4.11.12 Bee-otch of the Day: Matt Hanlon

BECOME AN AFFILIATE OF T-SHIRT HELL AND MAKE SOME MONEY! Bee-otch of the Day honors are awarded Monday through Thursday, Bee-otch of the Week is awarded Friday on Chuck69.com. DON'T FORGET TO "LIKE" BEE-OTCH OF THE DAY ON FACEBOOK! -------------------    Name: Matt Hanlon Age: 48  Occupation: none at the moment Last Seen: Grand Rapids, MI Bee-otched For: COMPLETE FAIL --- Ladies, gents and children of all ages, I'm one of the happiest men in Grand Rapids right now. Why? 1) I still have a job and 2) Matt Hanlon doesn't. I'd thought I'd never see the day that the moron who helped destroy Citadel Broadcasting would be thrown in jail or even arrested, but it happened. Last Friday, Hanlon was arrested, but for unknown reasons. The Kent County Sheriff's Department booked him under "other", which probably meant that what he did was a civil infraction. However, judging by his mugshot (seen above), he looked like he had either 1) just woken up, 2) had a tough night, 3) had some allergies (after all, there's some folks with colds right now) or 4) judging by that weird sore under his left nostril, he was hitting the lines. True, I could pay the Sheriff's Office $6 to know what caused Matty-poo to spend some time in jail, but I'm happy enough to know that whatever he did got him canned from his current job at Townsquare Media - parent of WGRD, WFGR, WLHT and WNWZ - where he was handling advertising sales. As we all know, it was good 'ol Hanlon who notoriously screwed over listeners and employees alike with his moronic antics. After all, he was the guy who severely demoted Howard Stern from 50,000-watt WKLQ to 1KW pisshooter WBBL - then at 1340 - and destroyed KLQ's brand by replacing the likes of Mark Feurie and Bill Walters with has-beens like Darren Arriens and Michael Grey. Thankfully, Hanlon should be proud that he wasn't the man who canned Stern from Grand Rapids; it was his ex-boss Farid Suleman. But let's not forget the other mistakes Hanlon did, whether it was Ron and Don, trying to get another junkie - the late Rick Beckett along with Scott Winters - to take over Stern's old slot on KLQ, moving KLQ to 107.3 and eventually blowing it up after becoming GRD's bitch, firing Rich Michaels in Lansing, getting Dave and Geri to anchor mornings on a new, upbeat CHR in town, and so on and so on. The only thing that Hanlon seemed to do right was WLAV, but even in the end of his run as GM, it was underperforming in the ratings with Kevin Matthews in the morning. Oh, and let's not forget.... HUUUUUUUUUUUUUGE. In the end, Hanlon saw the door when Citadel got sucked up by Cumulus and his old job was gone. He resurfaced at Townsquare shortly thereafter, but after whatever happened, he became a goner. I guess he won't be the GM of ANYTHING soon... I know, Hanlon's a family man - he has five kids - and provided them with a nice life and all. However, the fact that he made radio fans in Michigan angry - me especially included - makes it tougher for me to forgive him. There's that part of me that makes me think that the reason why he fucked over Stern was to please his friends at Amway, but who knows. I'm VERY happy that we're finally getting to see Hanlon as the man who he really is: an asshole who makes mistakes, and ones so serious that it causes his hilarious mugshot to be exposed on the web. I know, it's not nice to kick a man when he's down and Jesus said that he who without sin may cast the first stone, but I make my exceptions. If I ever had the money, I'd like to own my own business one day. I imagine myself being a grocer, for one. If I started a supermarket and Hanlon came in in ragged clothes with no penny to his name, I'd tell him to go away. Heck, I hope that if he forces himself to work in a smaller market like my old turf of Traverse City, nobody would hire him. In the end, Chuckamaniacs, Hanlon is a failure, PERIOD. He failed as a GM and he failed as a human being. Maybe he'll learn from his mistakes and be a better man someday, but not on my terms. Don't let the door hit you on the ass, Matt. After all, PMITA makes that door slam even worse. -- Got a Bee-otch to nominate? E-mail us @ chuck69dotcom@gmail.com. All suggestions (except for me) are welcome!  Bee-otch of the Day Archives can be seen on http://beeotchoftheday.blogspot.com! Bee-otch of the Day is a production of Chuck69.com , Grand Rapids' site for Stern, politics and more!