11.3.20 Bee-otches of the Day: Kalkaska County, Michigan

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Name: Kalkaska County

Age: 180
Occupation: area of northern Michigan
Last Seen: by Traverse City
Bee-otched For: Whitmer bad

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As the world waits for the results of the 2020 elections, one thing is definitely for certain: the people of Kalkaska County, Michigan are a bunch of idiotic white trash.

Recently, Kalkaska County commissioners made a proposal to call for the impeachment of Governor Gretchen Whitmer. Even though there's no traction regarding their proposal, the commissioners wanted to tell people where they stand on the issue.

Commissioner David Comai told Traverse City NBC station WPBN that Whitmer overstepped her boundaries and violated the Constitution. He also claimed that she is also violating the 2nd Amendment. According to Comai, many have come to him supporting the measure. Fellow commissioner Lauren Clark claims that Comai is wrong and that most in Kalkaska County support the Governor, no matter what.

Bear in mind that Kalkaska is the same town whose ex-mayor, Jeff Seiting, was recalled for using his downtown building as a billboard for Drumpf and the Republican Party, plus using social media to attack LGBTQ+ people, Muslims and others. His bigotry led to near-riots in the small town of only 2,000. Today, the town's mayor is Harley Wales, who apparently acts more like a real human over Seiting. 

IMHO, Kalkaska has other things to worry about vs. wanting to impeach our Governor. If you're not near Kalkaska, go to Google Street View. Downtown looks like a ghost town! Plenty of For Sale signs galore. The Street View is from just last year, and I doubt if any major changes have occurred since it was taken.

Bear in mind also that Kalkaska is the only major town in the county. There's a few unincorporated towns, and they all can all have the suffix "-tucky" attached to it. It seems that virtually everything on US-131 from Fife Lake to Alba is simply like that. 

But, let's also bear in mind that I once knew a few folks from that area. As I've mentioned in the past, I once hung out with a trailer trash family who had two trailers: one that was inhabitable and once that had its roof caved in. As a matter of fact, instead of saving some bucks to get rid of their old trailer, they gave to televangelists. Not only that, they also were tongue-talking Pentecostals. My former stepbrother and sister lived with their alcoholic mother in a few trailers in the Kalkaska and Forest Areas. Plus, one of my cousins lived near Rapid City with his mother, her boyfriend and his half-sister in a nasty old trailer. Of course, that was until the boyfriend tried to gun down his mother by chasing her around the trailer. Thankfully, my cousin's mother ended up marrying a guy in much-nicer Bellaire.

Sadly, there's a damn good reason why the Kalkaska area sucks, and it's its people. It seems that a lot of folks out there seem to have an IQ around those portrayed in the movie "Idiocracy". And because of that, it has a negative effect on all of northern Michigan. One of Kalkaska's most-famous spawn is the shitty rock station known as WKLT. In the 1990s, when downstate rock stations were embracing bands such as KoRn, Rage Against the Machine, Tool and others, KLT had to be that shitty station that had to play their daily quota of "Carry On Wayward Son". Why? Years ago, I had a discussion with a former KLT jock. The story was that their former General Manager, Richard Dills - who lived in Grand Rapids and knew virtually NOTHING about northern Michigan -  would tell everybody at the station that the white trash around Kalkaska was their audience. There was no need to be edgy and fun like stations downstate. Now, granted, KLT did very well in the ratings in the 1990s. Then again, they were virtually the only real rock game in town. Some 25 years later, yeah, they're still doing well in the ratings, but there's also Rock 105 and 95-5 for those who don't like hearing "Hotel California" every 25 minutes.

Look folks, I know that people in northern Michigan hate Whitmer and think that all Democrats do is give hard-earned tax dollars to poor black people in Detroit. The reality is that if you give a poor person money, they'll send it on things they need. Give it to somebody like Pat Robertson and he'll use it to seal the cracks on the helipad at his Virginia estate. 

Let's remember this, too: if you combine all the counties in Northern Lower Michigan, the population is about 506,000. The city of Detroit proper is around 670,000 with WAY less area. Plus, there's Flint (96,000), Lansing (118,000), Grand Rapids (201,000) and more. Sadly, the people of northern Michigan are in their own little world, and the 17,000 people who call Kalkaska County home are a part of it. If Biden wins the election, it's America's middle finger to these retarded hilljacks who probably think that Terri Ray is the greatest gift to rock music since the days of Elvis. 

But, if a riot were to happen to Kalkaska, there wouldn't be anything to worry about since it would only do $37.23 of damage.

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