11.23.20 Bee-otch of the Day: Mike Lindell

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Name: Mike Lindell

Age: 59
Occupation: the My Pillow guy
Last Seen: Minnesota
Bee-otched For: freeing a murderer

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Hello, I'm a straight man, and I love pillows. 

Maybe it's because I like to cuddle and don't have a girlfriend or wife. When a few of my older pillows got old and brown recently, I knew what I had to do: buy some new ones.

As of late, I purchased four new pillows: two memory foam pillows, one Brookstone pillow that keeps cool and a nice, big, fluffy body pillow. 

And NONE of them were MyPillows, which I would never buy in a million years. 

There's too many damn good reasons why I would never buy one of those pillows. For one, it was designed without the help of sleep experts. Instead, it was developed by a crack addict named Mike Lindell. I know someone who had sleep troubles for years, and bought one of those stupid-ass pillows. Well, his sleep didn't improve. 

The big reason why I would never buy a MyPillow is because Mike Lindell is a huge giver to the Republicans, especially Drumpf. Not only that, but he also gives to Fox "News" Channel and their lie-filled shows. When advertisers left Laura Ingraham in droves over her attacks of the victims of the Parkland shooting massacre, Mike bought up all the abandoned ad slots. He's spoken at Drumpf's rallies and even paid a million bucks out of pocket for an anti-abortion movie that spreads lies about Planned Parenthood. 

Now, there's another reason to hate the MyPillow Guy: he helped free mass murderer Kyle Rittenhouse.

Last week, the accused 17-year-old Kenosha gunman was freed on $2 million bond after being imprisoned for three months. Rittenhouse made headlines several months ago when the Illinois teen crossed state lines to Wisconsin with a loaded gun and killed two men in Kenosha while he was "protecting" property. 

Many conservative groups have praised Rittenhouse for being a fighter in the so-called war against rioting in America, which those same fucked-up cons created in the first place. Those groups worked to free Rittenhouse, who is rumored to still be in Wisconsin. Among them include actor Ricky Schroeder and yes, the Pillow Guy. 

Thankfully, the judge has ordered Rittenhouse to be nowhere close to either weapons nor the families of the victims he killed.

The sad truth is that Rottenhouse is a douchebag who was brainwashed by his fat bitch mother to think that liberals and people of color are bad. Yet, protecting property is God's work. When one puts property over people, they're royally fucked up. 

Kyle Rottenhouse is a cold-blooded murderer, plain and simple. He's not a cop nor is he a hero. He's simply an asshole who believed that he was doing good by protecting those buildings. Granted, there's conflicting reports that the two men he killed were felons. But, who was he to judge?

Look, buying things is like voting since a lot of companies support political parties. You buy a MyPillow and you're supporting Drumpf, Fox "News" and now, the freeing of Kyle Rottenhouse. Brookstone is a great brand of pillow and they're mostly Democrat. Granted, they shuttered their mall stores (can't make a profit sitting in those comfy massage chairs), but now, their products are sold at Bed, Bath and Beyond, Costco and other places.

If you want to support a murderer, buy a MyPillow. Thankfully, Biden's president-elect or else Rottenhouse would have been pardoned. As-is, Drumpf already pardoned too many assholes, and he doesn't need to pardon another one. But, with right-winged bullshit in America coming to a near end - at least for now - Drumpf only has 56 days to pardon all the losers in the world who don't need to be freed. 

Sometimes, Minnesota nice goes way too far.

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