devos family. You know, weather people are supposed to study the weather and its effects on the Earth. But when they ignore the warnings of scientists - you know, real ones - their credibility is torn to shreds.

Now, I'm not sure about the other two weather folks at 8, though Ellen Bacca admits on her Twitter page that she's a Christian. Now, if she's the type of Christian that believes that Jesus helped the poor and sick or believes that the earth is flat and only 6,000 years old is beyond me. I hope it's the helped the poor part. Bear in mind, too that ex-WOOD-TV weathergirl Whora Velesquez - who lovingly dumped me on Facebook for no good reason - now works for Accuweather. Sadly, that company is owned by - surprise, surprise - a CC denier.

Today, it snowed here in Grand Rapids and it's the first day of Spring. This is not normal. With the brutal winter we had, the last thing we need is some wackjob telling us that the sky's not falling and that all's well.

The truth is that we need protection. We need to keep our environment safe and we need limits on how much pollution cars kick out and so forth. Our Earth is dying and it's sad that two out of the four weather loons on WOOD-TV could care less.

The good news is that both Old Man Steffan and Terri TheWhore are seniors and will have to retire sooner or later.

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Bee-otch of the Day is a production of Chuck69.com, Grand Rapids' site for Stern, politics and more!

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Tuesday, March 19, 2019

3.19.19 Bee-otch of the Day: the US government

Bee-otch of the Day honors are awarded Monday through Thursday; Bee-otch of the Week is awarded Sunday morning on Chuck69.com.

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Name: The US Government
Age: 243
Occupation: the people who control you and me
Last Seen: Washington, DC
Bee-otched For: killing a Dick
 
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These past few weeks have not been good to rock 'n roll.

Last week, legendary drummer Hal Blaine died at age 90. Along with the ultra-talented group of studio musicians known as The Wrecking Crew, he was behind the kit on thousands of recordings. As a matter of fact, he played on 40 #1 hits. Are you familiar with The Beach Boys' "Good Vibrations", "The Sound of Silence" by Simon and Garfunkel or "Love Will Keep Us Together" by the Captain and Tennille? Well, he was the drummer on all those.

Also passing was David White, one of the members of the 1950s doo-wop group Danny and the Juniors. He was 79 when he died on Sunday. He was an accomplished songwriter who co-wrote the group's big 1958 #1 hit "At The Hop" and "Rock 'n Roll Is Here To Stay". He also wrote a great share of other golden oldies like Len Berry's "1-2-3" and Lesley Gore's female empowerment anthem "You Don't Own Me".

While Blaine and White weren't necessarily household names, at least Dick Dale was somewhat more-familiar. The 1960s surf rock legend died on Saturday at age 81 from heart and kidney failure. During his 1960s heyday, he made over a million dollars per year, though he never had a hit single. In 1994, his career was resurrected thanks to his signature song, "Miserlou" being used as the theme song to the cult motion picture classic "Pulp Fiction". A whole new audience discovered Dale, who fell into obscurity.

Now, when people well past their prime are still performing at their age, some would say that they do it for the love of performing. Well, in Dale's case, it was because of one thing: he needed the money.

In 1965, Dale was diagnosed with colorectal cancer. He recovered, though he was broke because of the medical bills. He retired from performing, focusing on business deals that eventually cost him everything. When he recorded "Pipeline" with fellow guitar virtuoso Stevie Ray Vaughn in 1987, he was living in an RV. Right around that time, he had another bout with the same cancer. Only this time, he was fitted with a colostomy bag.

In other words, he pooped out of his stomach.

Dale lived a life that would please most doctors. He never smoked, drank or did drugs. He even stopped eating red meat in the 1970s. But yet, it wasn't enough for him to prevent two bouts of cancer. And did he pay the price dearly.

Toward the end of his life, Dale proclaimed that he was paying $3,000 per month for his medical expenses on top of the insurance that he was already paying for. And when he performed, he was in severe pain. He dealt with diabetes, renal failure and a broken vertebrae.

You know, it's sad when you've worked all your life and something comes up and BAM! you're stuck working until you die. That's the sad story of Dick Dale. As a matter of fact, he had concert dates all throughout the year.

This is why I think it's time we have universal healthcare in America. Time to stop judging people on preexisting conditions and assuming that they can't poop out of their asshole anymore because they had too many hits of LSD in the 1960s. If Canada, Australia, Germany, Japan, the UK and others have it, why can't we? Oh, I see! It will put the health insurance industry out of business! If you get sick, then that means they get to profit and find sinister ways to do so.

The only way we can get universal healthcare in America to be a reality is if we can get real progressive leaders to run our government. We need more AOCs and less Pelosis, more Bernies and less Hillarys. We need people, not corporations running our damn government!

And if universal healthcare was a reality, Dick Dale *MIGHT* have had a better life.

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CHUCK69.COM IS ALWAYS ON!

Monday, March 18, 2019

3.18.19 Bee-otch of the Day: Donald Trump

Bee-otch of the Day honors are awarded Monday through Thursday; Bee-otch of the Week is awarded Sunday morning on Chuck69.com.

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Name: Donald Trump
Age: 72
Occupation: Cheeto
Last Seen: Washington, DC
Bee-otched For: spreading his disease
 
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On Friday, America woke up to hear about another senseless incident of gun violence.

A monster went into two mosques in Christchurch, New Zealand and opened fire. The death toll now stands at 50. The perpetrator was a fan of Drumpf and lauded him for bringing more power to the Aryan race worldwide.

This was one of the worst shootings in New Zealand's history. This happened in a country where buying a gun is tougher than it is in other countries, especially here in America. In New Zealand, gun buyers must pass a psychiatric exam and allow the police in their homes to make sure their guns are safe from children.

This weekend, my mom and I had a discussion on the gun laws in New Zealand. She asked that if Chicago had tough gun laws, then why are they still one of the most-violent cities in America? The answer, sadly, is simple: towns bordering The Windy City have lax gun laws. There's also gun show loopholes. New Zealand is an island, so it's difficult for one to go someplace else to get a gun.

The sad thing is that tough gun laws for one city won't work. We need tougher gun laws in America NOW. But as long as Drumpf is president, it won't happen.

But the real winner here is New Zealand's prime minister, Jacinda Ardern. After the attacks, she wore a hijab and proclaimed that "they are us". She's also calling for tougher gun laws in her country. The interesting thing about her is that she's just 38 and a woman.

You know, folks, it's funny that we're so fucking behind other countries. They get it right, but not us. They have excellent healthcare while we spend trillions on war. Our nation's young adults are ass-deep in college loan debt while in other countries, college is free. Here, we have mass shootings at our schools and while there's hardly any school violence in other nations, those kids who call for tougher gun laws are called "libtards". Overseas, nudity on TV is celebrated, but here, it's an investigation by the FCC. I can go on and on.

Folks, this is why it sucks that we can't elect a true progressive as president. The Dems had their chance with Bernie, but fucked it up. Now, we have a racist, womanizing asshole running this once great nation. And sadly, his disease is spreading around the world.

When will we learn?
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Thursday, March 14, 2019

3.14.19 Hero of the Day: my great aunt


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Bee-otch of the Day honors are awarded Monday through Thursday; Bee-otch of the Week is awarded Sunday morning on Chuck69.com.

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A SPECIAL HERO OF THE DAY!


Name: my great aunt
Age: was 95
Occupation: retired schoolteacher
Last Seen: up in the heavens
Awarded For: being a great great-aunt
 
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Yes, I need to be personal again for today, so forgive me.

I know, I've been talking about my family a lot as of late. Last year, both my maternal grandmother and her daughter, my aunt died within two months and a day of each other. Their deaths have rocked my family and even helped separate us further from each other. 

Now, it's my great aunt who has climbed over the Rainbow Bridge. 

She was my grandmother's older sister and the last surviving member of her side of the family. She spent the last years of her life bedridden and in severe pain. She never had children of her own, but her nieces and nephews and their children treated her with love and compassion.

Like her mother, my great aunt was a schoolteacher. She was married for a short time, but that ended in divorce. She had a female partner for many years that she took care of through thick and thin. She also took care of others as well, especially her youngest sister when she was dying of cancer.

When her partner died, she made the bold move back to Michigan after spending years in New Jersey. For many of us who only saw her on occasion, this gave us the golden opportunity to connect to her. She loved playing Bingo with the fellow residents in the senior home she and Grandma lived in. She also loved CNN, much to the ire of the Fox News fans in my family.

Last night, her 95-year journey on this mortal coil ended with one of her nephews - the son of the sister that died of cancer - holding her hand. For the first time in over 40 years, my Grandma's family is complete again in the Great Beyond. We will bury her and my Grandma's ashes Memorial Day weekend at our family plot in Howard City, 30 miles north of Grand Rapids.

Thank you, Auntie, and phone home.

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Bee-otch of the Day is a production of Chuck69.com, Grand Rapids' site for Stern, politics and more!

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Wednesday, March 13, 2019

3.13.19 Bee-otches of the Day: the entitled


BECOME AN AFFILIATE OF T-SHIRT HELL AND MAKE SOME MONEY!

Bee-otch of the Day honors are awarded Monday through Thursday; Bee-otch of the Week is awarded Sunday morning on Chuck69.com.

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Name: various
Age: various
Occupation: assholes
Last Seen: everywhere
Bee-otched For: entitling lazy mofos like their kids
 
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Last night, the top news story was about the celebrities and CEOs involved in a scandal that got their children into top schools.

Yep, kids who get to go to college all because mommy was on Full House or Desperate Housewives, two shows I could care less about because respectively, I'm not A) Stewart from Beavis and Butt-head or B) gay.

The news definitely sparking outrage from many, showing that no matter how big your career is, you're not above the law. Just because you have money doesn't mean to you can have your asshole wiped.

Take a look at my late aunt. She worked her way up to being a registered nurse while living in misery with her ex-husband, who was abusive. She finally divorced him and a few years later, she finally bought her first and only house. When she was dying of cancer, her two kids fought over her care. Their own lives with their own families were more important. As a matter of fact, her daughter was here in Michigan visiting her husband's family as she was losing her cancer battle. Her excuse? "We'll come back next month to see her!" She died only weeks later. And then, her son forced her over to his house after he got into a feud with the doctor taking care of her without clothes and most importantly, her meds. While she was at her son's, she had a seizure and never really recovered.

When my aunt died, her two kids - who basically spat at her when she was dying - were entitled to her estate. What's even worse is that neither of them worked real jobs in their lives. Her daughter's last job was working in a tanning salon her now-husband owned. She's now a housewife. Her son only had odd, low-paying jobs until he met his wife in of all places, a Catholic church. I just heard this week that they now live in a five-bedroom home on a lake just outside Detroit.

You see, I hate people who have never done much with their lives and make more than I do. In June, I've worked 17 years at my current job and the first ten years there was a struggle because of my ex-boss. He was anti-raise and turnover at my job was sky high. I didn't get a raise for 10 years and people often asked me why I still lived in the dumpy apartment after all those years. The reason was plain and simple. In the 00s, the price of everything went up while my pay was abhorrent. I felt humiliated, but then again, this was the handiwork of some of the biggest entitled people out there: the Baby Boomers. They elected Reagan, who in turn spat on the middle class, fucked over the unions and in turn created an uncertain future for those in my generation and younger.

Let's face it: if you graduated high school in 1979, you instantly got a job and college was cheap. For me in 2001, I graduated high school with honors and then graduated from a small tech school. When I did, I couldn't get a real job until I got the job I have now in 2002. And don't make me tell you the hell I went through to get to where I am now.

My life's not perfect. I'm not rich, I work over 40 hours a week and I'm single at 37. My last so-called girlfriend cheated me out of a lot of money to fuel her drug habit. She almost got me fired from my job because she was taking my car and phone away from me, causing co-workers to give me rides. Even worse, I just had to ditch an asshole who was simply making my life miserable. He was begging me for money and just asked me to loan him $500. Not. Gonna. Happen. As-is, he has no job, no car and lives in a section eight apartment.

The college scandal reminds me of the King of the Hill episode where Peggy gets lambasted for flunking a star football player, causing him to miss several games. People need to be judged on how hard they work, not sitting around and being privileged. The people involved in the college scandal need to rot in prison for ruining so many peoples' lives. Besides, their kids are wealthy enough thanks to mommy and daddy.

Maybe, just maybe, the next overly-entitled person to be knocked down is a certain somebody who has been a millionaire since he was a kid. Just don't ask for any help from Nancy Pelosi.

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Got a Bee-otch to nominate? E-mail us @ chuck69dotcom@gmail.com. All suggestions (except for me) are welcome!

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Bee-otch of the Day is a production of Chuck69.com, Grand Rapids' site for Stern, politics and more!

CHUCK69.COM IS ALWAYS ON!

Tuesday, March 12, 2019

3.12.19 Bee-otch of the Day: Nancy Pelosi


Bee-otch of the Day honors are awarded Monday through Thursday; Bee-otch of the Week is awarded Sunday morning on Chuck69.com.

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Name: Nancy Pelosi
Age: 78
Occupation: Speaker of the House
Last Seen: Washington, DC
Bee-otched For: being a DINO
 
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When the House re-elected Nancy Pelosi as Speaker once again, I cringed.

After all, this is the same Nancy Pelosi who told us all that George W. Bush wasn't worth impeaching. The end result is that he's a free man in America while he's wanted around the world for war crimes.

Now, as I predicted, she's giving Drumpf the same fucking treatment.

On Monday, Skeletor announced that she did not want to impeach Drumpf. In a statement, she claimed that she wanted bipartisan support and that "he's just not worth it".

She also said that impeachment of Drumpf would split the country. OH, REALLY?!?

Look, Drumpf's approval rating is 37%. His staff's all going to jail and he'll probably be heading there himself. This is the reality of having moderates run our government. They don't do a damn thing as long as their donors make them their puppets. I'll betcha that Stretchface Nancy is being funded by the right to stop impeachment of Drumpf. If somebody like AOC was running the show, Drumpf might have been out of office by now, or even better, executed.

Democrats: making the same fucking mistakes since 2000.

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Got a Bee-otch to nominate? E-mail us @ chuck69dotcom@gmail.com. All suggestions (except for me) are welcome!

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CHUCK69.COM IS ALWAYS ON!