Monday, April 23, 2012

4.23.12 Bee-otch of the Day: Matt Hanlon (and The Grand Rapids Press)

Bee-otch of the Day honors are awarded Monday through Thursday, Bee-otch of the Week is awarded Friday on

Name: Matt Hanlon
Age: 48
Occupation: none
Last Seen: Grand Rapids, MI
Bee-otched For: really, REALLY fucking up


FINALLY! The Grand Rapids media is touching on former Citadel regional VP/GM and Townsquare SVP ad sales Matt Hanlon's recent fuck-up.

On Friday, The Grand Rapids Press ran a story on his recent arrest and added detail to what exactly happened. Needless to say, it's anything but pretty.

On April 6th, Hanlon was arrested after his Range Rover collided with a Saab driven by 47-year-old Srinivas Voruganti, also of Grand Rapids. His 44-year-old wife, Saritha was his passenger and both were taken to the hospital and treated for minor injuries. The accident occurred at 2:14 p.m. while Hanlon was attempting to turn left into the D&W Food Center at Knapp and East Beltline when his SUV collided with Vorugnati's car. Thankfully, the couple's injuries were minor, but Hanlon wasn't so lucky.

He was taken to the police station where he blew a .14 on the breathalyzer test, nearly twice the state of Michigan's legal limit. He was later released from the county jail on a whopping $100 bond. Hanlon was scheduled to appear in court last Friday but waived his appearance because his lawyer, Henry Emrich entered a not guilty plea in a mailed statement, which the court allowed.

According to police, Hanlon told them that the other driver was speeding, which might have led to his not guilty plead.

Let me tell you something, Chuckamaniacs, two years ago, I got myself into a car accident right in front of my house. I live on an avenue with four lanes each side. I looked to the left, and there were two SUVs turning right, and nothing to the right. I looked again, same thing, so I made a left turn. Suddenly, out of nowhere, another car came out of nowhere and slammed into my left front end. Sadly, my car was a total loss, especially since it was an older vehicle. Even worse, I couldn't see the woman's car both times I looked to the left; she was in a blind spot each time. The police came, they assessed the situation, and found me at fault. I told the officer that I thought that she was driving too fast, and guessed what he told me? "Well, she had the right of way."

Oh, and my BAC? 0.0. However, I was fighting some major allergy problems, which might have affected my train of thought.

IMO, I think Hanlon fucked up. A .14 and crying that the other driver was going too fast will land him in the slammer. Plus, bear in mind that the East Beltline is one of the most-congested arteries in Grand Rapids and driving drunk on that road during the day is, well, a bad idea.

Of course, Hanlon should be lucky that neither of the two people were killed in the accident, or else he'd be in jail. Although he'll probably be ending up taking a bus to work for a whil- er, oops! He's now without a job! Plus, he'll be paying his attorney a ton of dough, plus fines up the ass. It might be a great payback for a man who screwed over Stern fans, rock fans and even his now former employees. So much for trying to kiss the Dutch and Chamber of Commerce's asses.

Oh, and a major FUCK YOU to The Grand Rapids Press for 1) waiting TWO WEEKS to publish this story and 2) erasing my post in the comments section regarding how fucked up Hanlon was. Hell, I'm shocked that the people on the BUZZBOARD loved my post (and they'll be happy to know that I've grown mentally since my last post on there five years ago... I think...)! But, that's the way they are. Their excuse was that they were worried that it wasn't "newsworthy enough". BULLSHIT. Hanlon's a VERY public figure in the Grand Rapids area since he was one of the area's top radio execs and was an icon, mainly for all the wrong reasons. I almost chuckle knowing that the Press and their sister papers in Flint/Tri Cities aren't doing so hot. Sucks to be them. If I see one of their people begging me to subscribe to their little shit paper, I'll just walk away.

In the end, I hope Hanlon's bottoming out will make him a better person. If I hear an honest and humble apology from him for screwing over his listeners and employees, I might be open to him. Sometimes, somebody needs to hit rock bottom for them to understand what they did wrong. Will an "I'm sorry" be acceptable for the damage he did? We'll see. But it's not going to bring KLQ, Stern, Mark "The Head" Feurie, Bill Walters, Cristi Cantle, Tim Barron or Rich Michaels back onto the west Michigan airwaves. The damage is well beyond repair.

Riding off into the sunset and disappearing for good would be more appropriate. Of course, his poor wife Debbi would have to do the driving.

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