9.17.20 Bee-otches of the Day: people criticizing "WAP"

Bee-otch of the Day honors are awarded Monday through Thursday; Bee-otch of the Week is awarded Sunday morning on Chuck69.com.

 

Name: various
Age: various
Occupation: various
Last Seen: everywhere
Bee-otched For: not embracing "WAP"

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It's the song of the Summer. 

This week, rapper Belcalis Marlenis Almánzar, aka Cardi B scored her third #1 on the Billboard Hot 100 with "WAP". Her previous #1s were "Bodak Yellow" and "I Like It". 

Not too shabby for a tune that terrestrial radio is avoiding like the plague. 

By now, we all know that "WAP" stands for "Wet Ass Pussy" (the radio edit utilizes the more-FCC-friendly "wet and gushy"). While many are commanding Cardi - who just filed for divorce from Migos member Offset - for being frank with her sexuality, others are attacking her for being raunchy.

I'll admit that the first time I've heard about the song was from good 'ol Fox "News" Channel assclown Fucker Carlson. He used it to criticize Joe Biden for interviewing her for the Democratic National Convention. And just this past week, a rock music "legend" decided to attack Ms. B, claiming that "WAP" should have been DOA. 

Michael Sweet, singer and guitarist for the 1980s Christian metal band Stryper took to Facebook, bitching, "call me old fashioned but when I think of my grandkids listening to this and singing along to this piece of 💩 I get a little heated. Why do we work so hard for equal rights and respect (especially for woman as we should!) yet we make a pile like this #1 and step backwards instead of forward?"

He continued, "Am I being harsh?? Am I the only one who feels this way???"

Of course, B has sold way more albums than Sweet. Stryper was a 1980s one-hit wonder with "Honestly", which peaked at #23. Sweet was also the first lead singer of Boston after original front man Brad Delp took his life in 2007. Maybe people would rather support somebody talking about her wet ass pussy over a guy who sells out God to make a few bucks.

Look, Cardi B is NOT the first woman to sing about her sexual freedom. Hell, if it makes Sweet happy, Cardi B is also a devout Catholic. I know that in the age of the #MeToo movement, we should still not have to tell women what's acceptable and what isn't. If a woman wants to sing the praises of her wet ass pussy, let her. If she wants to sing G-rated Radio Disney fare, let her and so on. 

Finally, the fact that top 40 radio is skiddish on wanting to play "WAP" doesn't surprise me. Honestly, it's pitiful that most CHRs aren't true top 40 stations anymore. Back in the day, stations used to be programmed by playing the top 40 of Billboard's Hot 100 (hence the name). Now, it's what the consultants throw at them. It's not about the listeners, it's about beancounters want to please themselves and the advertisers. It explains why CHR radio is loaded with crap. Look at the the song "Bang!" by AJR. It's at #23 on the Nielsen's CHR radio chart, but only #51 on the Hot 100. Harry Styles' "Watermelon Sugar" is #1 on the pop chart, but #7 on the Hot 100.

I know. Top 40 radio has had a long, miserable history of not wanting to play songs because they're controversial or they're "too black" for their station. Trust me. When I was a kid c. 1992, my local CHRs laid off of "Baby Got Back" and "Jump Around". Hell, one of them even started sprinkling in country shit like Alan Jackson's "Chattahoochee" and Tim McGraw's "Don't Take the Girl", both instant dial-turners. 

The point is that top 40 ain't really top 40! It's a fake list, plain and simple. And heaven forbid that any CHR play "WAP" because of the untrue stigma that the only people who should listen to CHRs are mommies and their 10-year-old soccer superstar daughters. This is why people are avoiding radio altogether and going with digital. Hell, I'm really enjoying the "Pandora Now" channel on SiriusXM. If CHRs were programmed just like that channel, it would be a ratings hit.

The moral of the story (and the Ashe song peaked at #71 while it's blaring out on CHR radio everywhere) is that when a consultant tells people what to listen to vs. what people want, the listener won't get "Wet Ass Pussy", they'll get bland, dry programming instead.

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