Thursday, June 23, 2011

6.23.11 Bee-otch of the Day: Westboro Baptist Church

Name: Westboro Baptist Church
Age: 56
Occupation: hate group
Last Seen: Topeka, KS
Bee-otched For: being Jackasses

This world is so filled with Jackasses.

And yes, Fred Phelps is one of them.

The independent baptist church with less than 100 members, famous for their multiple "God Hates ____" websites and protests of American soldier funerals is at it again. They plan to protest the funeral of Ryan Dunn, the member of the hit MTV series Jackass who was best-known for his stunts involving jumping into sewage and shoving a toy car up his ass.

It was also noted that in Jackass: The Movie, Dunn drove a golf cart with co-star Johnny Knoxville as his passenger into a plastic pig, hoping to be crushed. However it didn't, and the cart ended up flipped over with Knoxville landing on his neck. During the film's director's notes, co-star and CKY co-partner Bam Margera stated that Dunn was a bad driver.

Dunn died Monday morning when he lost control of his 2007 Porsche 911 GT3 when it swerved off the road, flew through 40 yards of woods and crashed into a tree in rural Pennsylvania. The accident also killed his passenger, Zachary Heartwell, who was a production assistant on Jackass: Number Two. It was revealed that Dunn, Heartwell and a friend were all drinking that evening since it was posted on Dunn's Twitter account. Toxology reports have revealed that Dunn's blood alcohol content was .196, more than twice the legal limit in Pennsylvania, which is .08.

Speed was also a factor in the crash that killed Dunn; it was believed that he was driving upwards to 140 MPH; the speed limit was 55 MPH.

Needless to say, Dunn's death left Jackass fans saddened and stunned. However, his critics came out of the woodwork. Roger Ebert - who never reviewed any of theJackass films - wrote on his Twitter "Friends don't let Jackasses drive drunk". His tweet angered many, including Perez Hilton, who called his tweet "insensitive". Even Dunn's friends slammed Ebert, including Margera, who wrote (and yes, I've combined his tweets since they're over 140 characters):

"I just lost my best friend, I have been crying hysterically for a full day and piece of shit roger ebert has the gall to put in his 2 cents about a jackass drunk driving and his is one, fuck you! Millions of people are crying right now, shut your fat fucking mouth!"

(Um, Bam, I'm deeply sorry for your loss, but I hate to break it to you that Roger Ebert can no longer talk - or eat - because of cancer surgery several years ago that destroyed part of his face and vocal chords.)
Since the tweet, Ebert has done damage control by writing a blog about the situation. He even revealed that Dunn was also arrested in 2005 for another drunk driving incident. Needless to say, people have given him mixed responses for his post, but then again, who hasn't made a tweet or post that has pissed off everybody? Hell, I do it all the time!

But, sadly, then there's Westboro Baptist.

In a press release, the cult stated:

"This arrogant jackass, famous for his 'vulgar stunts' at which this nation snickered,  died in a car accident in Goshen, PA (one of the most evil states to ever exist) after tweeting a picture of himself & two "friends" drinking - just hours before a 3 AM high-speed crash left him & his passenger dead & in flames. This is no prank! In His wrath, God cut off this young man in the prime of his life, because he made a mock of sin, and taught his fellow man to grievously sin against God! God will not acquit an arrogant, proud, filth-loving sinner, who spent every ounce of every resource God gave him to pimp grotesque, nasty (and not even slightly funny) sin!"

Dunn's funeral will be this Friday, June 25th at the DellaVecchia, Reilly, Smith and Boyd Funeral Home in West Chester, PA with a public memorial to follow. Heartwell's funeral will also be held at the same funeral home on the same day.

You know, I will agree. Ryan Dunn was an asshole for not only putting his life in danger, but others as well. He was doing both shots and beer, which can be a lethal combo. But dammit, he did stuff nobody would ever do with a 30-foot pole. He made us laugh. That's what he wanted to do. He mixed damn near killing himself at times and making us laugh. Hell, look at Harold Lloyd: he put his life in danger by hanging on to a clock hand 30 stories off the ground without a net. But guess what? His movies made millions and he was one of the big pioneers of silent film.

Thing is, we're human and we make mistakes. Many learn from their foibles, others don't. I'll bet that despite Ryan Dunn making a huge mistake by drinking and driving, people will still watch Jackass movies and TV shows and laugh. Kurt Cobain did massive amounts of drugs, put his kid in danger and blasted his brains out and he's still a hero of rock. John Belushi speedballed to death and he's still funny when he chugs down an entire bottle of Jack. So on and so on.

My point is, yes, Ryan Dunn fucked up. Big time. But his family and friends still need their privacy. It's pathetic that the ultraconservative Supreme Court recently ruled in favor of Westboro, stating that they do have the right to protest funerals. I hope the Jackass army shows up to the funeral home on Friday to beat the shit out of the Phelps clan and give them a message. Ryan Dunn was a human, the LGBT community's 
human... WE'RE ALL HUMAN.

They should take that, insert it into a condom and shove it up their ass. Sideways. 


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