Names: Michigan Republicans
Ages: various
Occupations: various
Last Seen: Michigan
Bee-otched For: being the reason why they're so goddamned stupid regarding COVID-19
Ages: various
Occupations: various
Last Seen: Michigan
Bee-otched For: being the reason why they're so goddamned stupid regarding COVID-19
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I know. I didn't vote for Gretchen Whitmer. She's too centralist. Hell, her ass got reamed for wanting to raise gas taxes. She needed to think of other ways to fix the damn roads. But, since she's long-rumored to be on Joe Biden's list for a veep...
Just today, Whitmer announced that she's extending her stay-at-home order to May 28. True, everybody's Memorial Day plans are now shot, but anything to fight COVID-19.
However, with the recent protests from hate groups carrying guns and Confederate flags, the Republican-led house and senate are trying to tell the Governor that she better open up now. Yesterday, the legislators filed a lawsuit against Whitmer, claiming that she needed approval from the state house and senate before passing her stay-at-home edict instead of her handing out Executive Orders. One of the people behind the suit is house speaker Lee Chatfield, a Repuke from Levering, a tiny town of 215 that's only about 12 miles south of the Mackinac Bridge. Chatfield, a graduate of (barf) Liberty University is the son of a preacher, Rusty Chatfield. His church, Northern Michigan Baptist Bible Church is one of several churches suing the Governor because he feels that her orders are unconstitutional.
Even though Michigan is a blue state, it does have a lot of vastly-rural territories whose sole residents are conservative Repukes. The area where Chatfield lives in northern Michigan has long been a stronghold for the Rethuglican Party. As a matter of fact, one of the towns in Chatfield's district, Alanson is the home of the Michigan Militia, founded by Norm Olson, an Air Force vet and like Chatfield's father, a Baptist minister. When Bill Clinton announced that he wanted to toughen gun laws in the 1990s, he formed the Militia as a response. He's made many claims, such as Oklahoma City bomber Terry Nichols attending his meetings and that Japan carried out the bombings as a retaliation for a Sarin Gas attack on a Tokyo subway.
Tragically, it seems that the more-northern you get in the Lower Peninsula, the crazier people are. But, when you're miles from civilization, you end up getting strange signals in your tinfoil hat.
Now, I hate most country music with a passion. But, when Natalie Maines from the Dixie Chicks told an audience in England that she's ashamed to be from the same state George W. Bush was also from, I felt her pain. Just recently, I learned that I grew up in the same neighborhood as the current home of one of the most-notorious right-winged scumbags in northern Michigan: "Trucker Randy" Bishop. The 62-year-old from near Torch Lake is the host of Your Defending Fathers, a daily, three-hour talk radio show that airs on WCHY-FM 97.7 out of Cheboygan, a station that's owned by his wife, Victoria, who is 12 years older than he is. Not only that, WCHY, a 3,000-watt station that's 80 miles from Bishop's house isn't even receivable in Torch Lake in part due to co-channel interference from boomer rock stalwart WKLT 97.5 (I guess they're useful for something after all). As a matter of fact, the station just started a GoFundMe to install a new transmitter. In two months, the station has only raised a pitiful $110 out of $50,000 they want raised. Funny, because that station has only been on the air for nine years.
Anyway, what makes Bishop a total kook is that he's a twice-convicted felon.
Over 20 years ago, Trucker Randy was charged with not paying his taxes. He made bad business deals involving his construction business that cost him his licenses in Macomb County. As a result, he moved to Antrim County where he became the leader of their GOP. He also started Your Defending Fathers with Brian Sommerfield, a financial and tax consultant from Petoskey. The two (along with Victoria since the FCC does not allow convicted felons to own radio stations) started up WYPV 106.3 in Onaway, whose call letters stand for "We're Your Patriot Voice". The station moved to 94.5 Mackinaw City and 93.9 Mio as part of a deal with Del Reynolds so he could buy Northern Star Broadcasting several years ago (106.3 is now soft AC "Mac FM"). They sold off 93.9 not long afterward to a religious group and 94.5 was eventually sold to John Yob to extend his WJML empire. I heard WYPV several times, and when I did, I heard not many commercials. At one time, Your Defending Fathers was syndicated to Ann Arbor's WAAM 1600, a station owned by another wacko, Terry "Thayrone X" Hughes.
Oh, and Thayrone donated $10 to the WCHY transmitter fund.
In November, the Bishops bought WCHY from David Smith, who was running a classic country format called Straits Country 97.7 for $75,000. As a result, Your Defending Fathers was relaunched on the station, which carries his show from 9a-Noon and the statewide Steve Gruber Show mornings. The rest of the time, the station carries a 60s-70s oldies format. What's funny is that the station proclaims Motown as part of their routine. It reminds me of when I worked at a convenience store years ago and they only sold Zig-Zags by the tobacco products. I think saying "Motown" (or as they call it "MoTown") on their website only to show that they're not a bunch of racist assholes.
And sadly, even Trucker Randy himself is flapping his arms, crying that the sky is falling. On his show, he recently proclaimed that Dr. Anthony Fauci and Bill Gates should go to prison because of a fake news story that the two planned COVID-19. He's also a proud supporter of getting Gov. Whitmer sued because of her E.O.s.
Folks, I'm going to get a little controversial here. I think a lot of the reasons why people move to northern Michigan in the first place is because they're from Detroit and they hate black people. My parents were from the Detroit area. My mom's from Redford and dad's from Troy. As a matter of fact, my mom told me that she was only blocks away from the 1967 riots. When they married in 1976, their first apartment was an upper flat in Detroit with a black family in the lower floor. A year later, they were both laid off from their jobs. They ended up in northern Michigan because my father's cousin's family was from there and they owned a farm. He came to Detroit in a U-Haul and they moved them up to an area near Elk Rapids. Growing up, my parents struggled to stay in the middle class. My father was the breadwinner because he had the same bus driving job for 23 years. However, he had to work on a cherry farm every summer since it wasn't full-time. Mom had a myriad of jobs since she lost her secretary job at a tool-and-die plant because of Reaganomics. She's worked at a gas station, cleaned houses, worked in a factory and so on.
But, when I grew up and moved to Grand Rapids, I ended up with a job that's full-time, year-round. Business is good, though we've had a rough patch because of COVID-19. To be quite honest, I'd rather be here than up there. At least I can pay my bills on time, I don't have a long drive to the grocery store or gas station and there's more younger people. Growing up, there wasn't much to do in Traverse City. It seemed that you had to be 21 to do anything. Here in Grand Rapids, there's lots for kids to do and even us grown-ups. Traditionally, once you graduated high school up north, you end up south of US-10 anyway because downstate Michigan has what northern Michigan doesn't: universities.
You see, I read shit from northern Michiganders all the time on social media, like "DETROIT'S A HELLHOLE!" Well, so are parts of northern Michigan. Ever seen downtown Kalkaska as of late? Lots of For Sale/Rent signs. I've been in a trailer in Mancelona with another trailer in its backyard with its roof caved in. On my father's bus route, he picked up white trash so poor that our elementary school principal had to buy the kids clothes. Plus, there's the issue of food deserts where there's areas without a proper grocery store. In northern Michigan, there's areas where there's not a grocery store for 10 or even 20 miles! Manton hasn't had a grocery store since Harrison's shuttered over 20 years ago. Lake City used to have a Carter's and a locally-owned Foster's which closed last year. Hell, ELLSWORTH has no place even to buy milk or bread, especially since the town gas station is a farmers' co-op.
Look, my mom was married to a prick who was obsessed with right-winged bullshit and so was his family. Apparently, you weren't one of them unless you were a Christian conservative. Funny, since his older brother slept with a prostitute, got chlamydia and gave his wife scleroderma as a result. Not to mention that getting busted with a DUI was a family trait. Now, my mother's boyfriend just happens to be African American, and he's a better human being than my mom's ex.
The point is that many - but not all - of northern Michigan is inhabited by stupid yokels. And to make matters worse, I'm ashamed that my current hometown of Grand Rapids is the home of the Devos family, part of the reason why all this COVID-19 shit is going on. They helped to get Drumpf elected, they helped fund the strikes in front of the State Capitol and Whitmer's house and now as education secretary, Betsy Devos is making it tougher to convict assholes charged with on-campus rape.
But then again, the Devos clan has their tentacles on northern Michigan, too. They have Fox Motors dealerships in several cities like Traverse City, Cadillac and Charlevoix, where they control all of that town's new car sales. They even helped to fund the reopening of the non-profit Lyric Theatre in Harbor Springs a few years ago.
The point is that because of these rural jackasses, the whole state gets stuck with people like Lee Chatfield, who by the way was charged over $2,000 for trying to take an unregistered handgun onto an airplane two years ago. But since some of these people probably are stuck up there because they averaged a D- in high school, well, this is what happens. They vote Repuke because they think that those nasty, big city Dems are going to give all their tax money to those niggers in Detroit who sit on their asses, watching judge shows all day while whitey works. Of course, John James is an exception because he acts white.
In the long run, Gretchen Whitmer will win, and the real people of Michigan will thank her in the end. If these Rethugs want to "peacefully assemble" without masks during the pandemic, well, I got news for you: when you're six feet under, your rights are long gone.
But at least your tin foil hat will live on.
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Bee-otch of the Day is a production of Chuck69.com, Grand Rapids' site for Stern, politics and more!
Bee-otch of the Day Archives can be seen on http://beeotchoftheday.blogspot.com
Bee-otch of the Day is a production of Chuck69.com, Grand Rapids' site for Stern, politics and more!
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