Tuesday, January 22, 2019

1.22.18 Bee-otch of the Day: Cumulus Media


Bee-otch of the Day honors are awarded Monday through Thursday; Bee-otch of the Week is awarded Sunday morning on Chuck69.com.

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Name: Cumulus Media
Age: 22
Occupation: media giant
Last Seen: Atlanta, GA
Bee-otched For: same mistake, different market
 
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It's always nice when failing radio stations change format.

But when they change to one that's guaranteed to be a dud, it leaves one shaking their head.

On Saturday, after two weeks simulcasting with the former 107.3 WBBL, the Thunder country format moved to 107.3 fulltime while 94.5 was relaunched as 94.5 The Q. The station is adult album alternative, which means a lot of Dave Matthews Band, Train, Sarah Mclachlan and Imagine Dragons.

Currently, 94.5 is running jockless and without commercials. This is the first time Grand Rapids has had some type of alternative station since WGRD flipped to full-time active rock in 2010. However, alternative in this town has not had a great track record. Toward the end, WGRD only had ho-hum ratings while a station somewhat similar to The Q, 96.1 Radio X, never made it above a two share in the ratings.

Ironically, 94.5 was the longtime home of WKLQ, which moved to 107.3 about 15 years ago. They flipped to all-sports WBBL 10 years ago. The sports format recently moved back to 1340 AM while the format that replaced WKLQ on 94.5, Thunder 94.5, moved its country format to 107.3.

Now, I wouldn't be too surprised if the WKLQ call letters came back home to 94.5. Right now, they are being stored on AM 1490 in Whitehall, which is simulcasting 1340's sports format. I know, I'd love to see The Rock @ ninetyfour dot five come back  But it's damaged goods. If it ever came back, it would be a sad, bastardized version of its former self. Plus, Howard Stern is on SiriusXM and many of their former jocks have moved on. Cristi Johnson (née Cantle) owns an embroidery shop in Alpena, Suzy Cole programs the rock stations for Apple and Bill Walters reportedly became a Jebus freak.

Of course, when I saw that 94.5 flipped to AAA, I thought to myself, "WHAT WERE THEY THINKING?" AAA is NOT a successful format, at least in Michigan. Detroit's 93.9 The River has always been a ratings dud and Northern Michigan's 106.3 The Mitten generated little buzz during the less-than-one year it was on the air. I think they are trying to siphon some of the listeners from the eclectic 88.1 WYCE. However,  I think that their listeners are too loyal with them. Why abandon a locally-run station run by community volunteers for a station owned by the same assholes who banned the Dixie Chicks over Natalie Maines' outburst regarding George W. Bush?

You know, something to think about is the fact that Cumulus just got out of bankruptcy. Simply put, they got there because of poorly-run stations. Granted, they should be happy to rid themselves of the abortion known as WJRW and the fact that the Huge Fat Retard is off of their payroll. However, as I've mentioned, The Q will be back to a two share or less by fall book.

Here's something to ponder: since Grand Rapids is the second largest city in Michigan and there's a PLETHORA of African Americans, WHY ISN'T THERE A FULL-POWER FM URBAN STATION IN WEST MICHIGAN?!? There's a reason why WSNX is #1 in the ratings, and it's because they're the default urban station in town. Cumulus should have considered urban for 94.5, but they're too vanilla to care. Of course, Townsquare won't do it because they already have Magic 104.9 (which does excellent with 250 watts) and iheartmedia already has WSNX. So, if one wants to hear Drake, Cardi B. and Travis Scott, they have to sit through Taylor Swift, Arianna Grande and Imagine Dragons. After all, WSNX is still technically a CHR, though they do throw hip hop fans a bone.

But that's ok. While local radio keeps fucking up, the real world will be listening to satellite radio and the internet.


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