Occupation: soon-to-be-ex-president (I hope)
Last Seen: Washington, DC
Bee-otched For: Whaaaaaaa!
Ut-oh! Somebody's a little fussy!
As of this typing, America STILL doesn't know who will take over The White House in January. But, our personal projections are still aiming at former Vice President Joe Biden.
Tonight, Biden won Michigan. He just needs to win Nevada to declare victory with the 270 electoral votes needed to be the next POTUS.
But poor 'ol Drumpf thinks that he's the winner. In fact, earlier this morning, he declared himself victory, even though he was a long ways away from winning the Electoral College. In fact, in some states, it was neck-and-neck.
Even here in Michigan, I was shocked when I woke up at 3:30 a.m. this morning to see my state as red as Rudolph's nose (too soon?). But, it simply turned out that the absentee ballots hadn't been counted yet. Whew! I thought it was 2016 all over again. But in reality, Biden won this state by over 120,000 votes in the Mitten.
But now, Baby Drumpfy is in his high chair, throwing his Cheerios around, crying that he might not be the most-powerful man in the world come January 20, 2021.
Earlier today, he called for a recount in Wisconsin and sued to stop all votes from being counted in Michigan. However, our Secretary of State Jocelyn Benson has said that no matter what, the counting will continue as long as possible. The only good news regarding Michigan so far is that Antrim County, over by Traverse City, is going to get a hand recount because the traditionally-Republican area voted heavily for Democratic candidates such as Biden and Senator Gary Peters. Bear in mind that Governor Gretchen Whitmer owns a home in Antrim County, and Michael Moore used to have a home on Torch Lake.
Of course, Drumpf needs to know that America is run by the people and for the people. He has exposed himself as having piss-poor sportsmanship throughout his presidency If he loses officially, too fucking bad. Over 150 million Americans have spoken and more than half of them don't want another four years of tax breaks for the wealthy, the middle class paying more in taxes, women's rights being abused, healthcare being compromised and too much more. We want our life before the 2016 brouhaha back.
If Biden wins, I wish him nothing but good vibes. He will need them. He ain't perfect, but he's too much of a better human over Drumpf. He'll definitely Make America Great Again.
But until then, it ain't over 'til it's over.
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