Thursday, October 13, 2011

10.13.11 Bee-otch of the Day: Detroit Red Wings

Name: Detroit Red Wings
Age: 85
Occupation: Detroit's NHL team
Last Seen: Detroit, MI
Bee-otched For: changing their name... kinda

As I've mentioned on this site before, I recently dumped my cable.

With my job not giving me enough hours and pay and my bills mounting, I figured that if I really wanted to watch something only cable has, there's always the web.

Of course, one thing I'll miss is Red Wings hockey. But, sometimes, when I miss a program, I tend to think of the bad. For one thing, at least I'm not supporting Fox Sports Detroit, which is a division of NewsCorp and the evil Murdoch family. True, the Wings might win a Stanley Cup this season, but maybe when they're in the Finals, it'll be on free over the air TV.

But, there's another reason why my support for the Wings has dramatically fizzled this year: they kinda changed their name.

They are now known as The Detroit Red Wings... Presented by Amway.

Yes, THAT Amway. You know, the company that has people knocking on your door trying to sell snake oil under a pyramid scheme? Yep, that Amway. Bear in mind that the family that runs Amway, the DeVoses, also own the Orlando Magic NBA team, so they're no stranger to sports. The Wings are owned by the Ilitch family, and even though both the family and the team's got some mean bucks, they still had to sell their soul to one of the most-evil companies in the world.

And here's something that really pisses me off: not long ago on their Facebook profile, The Wings showed a picture of an old woman who won tickets for their training camp. The woman's name? Judy Rose. Now, I'm not *totally* sure if this is the same Judy Rose who is behind Grand Rapids' totally-unconstitutional strip club law, but if it is, it's pure proof that Rose is totally in bed with the DeVoses and Amway. After all, I wouldn't be surprised if DeVos threw her the bucks to pass the law, which has killed jobs and tax base for the city.

Let's not forget the other big reason why I don't support Amway: their ties with the Prince family. Dick DeVos is married to the former Betsy Prince, the daughter of the late Edgar and Elza Prince who founded the Prince automotive parts company that made vanity mirrors and computers in cars. The Princes were diehard right-wingers who helped create and fund several fundamentalist Christian groups such as the Family Research Council and the American Decency Association. Many Stern fans know that the ADA was the group known for making fiercely untrue statements about Howard Stern as part of their infamous "Information and Action Page".

But, let's not forget that the Princes also gave us Erik Prince, the little spoiled rich bastard who founded Blackwater/Xe to hunt down innocent Muslims in Afghanistan because Jesus told him to. And that's the American Way, or should I say, Amway.

You know, it was a magical moment when the Wings won their first Stanley Cup in over 50 years in 1997. After years of being throwaways in the NHL, it was Mike Ilitch who guided the team to being hockey's best. But like any businessman, he got greedy and when Amway agreed to slap their name under the logo for the next few years, he took the bait.

Thanks, but I like the Detroit Red Wings over the Detroit Red Wings Presented by Amway. Why would I want to support a business that's kissing the ass of a business that brings so much corruption to the world? Sorry, but Ilitch has sold his soul to the devil on this one. At least the Lions are kicking ass and the Pistons might or might not have a season this year with their new owner. Of course, the Tigers might end up losing against the Rangers as-is.

Oh, well. They'll get eaten again by the Sharks in the playoffs as always.

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