Wednesday, February 7, 2018

2.6.18 Bee-otch of the Day: Pat Robertson


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Name: Pat Robertson
Age: 87
Occupation: Satan
Last Seen: Virginia Beach, VA
Bee-otched For: living

Breaking news: Pat Robertson is still alive.

Last Friday, the host of The 700 Club was rushed to a Virginia hospital after suffering a stroke.

According to his son Gordon, who often pinch hits for his father, his wife was supposed to go see Pat's wife on Sunday after church. However, in their words, God told her to see her right now. So, she drove over to Pat's home and within two minutes, he was showing signs of a stroke. Within moments, Robertson was rushed to the hospital and by the time he arrived, his whole right side had been paralyzed. However, Gordon was able to arrive on time to allow doctors to inject a drug called tPA that cleared out the blood clot that caused the elder Robertson his stroke. Within moments, Pat was waving his arms and practically pretending that the stroke didn't happen.

Gordon says that his father is now home again and should be back to hosting The 700 Club - named in part because the show only seems to have 700 viewers - in a few days.

You know, sometimes I wonder why people like Pat Robertson outlive so many others who are more deserving of a nice, long life like his. I look at my aunt, who is battling brain cancer. She helped so many as an RN at the Grand Rapids Home for Veterans for many, many years. She made a modest income and always has been a godly woman and a good mother to her two children. She's currently living with her older sister and she says that she's very weak from chemo. As a matter of fact, it took her 30 minutes just to swallow eight pills. The sad thing is that she'll be 60 in a few months, yet for some reason, 87-year-old Pat Robertson survives a stroke. To me, that makes me question God's existence.

I know, God has a plan for everybody. Some people live past 100 and others die in the mother's womb. However, I do wonder if God's plan involves blaming all of life's problems on the LGBT crowd like he and Jerry Falwell did after 9/11 and even paying lawmakers like Hillary Clinton to stop talking about bringing universal healthcare to America. It's a shame that he's had successful heart surgery simply because his sheeple give him millions and yet these same people go through bankruptcy when they have a heart attack of their own.

In the end, at least he's old so he will die in a few years. Too bad that stroke didn't end it all.



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