Bee-otch of the Day: November 2019

Tuesday, November 26, 2019

11.26.19 Bee-otch of the Day: Shoe Dept./Shoe Show

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Bee-otch of the Day honors are awarded Monday through Thursday; Bee-otch of the Week is awarded Sunday morning on Chuck69.com.

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Name: Shoe Dept./Shoe Show
Age: 59
Occupation: shoe store
Last Seen: Concord, NC
Bee-otched For: being another Jebus freak operation

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t's no secret that going to the mall is quickly becoming a thing of the past.

In the past several years, dozens of malls have shuttered and many more have been redeveloped into everything from outdoor shopping centers, colleges, churches and hospitals. Sadly, many blame e-commerce on the demise of the mall, though in many cases, malls meet their maker simply because of other factors. Many of them include being too close to other malls and even crime.

Another reason for a mall's failure is its owner. There are some companies out there famous for having a portfolio of dead malls. One is Las Vegas-based Moonbeam Investments. One of their most-famous malls was Century III Mall, just outside Pittsburgh. The mall was closed earlier this year after the local fire department deemed the 1.2 million square-foot structure as unsafe because of multiple code violations. Many in the retail community have criticized Moonbeam and other mall operators for owning them simply as tax write-offs.

But, don't throw Brookfield Properties into the mix.

They own several malls here in Michigan; many of them are quite successful, like Rivertown here in Grand Rapids and Crossroads Mall near Kalamazoo. My childhood mall, Grand Traverse Mall in Traverse City, however, has had its challenges.

The good news is that in the past decade, they've gained many big-name stores, namely GAP, Old Navy, H&M and Dunham's Sports. However, losing Foot Locker, Journey's, Express, PacSun, plus bankrupt retailers Payless ShoeSource and Charlotte Russe have created challenges of filling vacancies in the 27-year-old mall. Losing its nine-screen movie theater when former owner Carmike opened a new 14-screener just down the street was also a blow to the mall.

For years, its biggest embarrassment has been its nearly-empty Target wing. While one side is now filled by the giant Dunham's, there's a line of gated-up shops on the opposite side. Some of those stores like Spencer's have moved to newer stores in other parts of the mall. Others, like Coach House Gifts and a dollar store have long abandoned the mall.

Now, the rolling tumbleweeds in front of the mall's Target will soon disappear, thanks to a new redevelopment.

It was recently announced that a fast-growing chain of shoe stores will remodel 10,000 square feet of space in the Target wing, according to Garfield Township. The Traverse Ticker revealed the developer as Shoe Show, a North Carolina-based chain of shoe stores that also operate under the such names as The Shoe Dept., Burlington Shoes and Shoebilee!

Judging by its size, it is likely that their Grand Traverse Mall location will be a Shoe Dept. Encore. Other shoe stores at the mall include Famous Footwear and Finish Line.

Shoe Show has over 1150 locations including two Shoe Dept.s in Alpena and Gaylord.

Now, as somebody who spent a sizable chunk of my youth at GTM, I should be happy that Brookfield is getting some new stores in there. But sadly, one should steer clear of The Shoe Dept. and its other nameplates.

The reason? They give a lot to several right-winged causes in their neck of the woods. They give to several anti-abortion groups, a Baptist college that has publicly bashed the LGBTQ+ community and even the Salvation Army. The chain is owned by 81-year-old Robert Tucker, who founded Shoe Show in 1960.

Here in Grand Rapids, the area's three indoor malls, the aforementioned Rivertown Crossings, the recently-remodeled Woodland Mall and the ghetto Rogers Plaza all have a Shoe Show or Shoe Dept. As a matter of fact, even though they already have a Shoe Dept., Rivertown gained a Shoe Show recently where Payless used to be. Apparently, Shoe Show is banking on Payless' downfall on their potential growth.

Sadly, I've bought shoes from Shoe Dept. before and they weren't very comfortable. My last pair of shoes from them - Skechers, mind you - had their soles disintegrate not even a week after I bought them! I wonder if they buy their stock dirt cheap.

The point is, I really don't trust businesses that put false morals in front of their customers. Hell, I'm almost shocked that Shoe Dept.'s stores are all open Sunday! Nonetheless, they are the Chick-fil-A of the shoe world, and that's not a compliment.

I think my next pair of shoes will come from DSW, which thankfully supports the Democrats. I'll use those shoes to kick Shoe Dept.'s ass.

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Monday, November 25, 2019

11.25.19 Bee-otch of the Day: Detroit Lions

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Bee-otch of the Day honors are awarded Monday through Thursday; Bee-otch of the Week is awarded Sunday morning on Chuck69.com.

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Name: Detroit Lions
Age: 80
Occupation: pussies
Last Seen: Detroit, MI
Bee-otched For: being a purrfect example of failure

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It's been almost 400 years since the first Thanksgiving was held here in the United States.

A group of pilgrims set asail onto the Mayflower in hopes of finding a new world to escape religious rule. They befriended the natives and created a sense of respect and unity. Since then, we've acknowledged their friendship based on trust and gratitude.

Thanksgiving has long been a holiday where we express our thanks for the good things in life. We enjoy our yearly tradition of being with family and good food, and for us Michiganders, watching the annual Detroit Lions Turkey Day game.

In a somewhat ironic turn, the 3-6-1 Lions played The 1-9 Washington Redskins on Sunday. It should have been an easy win for the Lions, given the 'Skins' lousy season. But thanks to abhorrent backup QB Jeff Driskel getting sacked and throwing interceptions all over the place at the end of the game Sunday, The Redskins won, 19-16. It was the 'Skins' first home win since October of last year. It was also the Lions' fourth-straight loss and seventh out of eight games.

What's funny is that for years, Native Americans have all begged the NFL and the Washington team to eliminate the Redskins name. They claim that it's a slur against them and it's just as offensive as the N-word is to blacks. If real lions could speak, they should tell the NFL that it's time for the Detroit team to change its name, too. Lions are supposed to be strong, powerful kings of the jungle. The Detroit Lions are so weak that they can make Bert Lahr's character from "The Wizard of Oz" look like George C. Scott from "Patton". They should be renamed the Detroit Pussies, but vaginas everywhere would find that offensive, too.

It's amazing that just a few short years ago, the Lions made it to the playoffs. However, it's heartbreaking that team GM Bob Quinn fired the best head coach the team had in over 50 years, Jim Caldwell, simply because he wanted to turn the Lions into his old team, the New England Patriots. So, he hired longtime Patriots Defensive Coordinator Patricia Matthew in hopes of taking the Lions to the next level.

Instead, the Lions are so bad that they're making the Bears look good.

What's tragic is that when her husband died, team owner Martha Ford took the Lions by the horns and proved that she could be a better owner than him. When the team went 1-7 at the beginning of the season in 2015, she cleaned house. At the end of the season, they went 6-2, though they missed the playoffs. Caldwell was canned in 2017 despite going 9-7. Now, he's the assistant coach for the lowly Miami Dolphins, a lose-lose for everybody.

Without a doubt, It's now time for 94-year-old Ms. Ford to clean house again. With the Turkey Day game looming against Da Bears, I would imagine a lot of Detroiters rooting for Chicago. The current incarnation of the Lions is simply like watching a preview for a new movie where they say "from the producers of (insert awesome movie or TV show here)". But when the movie's released, it's the biggest pile of horseshit one has ever seen in their lives. The Lions are coached by the longtime Defensive Coordinator of the Super Bowl-winning Patriots. But, the Lions are playing like... the Lions.

The Detroit Lions: rebuilding since 1957.

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Thursday, November 21, 2019

11.21.19 Bee-otch of the Day: the media

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Bee-otch of the Day honors are awarded Monday through Thursday; Bee-otch of the Week is awarded Sunday morning on Chuck69.com.
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Name: the media
Age: ageless
Occupation: informers and entertainers of the general public
Last Seen: everywhere
Bee-otched For: Bernie? Who's that?

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Yesterday, I was on Facebook and read a very thought-provoking post by Michael Moore.

He talked about how the media is saying virtually nothing about Bernie Sanders. He's selling out every venue he appears at and is in the lead in the Iowa polls. Yet, they all claim that either Grandpa Biden or Elizabeth Warren is in the lead, simply because in the great words of Paul Harvey, "exit polls are the crack cocaine of politics".

Moore brought up the fact that Disney didn't want people to see his 2004 docupic "Fahrenheit 9/11" because they were afraid that it would offend their conservative base. So, another company bought it, it finally got released and made over $222 million at the box office. Moore - 1, Mickey - 0. Well, the longer story was that '9/11' was supposed to be released through Miramax, a Disney subsidiary since 1993. Under its original owners, Miramax was one of the most-respected indie studios. However, when Disney bought it, they refused to release anything they thought was too controversial. "Kids" from 1995 was a prime example. In the case of "9/11", Disney simply ended up locking it in their vault - presumably next to "Song of the South" - but Moore didn't give up. Miramax's founders bought the film and the rest is history.

OK, so I failed to mention that Miramax was founded by Bob Weinstein and his disgraced brother, Harvey. Also, Moore and the Weinsteins had a falling out, which is partly why Moore chooses to release his movies through very, very tiny indies these days.

But yes, it's true. When people are denied something, it will create more demand for it. Kinda reminds me of the South Park episode where Cartman buys an amusement park and doesn't allow people to go there. However, lines start to form outside of the park and because of the cost of owning and maintaining the park, Cartman has no choice but to allow people in, whether he liked it or not.

To me, radio is like that, too. The reason I created this website and blog 20 years ago was because I was forced to live in northern Michigan. The dominant rock station, WKLT didn't give a shit about my generation. Want Rage Against the Machine, KoRn, Tool and others? Too bad. The station had to play their daily quota of shitty 70s butt rock from Styx, Eagles, Journey and Foreigner. Thankfully, there's now Rock 105 and 95-5, and they're starting to kick KLT's ass in the ratings! Not only that, KLT's owners from North Dakota are trying to sell the station. Shoulda done that 20 years ago when radio was worth a shit.

Look at WKLQ here in Grand Rapids: in 2002, their idiot general manager, Matt Hanlon fucked over that station royally by demoting Howard Stern to their shitty AM sister, WBBL 1340. In 2005, the station canned Stern altogether. Well, guess what? Stern's move to Sirius and 97.9 WGRD flipping to Active Rock delivered a one-two punch to KLQ.

Of course, GRD these days is, well, too boomer for my tastes. But since I have SiriusXM, plus Spotify on my phone, same here. People like me will revolt from the norm and go with something better.

Well, that's how I look at the media and their relationship with Bernie Sanders. They want him to lose simply because they're scared, period. They're scared that nasty 'ol Bernie will order the FCC to stop media mergers from happening. This means that companies like Disney couldn't buy 20th Century Fox so they can put 4:3 episodes of The Simpsons on their streaming service in a 16:9 ratio, cropping many jokes. This means that companies like Sinclair and others can't create fake companies to create mass duopolies and triopolies like they have here in Michigan in towns like Traverse City and Flint. This also means that if Bernie's president, we'll all be on a universal health plan, so no more Blue Cross/Blue Shield, Priority and other healthcare giants that pay big-time bucks for commercials.

The people have spoken. They don't want the media to tell them who to vote for. Bernie got FUCKED big time in 2016 by the DNC and they would love a repeat. After all, a bad president in the White House means easy jokes for SNL and late night comedians.

So, like Mr. Moore said, media, just keep your mouth shut. The people will decide.

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Wednesday, November 20, 2019

11.20.19 Bee-otch of the Day: Eddie Lampert

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Bee-otch of the Day honors are awarded Monday through Thursday; Bee-otch of the Week is awarded Sunday morning on Chuck69.com.

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Name: Eddie Lampert
Age: 57
Occupation: hedge fund manager
Last Seen: ??
Bee-otched For: getting Seared

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When people think of Marshall, Michigan, there's a lot to think about.

The town of seven thousand souls sits just 13 miles east of Battle Creek at the intersection of I-94 and I-69. It's known for its 19th century architecture and several museums.

It's also the home of a very special plaza.

In that shopping center, there's an AT&T cell phone store, an optometrist, Anytime Fitness, a Credit Union, a place that cashes checks, a Dollar Tree and a Rite Aid. On both ends of the plaza, there's two anchors. On the right end, there's a Family Fare Supermarket.

However, on the opposite end, there's something that's a part of history. The other anchor of that plaza is a Kmart.

But, it's not just any Kmart. As of the beginning of January, it will be the last Kmart in the whole state of Michigan.

Yep! Michigan's last Kmart isn't in the Detroit area, where the chain began in 1962 by Sebastian Spering Kresge as an offshoot of his chain of five and dime stores. It's not in northern Michigan, where in Interlochen, the local Arts Academy named an open air auditorium after Kresge. It's not in either Charlevoix nor Grayling, two towns nowhere near a Walmart or Meijer. It's not in Grand Rapids, Lansing or anywhere else in the Great Lakes State. It's in Marshall, a town that's big enough to support both Walmart and Meijer, but both are absent in the community.

As mentioned, Marshall's close to Battle Creek, whose main shopping mall, Lakeview Square is struggling. Many of the mall's stores, including FYE and Hot Topic - a store that usually does well even in struggling malls - have all left and all three of its anchors have left as well. Those stores were Macy's, JCPenney and -- GUESS WHO?!?! -- Kmart's corporate sibling, Sears.

By the beginning of 2020, there will only be 126 Sears and 70 Kmart stores left. PERIOD. And a lot of it had to do with the hedge fund dickwad known as Edward S. Lampert. Instead of investing in upkeep in his stores and making them competitive, he decided to penny pinch everything. In the end, Sears and Kmart stores ended up looking like they hadn't been updated since "Ice Ice Baby" was the #1 song on the pop charts. While the Walmarts and Meijers were having a field day, Sears and Kmart ended up in bankruptcy a year ago.

Since then, more stores have closed and time is running out for both Kmart and Sears. To some, it's amazing that they're still around, especially after Kmart's first bankruptcy in 2002. All Fast Eddie has done is fuck things up even worse, and in the end, even he's lost half of his wealth. He's worth about $1.1 billion, down from over $2 billion just a few years ago. Employees have said that he often blamed them for Sears and Kmart's demise over the past two decades. In reality, the fact that many of his stores were dirty, old and falling apart was the reason why shoppers went elsewhere.

The reality is simple: Sears and Kmart operated on an outdated business model. When I was young, if you wore Kmart clothes to school, you simply didn't fit in. I didn't wear Reebok Pumps or Nikes; my mom bought me shoes that had weird letters and numbers on the tongue, presumably the code for the sweatshop employee who stitched them together. The high school kids on my bus were nice enough to put me down because of the fact. Simply put, 90s kids HATED Kmart. Hell, I wanted to puke my guts out every time Rosie O'Donnell made a commercial for them aimed at kids. Nothing like being a target for bullying when the store you buy your clothes from hired a fat, irritating closet homosexual who had one of the worst daytime TV shows of the 1990s.

Over the years, Walmart, Meijer and others built more stores selling better quality products at reasonable prices. Kmart, OTOH, keeps selling no-name crap. Checking their electronics department online, the TV brands they have include AXESS, Trexonic and Supersonic (I'd imagine that the members of J.J. Fad would be calling their lawyers after reading this). I even remembered when they started selling Curtis Mathes TV sets in the 2000s; once upon a time, that company made some of the most-expensive TVs on the market. When Kmart sold them, it became a totally different story.

Only time will tell when Kmart and Sears will both die off. Sears still has a location here in Grand Rapids at Rivertown Crossings Mall. Their other location in Grand Rapids at Woodland Mall was demolished to make way for an expanded wing, plus a new Von Maur store. When Sears' Lansing location closes, they will still have stores in Livonia and Westland, both by Detroit. As I'm typing this, the two are in life support at Retail Memorial Hospital in the same ward where Toys 'R' Us, Payless Shoe Source, Circuit City, Montgomery Ward, Blockbuster Video and others met their fate. We've seen the nurse, and we all know what she would be saying. Hospice is definitely not an option. It's simply best to take Kmart and Sears deep into the woods with a shotgun and simply tell it that this is going to hurt them more than it's going to hurt us.

Eddie Lampert: a bigger asswipe than the Sears and Roebuck catalogs that once graced many an outhouse.

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Tuesday, November 19, 2019

11.19.19 Bee-otch of the Day: Salem Media

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Bee-otch of the Day honors are awarded Monday through Thursday; Bee-otch of the Week is awarded Sunday morning on Chuck69.com.

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Name: Salem Media
Age: 47
Occupation: right-winged pricks
Last Seen: Camarillo, California
Bee-otched For: don't like Trump? You're fired!

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Since the Fairness Doctrine was revoked in 1987 and the Telecommunications Act if 1996 was passed, it seems if you're working in the broadcast industry, you're no longer allowed to have an opinion.

With the uprising of companies like Sinclair, it's clear that if you counterpoint their values, your last show will be your last show. And it happened to a talk radio host in Denver recently.

Craig Silverman was a host at KNUS in Denver, a radio station owned by Salem Media. Last week during his show, Silverman started to rant about Drumpf. Mid-sentence, he was cut off the air and replaced with a repeat of The Hugh Hewlett Show, which is syndicated by Salem. Silverman claimed that he was fired for bashing Drumpf on his show. However, Salem later stepped out and claimed that he was fired for violating his contract.

Silverman was not the first Salem host to be canned for bashing the hopefully-soon-to-be-impeached president. Michael Medved's show was canceled in 2018 and was replaced with alt-right jerkoff and former Drumpf deputy assistant Sebastian Gorka. In 2016, Medved announced on his show that he would never support Drumpf. His show is still on the air in Seattle on Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints-owned KTTH and a small handful of stations.

You know, there's a reason why radio hosts are popular, and it's their opinion. If Rush Limbaugh opposed Drumpf, he'd still have a job tomorrow, though it would be bad news for the Orange Shitgibbon. As I mentioned last week and several other times, there was a popular talk radio host here in Grand Rapids, Darren Gibson who was fired from WPRR Public Reality Radio 1680 for bashing the Democrats and Hillary Clinton in 2016. However, the Democratic establishment had several closed door meetings that also involved fellow WPRR host Tyrone Bynum that led to his dismissal. The fact that the DNC pissed on Bernie Sanders and proved how corporate they've become shows that they deserved a tongue-lashing. But since it's been shown that the DNC doesn't care about their own voters, boom-shaka-laka, we get Drumpf.

When I think of the word "Salem", I think of two nasty things: witches and cigarettes. Salem Media is a far-right conservative company that also owns several Christian Contemporary radio stations called "The Fish". Many of their Talk stations are called "The Answer", which is a pathetic name since it's all right-winged BS.

Not long ago, the idiot who programs Salem's talk stations, Phil Boyce, defended his stations, even saying that he doesn't program to young people simply because they still live with their parents. "A 26-year-old who’s living on his parents’ couch in the basement, who’s more worried about his video games or watching porn, is not gonna listen to us. So why do we change, and go after him, and risk running off the ones that will come and listen to us?" OK BOOMER, IT'S BECAUSE OF FUCKTARDS LIKE YOU THAT YOU HELPED TO CREATE THAT GENERATION! You know, companies like Salem make it sound like that if you're not a fan of Drumpf, you're not a conservative. And if you love Jesus, you have to be a conservative. Sorry, but that's bullshit.

The reality is, is that Salem is to radio as Sinclair is to television. However, last time I checked, Salem's radio stations don't have ratings. Hell, if I'm not mistaken, their Detroit AM station - which also has Sean Hannity - doesn't even have a one share!

Talk radio in general is dying because of corporate media. If you talk on their airwaves, you better not say what they don't want you to say. If you go to a restaurant and the service sucks, you better not bash that joint because they're your sponsor, even if you don't know that they are. Maybe that's also why so many people have quit radio and have gone on to podcasting. Hell, some podcasters make more money doing so than working for the man. Hell, I'm a regular listener of Darren's show, Southpaws. Since he's off terrestrial radio - save for some Pacifica stations - he's more allowed to say whatever he wants, when he wants it.

If the only way to Heaven is to do things Salem's way, God help us.

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CHUCK69.COM IS ALWAYS ON!

Monday, November 18, 2019

11.18.19 Bee-otch of the Day: Kanye West

BECOME AN AFFILIATE OF T-SHIRT HELL AND MAKE SOME MONEY!

Bee-otch of the Day honors are awarded Monday through Thursday; Bee-otch of the Week is awarded Sunday morning on Chuck69.com.

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Name: Kanye West
Age: 42
Occupation: rapper
Last Seen: Houston, TX
Bee-otched For: causing a Ruckus

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Once upon a time, there was an awesome rapper named Kanye West.

He had great songs like "Gold Digger", "Flashing Lights", "Stronger" and "Niggas in Paris". He was a champion for the people, proclaiming that "George W. Bush doesn't care about black people" during a benefit for Hurricane Katrina victims.

And then, he put on a leather jacket, jumped on his Harley and jumped it over an above ground standing pool with a shark in it. After doing so, he stuck out his thumb and proclaimed, "eyyy!"

For starters, he married a golddigger, Kim Kardashian in 2014. Together, the two have four kids: North, Saint, Chicago and Psalm. And I thought Frank Zappa was the master of giving his kids weird names. But then, he decided to come out of the woodwork, dressed in a certain red hat.

That hat, of course read "Make America Great Again".

Because of this, Drumpf invited Ye to the White House where he talked up a storm to the orange cheeseball. But that wasn't the end of Kanye's descent into stupidity.

Recently, he recorded a Gospel Rap album called "Jesus is King". It debuted at #1 on the album charts despite mixed reviews from critics. As a matter of fact, it sold 264,000 units, making it the seventh-biggest debut album of this year so far. But guess what? Tool's "Fear Inoculum" did a helluva lot better in 6th place with 270k units sold. Of course, Tool's Maynard James Keenan is notorious for being anti-organized religion, especially since his mother was a religious turd.

Well now, Ye has really done it this time. This past weekend, he and his Sunday Service Choir appeared in front of 16,000 morons who showed up at Lakewood Church in Houston, TX, formerly the Summit Arena, the former home of the Houston Rockets NBA team. Allegedly, he was paid $300,000 to appear at the church, run by snot-nosed televangelist Joel Osteen. Osteen - who is worth an estimated $60 million - made headlines in 2017 when he refused to open his church to shelter those affected by Hurricane Harvey. Only after he received scrutiny from his critics that he opened the church up, covering his ass with "we had to keep our own people safe". Suuuuuure.

Now, Ye is calling himself a self-proclaimed billionaire, even though he's worth $250 million. Funny that he's also calling himself Christian because of, well, that little passage in the Bible where Jesus has a little talk with a rich young man that involves a camel going through the eye of a needle.

Kanye has turned himself into a near-carbon copy of Ruckus, the angry old black man from the comic strip and Adult Swim cartoon series The Boondocks. Rucks is a typical Uncle Tom who bows to whites and Republicans and is racist to his own kind. However, Ruckus is poor and, well, stupid.

To me, a celebrity who "finds Jesus" is surly going to have a downfall. Just ask Mel Gibson. IMHO, the days of Ye making good songs is over. Yes, he's gained some new fans in the Jebus freak market, but for any fan of his longing for his brand of sophisticated rap, we can all kiss those days goodbye. "Jesus is King" is the "St. Anger" of the rap world; but unlike Metallica, don't expect Ye to rebound.

Funny how this album gets released several weeks before Christmas. In the great words of Norm MacDonald, "happy birthday, Jesus! I hope you like crap!"

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CHUCK69.COM IS ALWAYS ON!

Thursday, November 14, 2019

11.12.19 Bee-otch of the Day: Bob Goodrich

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Bee-otch of the Day honors are awarded Monday through Thursday; Bee-otch of the Week is awarded Sunday morning on Chuck69.com.

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Name: Bob Goodrich
Ages: 79
Occupation: movie theater owner/owner WPRR
Last Seen: Grand Rapids, MI
Bee-otched For: proving that the wrong leadership is a bad idea

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The monthly Grand Rapids radio Nielsens are out, and there weren't many surprises.

B93, WCSG, WOOD-FM/AM, WSNX and WGRD all ruled the top five respectively. Star 105.7 and The River had ho-hum ratings, but expect that to change now that both are playing Christmas music around the clock.

And yes, the losers. Can't forget about 101.3 The Brew, Thunder 107.3, WBBL and good 'ol WPRR, Public Reality Radio 1680 and a bunch of low-powered FM translators.

WPRR only managed to pull a .1 this time around, tied with iheartradio's throwaway talker 1230 WTKG and two flea-power FMs from the Muskegon area.

What's more embarrassing is that WPRR is probably the last left-leaning talk station here in Michigan. Even worse is that in the overnight hours, the station now airs low-quality urban AC music that sounds like it was downloaded from Grokster 15 years ago.

But what do you expect from a radio station programmed by Tyrone Bynum?

Ah, yes, the same guy who ran WMFN 640 further into the ground over a decade ago. True, it had no ratings thanks to former owner John Shepard's dumb decision to flip the station from Sports Talk to Business and then to the only station in America to air both Loveline and Bill Bennett's shitty morning show (and let's not forget that they also aired The Greaseman's botched comeback into radio, too). When Tyrone ran the station, he made the idiotic decision to not air Detroit Tiger games on Sunday so he could air Gospel music and sleazebag preachers.

In the end, Tyrone ended up handing the Tigers over to WBBL and WLAV and the keys to 640 over to a Spanish group. The station's owners, Birach Broadcasting ended up moving 640 to a Chicago suburb.

Now, Bynum is running WPRR and hosting a daily show called The 99%ers. A very hypocritical name if you ask me, since he supposedly lives in a nice house in the ritzy Grand Rapids suburb of Ada. Plus, he's financially well off thanks to his teaching and law careers. Sadly, he got into that position by screwing over somebody far more progressive than him: Darren Gibson.

Gibson was the host of Southpaws, which aired twice weekly. He was also the station's manager. On his show in 2016, he told his audience that he would never support Hillary Clinton, especially after what the Democratic National Committee did to Bernie Sanders by forcing superdelegates to vote for Hillary. Well, Tyrone and certain members of the Kent County Democratic Party worked their power to get Gibson fired and they succeeded. And because of their "vote blue no matter who" attitude, Drumpf is in the White House.

Darren and Tyrone obviously did not get along. According to Darren, Tyrone often screamed at him until he started to cry and would always talk over him. Tyrone always had to have his way. In the end, Darren was fired and Tyrone became the station's manager.

Darren and I have had a few conversations about Tyrone and station owner Bob Goodrich, who also owns the Goodrich Quality Theatre chain. For starters, WPRR is being run like a non-profit with no commercials. Nowhere on the station's website does it mention that WPRR is a 501(c)(3) organization. Several years ago, Goodrich simulcasted the station on a tiny, 500-watt station in Pontiac, IL that he since sold off to a Catholic group. Now, I thought that in order to own a radio station on the non-commercial band (88.1 to 91.9), you had to be a 501(c)(3) group. Obviously, the man who owns one of the biggest cinema chains in America isn't really a charity.

Apparently, Gibson's not the only person that either Goodrich or Bynum fucked over. I've also talked with a woman who used to work at WPRR on a women's talk show and she described Goodrich as "an idiot who thinks he's a genius". Let's see: he fired the man who made WPRR what it was and hires in somebody who has to get his way because of his skin color. Makes perfect sense. Not only that, Tyrone's wife - who sounds like a chipmunk - also has her own show on the weekends. I remembered her when she was on WMFN subbing for Tyrone, and she had a woman from a local bank teaching people on how to start a checking account with them. REALLY?!?! Ya know, the late, great Dave Barber would always put those types of shows on blast by saying, "B-O-R.... I-N-G!"

It's sad that Grand Rapids only has three companies running 95% of all the radio stations in town. Of those three, only Townsquare has a station with African Americans with its full attention, and it's an FM translator of a weak AM station known as Magic 104.9. Yes, iheart's WSNX 104.5 (a station Goodrich once owned) has a slight rhythmic lean, but you gotta hear Billie Eilish, Ed Sheeran and Ariana Grande to get to Lizzo, Post Malone and Lil Nas X. And yes, don't get me started on Cumulus, whose portfolio is a mess.

The point is that west Michigan has a good percentage of African Americans. When corporate radio ignores them, you get good 'ol Tyrone on one of the smaller stations blasting away at Whitey. Yet, he kisses the Clintons' asses because he got to interview Bill many years ago while at WMFN. It's sad when somebody remains true to a political party and not an ideal. Yes, in my mind, anybody with an (R) after their name is an asshole. But, there's a lot of (D)s who are (D)icks and (D)ouchebags in real life. I didn't vote in the 2000 election because I didn't want to support Joe Lieberman as vice president. His M.O. was to get Howard Stern off the air. In the end, we got George W. Bush, who lied to us over 9/11 and led us into several trillion-dollar wars over oil. But since Hillary supported Dubya's wars, it was fodder to get Drumpf elected.

True, I'll give WPRR some credit for airing Stephanie Miller and Thom Hartmann's radio shows, which are two of the last-surviving leftist programs left on terrestrial radio. Otherwise, it's as useless as tits on a bull. Since Bob Goodrich is near 80 and has no intermediate family, I do wonder if there's a plan to sell the station and his other businesses. I hope Tyrone is not interested.

Maybe, just maybe, this is why Tyrone has two white daughters.

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CHUCK69.COM IS ALWAYS ON!

Monday, November 11, 2019

11.11.19 Bee-otch of the Day: anybody offended by the phrase "OK Boomer"

BECOME AN AFFILIATE OF T-SHIRT HELL AND MAKE SOME MONEY!

Bee-otch of the Day honors are awarded Monday through Thursday; Bee-otch of the Week is awarded Sunday morning on Chuck69.com.

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Name: various
Ages: 55-73
Occupation: various
Last Seen: everywhere
Bee-otched For: not being "OK" with "Boomer"

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For decades, we've been told not to call certain members of society slurs that might offend them.

But yet, many of us still think we have the right to scream those epithets at certain folks who piss us off. But now, there's a group of folks who have their own slur against them. A group who thought that they would be slur-less forever, but it wasn't meant to be: those born between 1946 and 1964.

And that slur is "OK Boomer".

Sources claim that it came from a viral video on the popular app TikTok. It made headlines last week when 25-year-old New Zealand lawmaker Chlöe Swarbrick was commenting on a bill regarding climate change. During her speech, an older member of Parliament started to taunt her, and she respectfully told the asshole "OK Boomer".

I've already seen so many boomers get pissed over that phrase they view as derogatory. After all, it does have the same rhythm as what the old lady told Clevon Little from "Blazing Saddles". Now, it's never nice to call a group of people a slur. But, the boomers are an exception.

You see, the baby boomers are the "Me Generation". They were spoiled growing up because their parents worked hard for them. The generation before the boomers were called "The Greatest Generation" for a reason. My grandparents were bonafide members of that group. My maternal grandfather's father died when he was nine years old, and growing up, he didn't have a true father figure. He served in the Navy in World War II and came home with shellshock, or PTSD as they call it today. He spent the rest of his life a heavy drinker, but he was one of the nicest men I've ever known. My paternal grandfather's parents divorced when he was young and his father - from what I've heard - was a jerk. But he also served in WWII and was married to the same woman, my grandmother for 49 years until he died. My grandmother grew up with polio and had trouble walking. But despite her disability, she was a dedicated special ed teacher and had seven kids. My grandparents grew up during the Great Depression and there were times when their meal was ketchup in boiling water.

Thanks to FDR, America saw a rebirth thanks to his New Deal and job-creating programs. The top-earning Americans all paid a 90% tax rate and it boosted the economy. The boomers in the 50s, 60s and 70s all lived happy lives. They went to school and went home every day at lunch time to watch Soupy Sales. If they lived in a small town and their local radio sucked, they can wait til sundown to hear 50 KW giants like WLS, CKLW, WCFL and so many others.

And then, Americans made an unholy mistake in 1980 when they felt that a celebrity who starred in a bunch of stupid movies with a monkey could run the country better than a peanut farmer.

Reagan cut the wealthy's tax rate to rock bottom levels, busted the unions and simply put, created a dismal world for us Gen-Xers, millennials and beyond. I had more education than my parents with a technical degree, and when it was time for me to enter the real world in 2001, I was fucked. Living in the boomer hell known as northern Michigan didn't help, either. And living with my asshole boomer stepdad made things worse.

You see, my Dad moved to Kentucky in 2000, leaving me to live with the asshole who helped destroy my family. He hated my guts, and pressured me to get my own place, even though I sure as hell couldn't afford it.

Thankfully in 2002, I got hired in at a place in Grand Rapids. My new boss - a boomer - told me that I would be getting a 10% raise per year. Well, that was a lie. Because of this, people on a message board I used to post on bashed me, calling me an "$8 per hour loser from Easttown". Sadly, society expected me to make a living wage by the time I was in my mid-20s. But thanks to our asshole boomer president, Dubya, I was lucky to even have a job and not live with my parents, whom at the time both lived out of state. Instead of giving us raises, my boss would occasionally give us Meijer gift cards and would throw us into meetings where he'd show some Dave Ramsey video or have people from a bank telling us how to save money. Basically, I was working harder than my parents and getting paid less than what they were making at my age. Thankfully, my ex-boss retired and my new boss - also a boomer - gave me mad raises every year.

Now, to be fair, not all boomers are bad people. This site was originally dedicated to my love of Howard Stern, a boomer. One of my blog's biggest fans and a man whom I email back and forth often is a boomer. As a matter of fact, he worked in radio 35 years ago and left his station after the owner busted their union. My favorite podcast is Southpaws, which is co-hosted by a man pushing 70, Jack Prince. And last but not least, Michael Moore. Many years ago on Larry King Live, a young caller talked about their financial problems. His response spoke volumes: "my generation owes your generation an apology".

Mr. Moore is 100% right. And what's sad is that his fellow boomers in northern Michigan - many of whom Repukes - love to bash him for being right. After all, this is the man who took two abandoned buildings in downtown Traverse City - the State Theatre and the Con Foster Museum, now the Bijou By The Bay - and brought new life back into them. He's done a helluva lot more for TC than a certain boomer who shall remain nameless who lovingly gave downtown a giant hole in the ground at the corner of Front and Park for most of the 2000s and ran several local radio stations into the ground.

Look, if you're a boomer and hate the phrase "OK Boomer", it's your goddamned fault. This is your punishment for the way you've treated my generation and the generations after me. I'm almost 40, still single and don't live in anything fancy. That's because I'm still trying to catch up from the BS I had to go through in my 20s. And ya know what? It's not my fault.

And guess what? OTHER BOOMERS ARE DEFENDING THAT SAYING! Abigail Disney, 59 is the granddaughter of Roy Disney, the brother of Walt. On her Twitter page, she stated on several tweets, "What the hell is wrong with you/us boomers?? When did you get so easily triggered? Face up to the fact that the world is changing fast but you are not. You are old. You are not irrelevant yet. But you are less relevant every day. And the more often you object to Millenials' understandable resentment toward a generation that has selfishly poisoned their water, blown past every climate warning so they could drive their stupid hummers, and looked away or worse for Sexual, racial and economic injustice, the more you prove their point that you just don't understand anything of value to them. Look, these kids are facing down a rising tide (literally) of changes that threatens everything you and I taught them to hold dear." She continued, "Oh, and does anyone remember not trusting anyone over 30??? Good lord I bet half of the nudniks complaining about youth disrespecting them were all over that freight train of prejudice and bad judgment. How about you guys sit the fuck down and let the kids drive. It's not like you've done such a great job with the time you have had. Get over the idea that all things pass, you are old and you need to let history do what history does: move on."

The sad reality is that boomers were given the world to them and they ended up telling their children to go fuck themselves. Ted Nugent is a shining example: when he was being drafted into the Vietnam War, she shit his pants in the draft office so he would have to be shipped out. Thirty years later, he blasted us young people for not wanting to go to fight Dubya's fake war. Sorry, but a douchebag who says shit like that and fucks a 16-year-old when he's in his 30s just shows how the words "OK Boomer" are important to a pig-fucking asshole like him.

Look, THIS IS WHY WE NEED BERNIE SANDERS IN THE WHITE HOUSE! Hell, he's not even a boomer; he was born in 1941! He saw how the boomers destructed their kids and their children's children's lives. Nobody - especially my age - should have to suffer through low wages, high college debt and an uncertain world because of climate change. If boomers don't want to be insulted, they'll have to learn that their generation will soon die off and my generation and others will soon take over.

As Trent Reznor once said, "bow down before the one you serve". Sadly, it's my generation that's getting what we don't deserve.

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CHUCK69.COM IS ALWAYS ON!

Wednesday, November 6, 2019

11.6.19 Bee-otch of the Day: Donald Trump

BECOME AN AFFILIATE OF T-SHIRT HELL AND MAKE SOME MONEY!

Bee-otch of the Day honors are awarded Monday through Thursday; Bee-otch of the Week is awarded Sunday morning on Chuck69.com.

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Name: Donald Trump
Age: 72
Occupation: asshole
Last Seen: Washington, DC
Bee-otched For: impeachment blues and browns

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At least one U.S. state has really grown a brain in three years.

Yesterday in Kentucky, Andy Beshear shocked the world when he was elected the new Democratic governor of Kentucky. It was a close race, with incumbent Republican Matt Bevin only losing by some 5,000 votes. Three years ago, Drumpf had a stranglehold on the state. With jobs disappearing in the Bluegrass State, it's apparent that even its residents - many of whom Southern Baptist - are saying that it's time for some new blood.

Drumpf did have a victory in Mississippi, though, where Tate Reeves was elected that state's new governor Tuesday night. On the 16th, Louisiana will see if John Bel Edwards will be reelected that state's governor. Despite being a Democrat, he is pro-life. As governor, he did sign into law a "heartbeat bill" banning abortion after 15 weeks of pregnancy. Maybe that's why he lost a jungle primary prior to the election. Edwards is going up against Eddie Rispone, a Christian conservative who was endorsed by Drumpf.

Meanwhile on the impeachment front, Drumpf apparently wanted AG Bill Barr to hold a press conference stating that he didn't do anything illegal in his communicating with Ukraine. Meanwhile, yesterday, one of Drumpf's witnesses, Roger Stone was forced to take the day off because of "food poisoning" and according to prosecutors, he lied to Congress.

The more I hear about Drumpf and his allies, the more I think about Nixon and how many of his folks ended up in jail. The best news of all this is that the 2020 presidential election will be held less than a year from now. However, yesterday, I was watching WOOD-TV here in Grand Rapids, and political reporter Rick Albin proclaimed that Joe Biden once again is the leader among the Democrats. Methinks that Albin - a Republican - WANTS Biden to take the nod simply because he's the most-corporate of the Democrats. And since real Democrats sure as hell won't vote for him, it's a win for Drumpf unless he's thrown out of office.

I expect that after the next debate, more people running for president will drop off, namely Pete Buttigieg and Amy Klohuchar. The Iowa caucuses are only three months away and it will be a trip from there.

Look, BERNIE SANDERS MUST WIN THE DEMOCRATIC PARTY NOMINATION. IF NOT, IT'S ANOTHER FOUR YEARS OF DRUMPF. We need a president that will restore our relations with our allies, give us universal healthcare, increase the minimum wage to $15 per hour and so much more. If not, 2008 will repeat itself.

To hell with food poisoning, Drumpf has shit on us all.

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CHUCK69.COM IS ALWAYS ON!

Tuesday, November 5, 2019

11.5.19 Bee-otch of the Day: World Wrestling Entertainment

BECOME AN AFFILIATE OF T-SHIRT HELL AND MAKE SOME MONEY!

Bee-otch of the Day honors are awarded Monday through Thursday; Bee-otch of the Week is awarded Sunday morning on Chuck69.com.

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Name: World Wrestling Entertainment
Age: 67
Occupation: sports entertainment corporation
Last Seen: Stamford, CT
Bee-otched For: broken wings

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As a fan of professional wrestling, I couldn't be more happier that the WWE is no longer a virtual monopoly.

It was a sad day when Vince McMahon bought out World Championship Wrestling from Time Warner nearly 20 years ago. It was at the zenith of the Attitude era, and it was all downhill from there. WWE expatriate Jeff Jarrett started TNA Wrestling - now Impact Wrestling - in 2002 in hopes of being the WWE's biggest competitor, but it did go downhill in recent years thanks to changes in channels and management. The show called Impact! is now seen Tuesday nights at 8 p.m. on the AXS Network, which is now owned by Impact parent Canadian-based Anthem Sports and Entertainment.

Anyway, for years, the WWE pretty much had the wrestling world to themselves. They had some competition in TNA/Impact (which once had Hulk Hogan and Rick Flair) and Ring of Honor (owned by mega-conservative broadcaster Sinclair). But in the past several months, Impact has been beefed up thanks to Anthem buying AXS, returning Impact to a more-respectable TV home. Then, there's the 71-year-old National Wrestling Alliance, which is owned by Billy Corgan of the Smashing Pumpkins. And oh, yes, All Elite Wrestling, owned by the Khan family, which owns the NFL's Jacksonville Jaguars.

When AEW signed with TNT, it was the first time in some 15 years that the WWE was given real, legitimate competition. The WWE should be shaking in their boots, but good 'ol Vince McMahon is making the same, fucked-up mistakes over and over.

Last week, the WWE flew to Saudi Arabia for a pay-per-view event called Crown Jewel. Part of the reason for the event is that the WWE is quite popular over there. Since the McMahon family are a bunch of fucking Repukes and doing business with the enemy is something they love to do, well, let's say that their Crown Jewel event turned into broken glass pretty quickly.

Sources claim that the Saudi government owe the WWE somewhere around $500 million, and it led to a giant smackdown between the two parties. As a result, Vince McMahon allegedly cut the feed of Crown Jewel to Saudi Arabian audiences.

Well, things got out of hand. After the PPV ended, McMahon and his posse took his private jet back to Connecticut. WWE Champion Brock Lesnar, his sidekick and Raw executive producer Paul Heyman, Hulk Hogan, Rick Flair and Jimmy Hart all took a jet chartered by Lesnar. The rest of the WWE cast and crew, well, that's a totally different story.

Allegedly, Saudi Crown Prince Mohammad bin Salman sent out military police to force the other wrestlers off the plane and to stand on the tarmac for several hours. After those hours passed, the passengers were allowed to board the jet to return home. As a result, the WWE was forced to use superstars from their NXT brand to take over for the absent wrestlers on Smackdown! the next evening.

(And surprise! That episode of Smackdown! had higher-than-average ratings that evening.)

According to the WWE, they claimed that the wrestlers' plane had mechanical issues. They even urged the stranded wrestlers to post on social media videos proving that mechanical issues were grounding them. However, there were others who claimed that they would never go to Saudi Arabia ever again. And needless to say, Vince better be shitting his britches.

The reality is that wrestling fans are loyal to the "sport" (and yes, it's fake, but still fun to watch) and are fucking tired of the milquetoast bullshit that McMahon has been producing since the TV-PG era began. But thankfully, the Khans, Billy Corgan, Anthem Sports and Entertainment and others have listened. With what Vince did 35 years ago by spitting on his father's grave by breaking up the territories and other shenanigans he's pulled over the years, I'm happy that he's got competition. The fact that he's also one of Drumpf's good buddies also hurts him big time.

Of course, some good news has come from all this, and it's the fact that Saudi Arabia has given the WWE $60 million to help pay their debts to the corporation. The WWE plans to do two events per year in the oil-rich nation for the next eight years.

But with the excess competition, WILL the WWE last another eight years?

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CHUCK69.COM IS ALWAYS ON!

Monday, November 4, 2019

11.4.19 Bee-otch of the Day: Judy Rose

BECOME AN AFFILIATE OF T-SHIRT HELL AND MAKE SOME MONEY!

Bee-otch of the Day honors are awarded Monday through Thursday; Bee-otch of the Week is awarded Sunday morning on Chuck69.com.

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Name: Judy Rose
Age: was 80
Occupation: dead
Last Seen: hell
Bee-otched For: being one of the biggest cunts in Grand Rapids history

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I know, I know. It's never nice to spit on the dead.

It's never nice to wish cancer or a disease on somebody, even if it's your worst enemy.

But sometimes, there are exceptions.

Last week, I was writing on the mayoral election in Grand Rapids, which is tomorrow. I asked myself, "what happened to Judy Rose?" Well, a Google search discovered that she died in March.

Funny how that when Judy Rose died, the media never really paid attention to her passing. After all, she was viewed as a community leader as the president of the Black Hills Citizens for a Better Community. Black Hills is one of Grand Rapids' toughest neighborhoods, and Judy, let's say, was like Clint Eastwood's character in "Gran Torino"; they were the only white folks in their neighborhood when people of color moved in.

So why am I happy that this old bitch died? Because of her, Grand Rapids no longer has strip clubs.

That's right! In 2006, when a hybrid full-nude and topless club opened called Showgirl Galleria, Rose raised thousands of dollars to challenge the city's nudity laws. To make matters worse, she got the city's then-future Democratic mayor and then-city commissioner, Rosalynn Bliss to side with her. A long-standing rumor had it that Rose got a lot of her funding from the Devos family since she appeared in one of Dick Devos' gubernatorial campaign ads that year.

Since the anti-nudity laws passed, two topless clubs, Sensations and Parkway Tropics are now bikini clubs, the full-nude Red Barn closed and Showgirl Galleria has been demolished for overpriced luxury apartments.

Guess what? THERE'S NO FUCKING LINK BETWEEN CRIME AND STRIP CLUBS!!! Look at Traverse City: hardly any crime and there's a full-nude club called Fantasy's that does quite well. Hell, there's another club, Crossroads in Rapid City that's been a topless club for decades. Yeah, TC has its problems, but nothing like Grand Rapids. Another lie is that strip clubs are hellholes for prostitution. SURPRISE! THE RESTAURANT INDUSTRY HAS MORE PROSTITUTES THAN THE STRIP CLUB INDUSTRY! Since waitresses live on tips, sometimes, they don't get any, especially if they give somebody lousy service. So, if it's 3 a.m. in the morning and she had a rough night, yep, she'll follow people out who didn't tip and offer them a BJ or even go home with them. Trust me, I have friends who have worked in the strip club industry and know this as a fact.

The sad thing is that since the strip club laws passed, crime in Grand Rapids has SKYROCKETED. Several years ago, there was a shooting in an abandoned business in a plaza. I'm a regular customer at one of the businesses in that building. A few weeks ago, I went there and one of the front counter people was on the phone talking about one of the neighboring businesses in that plaza and how it's a front for somebody's drug-dealing business. He was talking about how they've been busy trying to move out for some time because of the fact that there's been a lot of questionable activity there. Well, guess what? On Saturday night, another party happened there and more gunshots rang out. A 31-year-old father of (ugh) 13 CHILDREN was the 14TH HOMICIDE THIS YEAR IN GRAND RAPIDS.

I KNOW!!! STRIP CLUBS ARE THE PROBLEM..... NOT! Yeah, like I want to kill somebody because I saw boobs. Kinda like how the cannabis was portrayed in "Reefer Madness" over 80 years ago.

You know, I'll never forget Judy's words in response to strippers potentially losing their jobs: "maybe they should find better jobs." You know, it was 2006 and the economy sucked. I remembered the job I had at the time and the shitty pay I was getting. Then again, I was lucky to even have a job, since my cousins at the time were all living with their parents. You look at the fact that too many college students today graduate with massive amounts of debt. Being a stripper is the only way to pay off that debt in record time. To me, it only shows how soulless she was. I'd also imagine that if she was still alive, she would probably proclaim that we need to send all the blacks back to Africa. As somebody whose mother's boyfriend is African American and is one of the smartest men I've ever known, I would beg to differ.

It's amazing that her obituary stated that she was "reborn" in 1944 and talked about her walk with Jesus. You know, Jesus hung out with worse folks than actual strippers. You know, PROSTITUTES. They say to be more like Jesus, and there you go!

There's a reason why I support strip clubs, folks. When I was a kid, I was bullied a lot, mainly by older kids for being chubby. There was a fat girl who was a grade younger than I was and had hygiene issues. She smelled worse than a barn. If I had a new yearbook, these assholes would steal it. In the autographs section, they would vandalize it with "C+W" (as in Chuck + the girl's initial). One time, the "C+W"s were so bad that I had to get a new copy of my yearbook with the autographs kept blank.

When I was eight days shy of my 12th birthday, my parents separated. My Mom and I ended up living with a nasty, 400-lb. woman who turned out to be a prostitute. I never felt comfortable around her, period. Being in a small town never helped, either since everybody knew where I lived.

Throughout my school years, I had hoped for a girl to like me for who I was. Often, I went to school dances with no girl wanting to dance with me during slow dances. To make matters worse, I had no choice but to take a fat trailer trash ho to the prom. It was one of the most-embarrassing experiences in my life.

But then, I graduated and moved to this area. I was talking with somebody who was going to Deja Vu in Kalamazoo and he was I think 19. I asked him, "don't you gotta be 21?" He told me that you only have to be 18 to enter since they don't serve alcohol and they're full-nude. I went there, and for the first time as an adult, I felt respected by women around my age. I look back and wished I knew about Deja Vu as a senior in high school. Instead of dragging a big, fat, ugly pile of Pentecostal trailer trash to the prom, I should have gone to Deja Vu and come back to school that Monday wearing a Deja Vu shirt. It would be the giant middle finger the girls at my school needed.

You see, it's sad that here I am twenty years later, somebody who makes a good living for himself and has never mistreated a woman and I see women dating and marrying the opposite. And sadly for me, it's too late when they have a kid. I have a cousin who had a daughter with a drunk loser. If she wasn't my cousin, I would NEVER want to date her since I don't want to raise some drunk schmuck's snot-nosed, poopy-pants rugrat. For me, I've had to deal with women who turned out to be royal losers in the end. One used me for my money to aid her drug habit and another was going through a divorce, and her husband cheated on her. Judging by the photos of her 15 years ago and now, I know why he cheated on her.

Sorry to quote the great David Van Driessen, but men have feelings, too. They get hurt. When they feel that the world's against them, they'll do something about it. They can drink to the point of having their liver explode or they can go to a strip club and pay some young college girl to rub against them. You know, my maternal grandfather's father died when he was only nine years old. He spent his younger years without a male role model in his life since his mother remarried multiple times in his youth. He served in the Navy in World War II and when he was discharged, he suffered from what doctors called "shellshock". All they told him was "go home, grow up and be a man". Of course, these days, they call it something else: PTSD. Because of this, he turned to alcohol. It ruined his first marriage, which my mother came out of. Maybe because of his drinking - and the alcoholism that has also ravaged other parts of my family - that I never became a heavy drinker.

You see, it's a shame that I live in the second-largest region in Michigan and I don't have a girlfriend or any prospects. If I want to see pussy, it's an hour drive to either Muskegon, Lansing or Kalamazoo (Deja Vu Lansing's better of the three). Hell, I have a cousin who was in the same boat I was when he lived here. As soon as he moved to Detroit, he got a girlfriend, married her, and now they have two kids with one on the way. It clearly shows that if a man like me can't get a girl here, it's not my fault.

It's too bad that Judy Rose didn't die sooner, like say, twenty years ago, or else this city would still have strip clubs. The only good news is that the Old Dutch Asshole Club is dying off - albeit too slowly - and I hope in the end, people will wake up. To me, a Jebus freak shutting down a strip club is like a Muslim telling a supermarket that they can't sell bacon or a vegetarian or vegan telling that same store that they need to stop selling meat. You don't see that because at least Muslims and non-meat-eaters do show respect for those whose views are different then theirs at least some of the time. OK, so you're Christian and you don't like strip clubs because they - in your feeble mind - deplore women and cause crime. Well, here's my advice: DON'T FUCKING GO TO ONE! Besides, with all the bullshit about children getting raped and pastors flying around in private $60 million jets, thanks, but I'd rather spend time with God's true people.

Thanks, but I'd rather pay off a college girl's tuition than to help a pastor buy lap dances at that same club.

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CHUCK69.COM IS ALWAYS ON!