2.3.13 Bee-otch of the Day: Republicans

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Bee-otch of the Day honors are awarded Monday through Thursday, Bee-otch of the Week is awarded Friday on Chuck69.com.



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Name: The Republican Party
Age: 160
Occupation: America's right wing
Last Seen: Washington, DC
Bee-otched For: celebrating 10 years of protecting our children from boobs


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This past Saturday marked the tenth anniversary of one of the most-tragic events in American history. A day that will forever live in infamy.

It was the day when millions of people around the world witnessed an event that didn't quite kill them. It didn't cause any violent attacks, nor did it really scar anybody.

It was the day when Justin Timberlake sang "Rock Your Body" while serenading Janet Jackson and at the end of the song, he accidentally yanked off part of her bustier, exposing her right breast for about two seconds.

Even though countries such as Australia and Britain have shown boobs on TV for decades, oh, no! We can't do that here in America! Of course, the far right - even though we were stuck in three fake wars over what happened on 9/11 - worried more about protecting our children from Janet Jackson's boobie over sending them into war. So, they wrote to the FCC and they decided to raise fines to well over a million bucks per offense. Because of the Big Breast Outbreak of 2004, a lot changed in the way television and radio treated profanity and nudity. Rock stations edited songs they've played uncensored for years ("Money" by Pink Floyd and Alice in Chains' "Man in the Box" come to mind) and poor Howard Stern was yanked off the air from Clear Channel stations, which further prompted his move to SiriusXM.

Even MTV changed their ways somewhat; they inserted a stupid flower pattern to a half-nude female actress in Maroon 5's "This Love" video, even though no nudity was shown. MTV got a lot of flack, especially since they produced the Super Bowl Halftime Show.

Thankfully, the FCC got a taste of their own medicine not long ago when the Supreme Court ruled that Janet Jackson's accidental nudity wasn't obscene and that CBS, which aired that year's Super Bowl was free from any fines. However, the Court did not overturn their decades-old "seven dirty words" rule, even though it was only based on an old George Carlin comedy routine from 40 years ago.

But sadly, even though the government overreacted to the infamous nip-slip, when there's a school shooting like Sandy Hook or a mall shooting like the one in New Jersey last week, they don't care. It's sad when our government thinks that the Second Amendment is more important than the First. Janet Jackson's right breast never killed anyone. It never caused any guy to go out and rape a woman. But yet, our children are exposed to huge amounts of violence on TV and video games, and our government thinks it's OK.

If we learned anything from Janet, it's that when we have Republicans running the show, expect the worst. It's one reason why I'm a damn proud Democrat who wants more done to get people like me out of the "working poor" status and back into "middle class" territory. It's weird that they worry about some old black woman's tit over the more-important things.

But nonetheless, it's a day some would like to lower the flag... lower than Janet's sagging mammary. 

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1.30.14 Bee-otch of the Day: Rick Snyder

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Name: Rick Snyder
Age: 55
Occupation: failed CEO
Last Seen: Ann Arbor, MI
Bee-otched For: giving us this year's worst Super Bowl ad by default
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Every year, the Super Bowl gives us some of the most-rememberable ads.

You might not like the game, but the commercials can be quite funny. Being a radio guy, I think last year's Paul Harvey "farmer" ad for Dodge Trucks was one of the better ones. Another ad - not aired nationally, but rather in some small towns like Glendive, MT - was for Old Milwaukee Beer, featuring Will Ferrell french-kissing an old Asian woman.

But the Super Bowl gives us some ads we want to forget. Sadly, most of those ads are for right-winged morons. Remember Pete Hoekstra's racist China ad from two years ago? Cost him the election.

But now, we have an automatic winner for "worst Super Bowl ad of 2014", and it hasn't aired yet. It's for Michigan governor Rick Snyder, who has yet to officially announce his campaign for second term. It was in 2010 that Snyder's first ad aired, and it was during the Super Bowl. It talked about how he started building computers at an early age, blah, blah, blah, and how he ran a successful computer company (Gateway, which he actually buried into the ground).

From what I've heard, the reason for Snyder's win was partly because he had way more funding than his Democrat competitor, Lansing mayor Virg Bernero. A lot of Snyder's funding's from the Devos family. It was partly thanks to the Devoses that Michigan is now a Right-to-Work state and our economic recovery has slowed to a trickle.

I have the saddest feeling that Snyder will win the 2014 election only because his rich buddies are all on his side while he'll continue to shut down towns he sees as "struggling" with emergency fund managers and take pensions away from hard-working Michiganders to please his wealthy friends. Even more, the Snyder camp has reportedly spent more than half a million dollars for his re-election campaign.

The only thing I'll say is that people need to not listen to the hype. Snyder is an asshole who hates the middle class and will do anything to please the Devoses. People need to get off their asses and vote this turd out of office. I hope the next governor of Michigan will fix all of Snyder's wrongs and return Michigan to the direction Granholm and Obama were going in with the automakers.

Things are only going to heat up, and we need it.

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1.28.14 Bee-otch of the Day: NBC

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Name: The National Broadcasting Company
Age: 88
Occupation: fourth place TV network
Last Seen: New York, NY
Bee-otched For: thinking that an old formula will work in 2014
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Sometimes in the world of broadcasting, what's old is new again.

NBC hasn't had the best luck all year. As a matter of fact, they're in fourth place behind Fox, CBS and ABC. Only two of NBC's shows - The Blacklist and American Ninja Warrior - made it into the top 25 on the Nielsen charts.

Of course, NBC has been there before, and much worse. Remember the late 70's and early 80's. Yep, pure crap like She's the Sheriff and Pink Lady and Jeff. But in 1984, they launched The Cosby Show and the ratings took off.

I remember an old Al Jaffee article in MAD Magazine as a kid that talked about what TV network initials really stood for. PTL was "Preachers Taking Loot", ABC was "A Bland Channel" and NBC was "Needs Bill Cosby" with an image of him carrying 30 Rockafeller Center. I've always wondered why people found Cosby funny, especially since when he blasted The Simpsons for not being funny, and yet that show was a helluva lot funnier than his.

But now, NBC needs Cosby's help... Again. Last week, it was announced that he's developing a new "multi-generational" sitcom that will have a lot of the same elements as The Cosby Show. His co-star will be Phylicia Rashad and it will be produced by Carsey-Werner. Cosby also used both Rashad as his wife and Carsey-Werner for his two previous shows, including Cosby, which ran from 1996-2000 on CBS.

Now, it is noted that Cosby was canceled only because of poor timeslot decisions by CBS. But the question is, can 76-year-old Bill save NBC?

I'll admit that I have a love-hate relationship with Cos. He's trying to prove that blacks can be successful and smart, but the fact that he is trying to fight a so-called war against obscenity and trying to set a good example for all people does fall flat on his ass.

His biggest example? Fat Albert and the Cosby Kids. Now, I've been watching a lot of that show as of late, especially since it's on BounceTV (WOOD-TV 8.2 here in Grand Rapids). Some of the episodes I've seen have dealt with gambling, smoking, pornography and drugs. Yet, Bill plays gigs at casinos, has been spotted with fat cigars and is a regular at the Playboy mansion. I also love the fact that FA has been lauded for its positive portrayal of African-Americans, yet many of the black voices on the show were that of whites, such as the show's producer, Lou Scheimer, who voiced Dumb Donald. It's also worth noting that most of the people who voiced Albert's friends - Eric Suter (Rudy), Jan Crawford (Russell) and Gerald Edwards (Weird Harold) - have virtually no information on the web about them.

Oh, and it's also noted that Cosby is working on a revival of FA. No word on what the show will be like once it airs (bear in mind that Filmation closed in 1989 and Lou Scheimer passed away late last year).

Granted, I don't HATE Bill Cosby; it's just that you have to take his advice with a grain of salt. He might say one thing, but he'll act against it. He's almost no different than a preacher preaching against gays and yet, he's one himself. I wouldn't be too surprised if Bill cheated on his wife of 50 years, Camille many times. After all, he paid off a woman claiming to be his love child years ago.

So there. I think NBC needs to have better ideas than to bring back Bill Cosby in yet another Cosby Show knockoff. But, it's almost weird to see that the same network that hired Howard Stern to do America's Got Talent is putting him on the same network as Cosby. Talk about strange bedfellows.

But as they all say, it's the viewer who makes the final call.

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1.27.14 Bee-otch of the Day: Justin Bieber

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Name: Justin Bieber
Age: 19
Occupation: shitty pop singer
Last Seen: Florida
Bee-otched For: proving that it's time for him to get deported
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Since he hit the scene a few years ago, what has Justin Bieber proved?

Well, he can play just about every instrument possible, but sadly, he puts it into bad use by singing pop songs so saccharine-indused that it will give one the diabeetus.

Now, the pop tart is facing deportation because last week, he was busted for underage drunk driving and having cannabis and prescription meds in his system while drag racing his Lamborghini. He's now facing jail time and possible deportation.

Oh, and I find it funny that Mr. Bieber is a practicing Christian. Is it me, or are "practicing Christians" more prone to DUIs than that of normal people? Look at Glen Campbell, Mel Gibson, Scott Stapp and others. Somewhere, Jesus' palm is slapping his head.

I think people who have lost family to drunk driving accidents should be storming mad at Bieber for his irratic decisions. I hope by the time he releases another album, it'll debut so low that his label will drop him and he'll end up playing bad clubs in rural Canada. It's time to deport the little fucker and not allow him back in the good 'ol U.S. of A.

It's too bad Patti Mallette was too anti-abortion when she got knocked up.

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1.23.14 Bee-otch of the Day: Peyton Manning

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Name: Peyton Manning
Age: 37
Occupation: quarterback, Denver Broncos
Last Seen: Colorado
Bee-otched For: making me a Seahawks fan

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A week from this Sunday is a national holiday for most Americans (and a nightmare for pizzarias).

Yes, it's the day of the Super Bowl, a day of beer-drinking, nacho-eating and a day to see who will be the best football team of the year. This year, it's between the Seattle Seahawks and the Denver Broncos at the frozen MetLife Stadium in New Jersey's Meadowlands.

Well, I've already chosen who should win the Super Bowl, and it's the Seahawks. Not because their QB, Russell Wilson only makes less than a million per year, it's not because I think defensive back Richard Sherman's outburst during last Sunday's NFC championship against 49er wide receiver Michael Crabtree was hilarious, but it's because of one thing:

Peyton Manning is an asshole.

Yes, I'll admit, I can't stand Peyton Manning. Why? Well, he's a Jebus freak, he's donated to the Republicans - including Dubya - and he's butt buddies with "Papa" John Schnatter, whose pizza chain happily cut workers' hours over Obamacare, even though the chain's in the black and he lives in a big-assed mansion in Kentucky.

Russell Wilson's a man of God, too, but in a good way. As a matter of fact, he's done a lot of charitable work while Manning's money towards Bush and other Republicans helped to kill and wound thousands in Iraq.

So, there. If the Seahawks win the Super Bowl, it will also show that Seattle can rise after they lost their Sonics to Oklahoma City (why?), plus it's a good gesture considering that it's the 20th anniversary of the passing of one of its finest musicians, Kurt Cobain.

Maybe when the Broncos lose, Manning will blow his brains out that it will splatter... in Omaha!

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1.22.14 Bee-otch of the Day: Right to Life of Michigan

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Bee-otch of the Day honors are awarded Monday through Thursday, Bee-otch of the Week is awarded Friday on Chuck69.com. DON'T FORGET TO "LIKE" BEE-OTCH OF THE DAY ON FACEBOOK! ----------   Name: Right to Life of Michigan Age: 47 Occupation: anti-woman's group Last Seen: Grand Rapids, MI Bee-otched For: using kiddie porn to get their message across --- Last week, my TV was in the shop because of a faulty power supply. It was kinda nice to have no TV for a week. It was nice and peaceful in my home and it allowed me to do more internet stuff. Well, last Friday, my TV came home, and some of the commercials made me wish I had a gun so I could shoot it. With this being a hot election year, many groups - mainly far-right-winged ones - are already advertising their dreck locally. One group in particular is Americans for Prosperity, which is funded by the Koch Brothers. But one ad that royally pisses me off is from Right to Life of Michigan which has children doing stuff with captions saying pro-this and pro-that set to the theme of the Our Gang shorts of the 1930's. One of the images is that of a baby boy running naked with his butt exposed with the caption "anti-clothes". Ya know, I love the fact that some of these same idiots behind RTL are probably the ones who pissed and moaned about Janet Jackson's tit exposed during the Super Bowl 10 years ago. Now, isn't seeing a baby's ass on TV considered *GASP!* CHILD PORNOGRAPHY?!? Quick! Somebody call BOTH the FCC AND CPS! Or better yet, this guy: But what really grinded my gears is how RTL was behind the recent passing of a law here in Michigan that forces all women in Michigan to have special insurance if they're going to get raped and have an abortion. State Democratic leader Gretchen Whitmer has bravely spoken out against the bill, especially since she was a rape victim herself. You see, the RTL is funded by many in the far right, and some of these people are anonymous. The fact that their ads are everywhere make me think that some of their donors include some of Michigan's richest, like the Devos family. But the sad thing is that while RTL is pro-life, many who are raised by single mothers live in poverty and are lucky to even graduate high school since some of them have to work full-time jobs at a young age. But yet, the Republicans and Jesus freaks are richer than ever. Now, I won't be able to watch an Our Gang short the same way ever again. --- Got a Bee-otch to nominate? E-mail us @ chuck69dotcom@gmail.com. All suggestions (except for me) are welcome! Bee-otch of the Day Archives can be seen on http://beeotchoftheday.blogspot.com! Bee-otch of the Day is a production of Chuck69.com, Grand Rapids' site for Stern, politics and more!

1.21.14 Bee-otch of the Day: northern Michigan's 9&10 and Fox 32

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Name: Heritage Broadcasting
Age: 31
Occupation: owners, WWTV 9&10 and WFQX Fox 32
Last Seen: Cadillac, MI
Bee-otched For: proving that people don't like their programming decisions

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It's a shame that thanks to below-the-desk deals, northern Michigan now has fewer TV choices than that of Marquette these days.

Yes, THAT Marquette, where for years, WLUC-TV 6 was predominately with CBS, but found ways to shoehorn in programs from either NBC or ABC, depending on what network WJMN-3 was with that week. Now, WLUC is full-blown NBC and WJMN is CBS. ABC's on WBUP-10, Fox is on WLUC-6.2, The WB is on WBKP-5 and MyNetworkTV is on WZMQ-19, which also has This TV and Antenna TV.

In all, four companies own all the stations in da you pee. Sadly, northern Michigan is stuck with - for the most part, and not counting low-powered MyNetworkTV WLLZ-12 and all-news WMNN-26 - two owners: Heritage Broadcasting runs CBS WWTV-9&10 and Fox 32 WFQX while anti-Obama Sinclair owns NBC WPBN 7&4 and ABC 29&8 WGTU.

True, Heritage *should* be the lesser of all the evils up north. They're locally owned by a fellow named Mario Iacobelli whereas WPBN/WGTU are owned by Sinclair, which is known for their bias against the Democratic Party and even yanked shows such as an episode of Nightline for revealing the names of all the people who died in Dubya's fake war in Iraq.

But sadly, the lesser of all the evils is still evil.

True, since Heritage took over WFQX, their news quality has improved by a ton, especially since the newscasts are produced by 9&10. But programming-wise, it's a joke. One of the first things Heritage did when they "purchased" Fox 32 was move Maury to the 3 a.m. graveyard and put The 700 Club on at 10 a.m. Eventually, Maury got the boot and was off northern Michigan TV for about a year or two until WGTU picked it up for the 2013-14 TV season. Now, Fox 32 is a joke filled with cheating televangelists, infomercials, 3rd-rate repeats of old TV shows and the god-awful Bethanny.

Last week on their Facebook page, 9&10 posted a promo for Ellen on their Facebook page. Her guest was none other than Kim Kardashian. Viewers made comments such as "quit making stupid people famous" and "It's just really saddens me that this country is so pathetic that we spend time focusing on people like this instead of important things". I wrote "And sadly, nobody up north airs Jerry Springer. His show is a helluva lot more intelligent than anything the Kardashians have done".

Oh, I got two likes from that comment. I might be on to something.

Yeah, I know. The northern Michigan region isn't the smartest region in the state. All the high schoolers go downstate to college and they stay downstate until they get old and retire. Those who never went to college up north probably make crappy wages because they were a D student at best. But that's the business of television for ya. The lesser the IQ, the more viewers you get. It's worked for Honey Boo-Boo and Duck Dynasty and it'll work for shows like Ellen. But thankfully, the viewers have spoken.

Oh, and guess what Fox 32's airing next weekend? Yep! The yearly 700 Club beg-a-thon! For three hours next Sunday, Fox 32 will air the crapfest in which Pat Robertson will beg poor dumbasses to give him all of their money to keep up with his lavish lifestyle while they dive further into the poor house. Only one other secular station in Michigan airs The 700 Club and it's WMYD-20 in Detroit.

Personally, I would like the FCC to look into companies that have other companies "own" their stations for them. Heritage has a guy from Arizona own Fox 32 for them while 29&8 is "owned" by Cunningham Broadcasting, which owns stations for Sinclair. I think the people up north deserve more choices instead of fake celebrities and televangelists telling them to give them their money. Also, the thought of rebroadcasting 9&10 on 32.2, 32 on 9&10.2, 7&4 on 29&8.2 is quite stupid. Hell, when Max Media owned 29&8, at least they had The CW on their .2! Now, it's only on cable. At least here in Grand Rapids, we have Antenna TV, Bounce TV, MeTV, ThisTV and a few others on our .2s, and a lot of the time, they have better shows than what's on cable.

In a few weeks, a famous event in television history's 50th anniversary will occur, and I'm planning on giving the Bee-otch of the Day to a big TV market that missed out on it because of two owner stupidity.

Don't miss it!




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