6.6.19 Bee-otch of the Day: terrestrial radio

BECOME AN AFFILIATE OF T-SHIRT HELL AND MAKE SOME MONEY!

Bee-otch of the Day honors are awarded Monday through Thursday; Bee-otch of the Week is awarded Sunday morning on Chuck69.com.

-------

Name: terrestrial radio
Age: 97
Occupation: entertainers and informers of the public
Last Seen: everywhere
Bee-otched For: dying off
 

-

Howard Stern always has, and always will be the King of All Media.

True, I do miss him having strippers in the studio and his latest book is mostly transcripts of his shows, but he's still better than the crappy-assed excuses of morning radio out there.

This week, Howard and the gang have been talking about the death of terrestrial radio, especially last week's demise of 95.5 WPLJ in New York City. As we all know by now, WPLJ was sold to Christian broadcaster Educational Media Foundation and is now simulcasting their K-Love Christian Contemporary format. For almost 50 years, it had those legendary call letters, an homage to Frank Zappa's cover of an old doo-wop tune from the 1950s. At first, WPLJ was a rock station, but morphed to a CHR format in the 1980s and finally Hot AC.

WPLJ's parent, Cumulus sold the station and several others for $100 million. Another sold station was another long-time rocker, Los Angeles' KLOS, also at 95.5. However, their new owners plan to retain its format.

Also this week on the Stern Show, Howard and the gang got to hear another Tradio call from Richard and Sal. This time, the two picked on a DJ who was leaving radio after 45 years to go work for a water treatment facility. Howard commented that it's sad that something like water has a better future than radio and ya know what? He's right.

When I was a kid, I wanted to be in radio. But after hearing that most DJs get paid shit wages, I decided to look for another job. Even though I got stuck with an asshole boss for 10 years, I'm now getting paid a helluva lot more than most DJs.

I look at Smitty, formerly of northern Michigan's Rock 105 and 95-5. He left radio for good earlier this year to work for Right Brain Brewery in northern Michigan. I also read that Ida the night jock from crosstown WKLT quit to focus on her home-based businesses. And guess who replaced her on the night shift? NOBODY! Yep! Good 'ol Otto Mation is playing the butt rock melodies that make up KLT's playlist. Sad, since back in the day, KLT had a request show at 11 pm at night. Nowadays, radio stations are doing away with overnight jocks and now, night jocks. Up in northern Michigan, only sister station 94.3/92.5 The Fox and 106 KHQ have local night shows. Here in Grand Rapids, B93 and WLAV are the only stations I can think of that still have live and local night shifts.

And yes, all the rest of the stations out there either use simple automation or a satellite show for their night shifts.

The sad truth is that radio is only getting worse and worse all thanks to government bills like Telecom 96 letting big corporations take over more and more media entities. Plus, technology has gotten a lot more smarter. When I was 14, I visited WKLT's old studios on Garfield Ave. in Traverse City. Back then, they had a massive CD automation system that took up a corner of the room. Today, my smartphone can carry more tunes than that. Hell, if I had the proper automation software and even a mini transmitter, I can start my own radio station off of my laptop!

(And no, I don't have plans on that happening.)

Of course, let's not forget the SiriusXMs, the Pandoras and the Spotifys of this world. In Spotify's case, you can even create your own personal station only playing your favorite tunes. So, if you love hard rock but hate Nickelback and Creed, Spotify is for you. Just type in a bunch of tunes and viola! You have your very own kick-ass radio station. Call it WYOU if you want (just don't tell the CBS affiliate in Scranton, PA) or if you're on the west coast, KYOU (ditto for the dual Fox/NBC outlet in Ottumwa, IA).

July 1st will mark Chuck69.com's 20th birthday. The reason why I started this site was to tell the local media in northern Michigan that they needed to wake up. Some of it has improved, some of it hasn't. At least Howard Stern's now heard everywhere on SiriusXM and northern Michigan has a decent Active Rock station in Rock 105/95-5. Hell, there's even Q100, which has a 6,700-song playlist and has a devout following. However, KLT is almost a complete butt rock station and for the most part, most radio stations ANYWHERE don't bill as much as they used to. Then again, maybe this is karma for the fact that 20 years ago, the only radio station up north that reached out to my generation was the now-defunct 106.7 The Peak. KLT and The Bear only cared about machine shop workers and The Zone - which morphed into Rock 105 and 95-5 - ODd on Lilith Fair wuss music. Today, Rock 105 and 95-5 are almost neck-and-neck with KLT while The Bear - even with once-popular KLT morning host Omelette in morning drive is almost dead last in the ratings.

Grand Rapids, however, isn't much better than northern Michigan. WGRD plays a lot of shitty butt rock from Def Leppard and Lynyrd Skynyrd, but at least they're local from 6 a.m. to 7 p.m. as opposed to Rock 105 only being local for afternoons. And at least we here in GR don't have to sit through Terri Ray.

But sadly, the days of personality-driven nighttime radio are becoming looooonnnnng gone.

---

  --

Got a Bee-otch to nominate? E-mail us @ chuck69dotcom@gmail.com. All suggestions (except for me) are welcome!

Bee-otch of the Day Archives can be seen on http://beeotchoftheday.blogspot.com

Bee-otch of the Day is a production of Chuck69.com, Grand Rapids' site for Stern, politics and more!

CHUCK69.COM IS ALWAYS ON!