Thursday, January 30, 2020

1.30.20 Bee-otch of the Day: Mike Bloomberg


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Bee-otch of the Day honors are awarded Monday through Thursday; Bee-otch of the Week is awarded Sunday morning on Chuck69.com.

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Name: Mike Bloomberg
Age: 77
Occupation: billionaire
Last Seen: New York City
Bee-otched For: being another pretend progressive                                                                 

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This weekend, the great American yearly pastime is going to create a lot of cheers and a lot of nachos to be eaten.

The LIVth running of the Super Bowl will be held in Miami at legendary Joe Rob-er, I mean Hard Rock Stadium. The 49ers and the Chiefs will be squaring off (and I'm rooting for the Chiefs because of what the 49ers did to Colin Kaepernick) to see who will be the ruler of the pigskin.

Of course, if you don't like the game itself, there's always the commercials. This year, Bud Light's knights will be making a return, along with Bryan Cranston's much-hyped Mountain Dew commercial channeling "The Shining". Sadly, every year, the Super Bowl does produce its fair share of commercial duds. And it's expected that the worst ads during this year's game will be from a man trying to buy the Democratic nomination for president.

Former Republican New York City mayor Mike Bloomberg just whapped down $10 million for a 60-second Super Bowl ad talking about his record on gun control. In the commercial, a mother talked about her son being shot and killed. Later in the ad, she talks about Mike Bloomberg and his attacks on the gun lobby.

The only thing worse than Bloomberg's commercial is that, well, Drumpf has one, too.

Now, granted, if I had to choose between Bloomberg and Drumpf, I'd choose the Green Party candidate. But, if there was no GP candidate, I wouldn't vote, but if I had a gun to my head, I'd choose Bloomberg in a heartbeat. But since he's in fifth place in national polls, I'll say this: he's just another rich guy trying to buy the election.

Look at my home state of Michigan. Years ago, another filthy rich jackass, Rick Snyder began his gubernatorial campaign during the Super Bowl. He was elected and became one of the worst governors in this state's history. But on the issue of progressives running for state office, let's remember Shri Thanedar. He was the weird Indian scientist who called himself a progressive, yet, he's rich and stirred controversy when it was announced that the test animals found in his labs were malnourished.

Yes, Bloomberg's claiming that he's for universal healthcare, women's rights, the environment and gun control. But guess what? HE'S AGAINST RAISING TAXES FOR THE FUCKING WEALTHY! For somebody worth $60 billion, he sure doesn't want the middle class to get ahead.

Personally, Boomberg is a wolf in sheep's clothing who acts like a progressive and is pandering to those who hate Drumpf. Hell, he's worth more than Drumpf, who is worth around a paltry $3 billion. Bernie Sanders even warns about this country becoming an oligarchy where the wealthy control the government. True, Bern's worth $2 million, but he's in the poor house comparing to other Democratic candidates for president.

Before you know it, Mike will be cutting down a door with an ax before screaming "HEEEEERE'S JOHNNY!"

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