Monday, November 5, 2018

Our political endorsements for 2018

Well, here it is. Our first REAL political endorsement list, ever.

Here's a sampling of whom I'm personally supporting in 2018. While this list will NEVER be complete, we feel that you should use your own judgment before hitting the polls tomorrow.

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All three proposals: YES
We feel that decades-old prohibition on pot was built on lies (**COUGHREEFERMADNESSCOUGH**). Cannabis has never killed anybody. When was the last time people died from a pot overdose? The people fighting the legalization of pot are a bunch of right-winged assclowns who have been all misinformed about its dangers. If weed is legalized, it will take dealers off the streets and it will mean less teens smoking it as well. As for Proposal two, we agree that people should be allowed to choose their own candidates. Too many districts in Michigan have been put in favor of Republicans because of gerrymandering. Also, yes, it's time for people to be able to vote on the same day they register. What if people move to Michigan not in time to vote?

US House Distrct 2: Rob Davidson
Davidson supports healthcare for all. His opponent, Bill Huizenga doesn't. Just another Repuke who thinks he's creating good jobs.

US House District 6: Matt Longjohn
Longjohn is pro-single payer healthcare and women's rights while his opponent, the elderly Fred Upton has a hot neice and nothing more. I love it that in his ads, Longjohn proclaims that he will not stand with Nancy Pelosi. A true lefty.
State Senate District 34: Poppy Sias-Hernendez
Poppy grew up in the ghetto known as Muskedump-er, Muskegon Heights, so she seems down to earth. She's pro-single-payer healthcare and wants to protect women's rights. Her opponent, Jon Bumstead, might be related to Blondie and Dagwood.

State House 101st District: Kathy Wiejaczka
As some of you know, my aunt passed away last summer at the age of 60 from cancer. She was a Registered Nurse at the Grand Rapids Home for Veterans. Kathy's an RN herself and I feel that having an RN represent the people of northern Michigan is more honorable than having an old country music DJ getting the job. I've heard too many negative things regarding O'Malley, like how he treated his co-workers at WTCM to the fact that he's pro-"family values" and yet he reportedly cheated on his ex-wife. Plus, word has it that he's still on the WTCM payroll, even though he's legally not allowed to be on the air due to his campaign. It's time to have O'Malley retire for good.

US House District 1: Matt Morgan
District 1, IMO is extremely crazy. It's most of northern Michigan PLUS the whole fucking UP. Whomever made the notion that Marquette shares the same values as Traverse City must have been huffing glue. Jack Bergman lives in a small hick town called Watersmeet, which is damn close to the Wisconsin border. Morgan lives in Traverse City. Morgan supports single payer healthcare, improving schools and fixing roads. Bergman is a feeble old fart.

Attorney General: Dana Nessel
The Repukes' attacks on Nessel as somebody who allows strip clubs to hire minors is another "Reefer Madness" moment where the right uses scare tactics to protect people from the truth. Her opponent, Tom Leonard is an NRA asskisser. OK, what's more important: protecting our kids from guns or strip clubs? True, it's wrong seeing a naked 15-year-old, but then again, where were the parents in that situation? Plus, Nessel plans to go after Nestle, who is paying this state just $200 per year to make BILLIONS off of our water.

Secretary of State: Jocelyn Benson
Recently, my mom moved to Grand Rapids from Phoenix, she had to get a new driver's license and since she bought my old car, she had to get new plates and tags. Well, that related to two trips to the SOS and two LONG waits that took three hours out of our lives. Under current SOS Ruth Johnson (who was Dick Devos' running mate for governor in 2006), it seems that the SOS has gotten WORSE since the last times I went there. I agree that the SOS needs more offices, which means less lines.

US Senate: Marcia Squier
Squier wants to end the war on drugs, create healthcare for all and cut funds for the military. Debbie Stabenow is too establishment to be a true leftist. The fact that she threw away all of Bernie's votes representing Michigan is a slap in the face for all. Plus, the fact that she voted to waste our tax dollars on our overinflated military shows that she can't get shit done. It's time for fresh new leadership, and we ain't talking about Uncle Tom John James, either.

Governor: Keith Butkovich-er, Jennifer V. Kurland
Look, I know that Gretchen Whitmer is a sweet lady and she'll whip Bill Shitty-er, Schuette's ass to become Michigan's governor. But sadly, she's too establishment. Hell, she's against single-payer healthcare because guess who's supporting her? Yep, the for-profit insurance companies. Plus, her running mate, Garlin Gilchrist is reportedly a Detroit slumlord. Kurland is running for governor because she didn't like how the Dems treated Bernie Sanders in 2016 and that needs to change. As for Butkovich, let's say that I wouldn't allow somebody who used to regularly post on the Michigan Radio and TV Buzzboard to become governor, lol.

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Well, there you go. Michigan, get out and VOTE!!

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