Monday, August 19, 2013

8.19.13 Bee-otch of the Day: Clear Channel

Bee-otch of the Day honors are awarded Monday through Thursday, Bee-otch of the Week is awarded Friday on



Name: Clear Channel
Age: 41
Occupation: Satan
Last Seen: San Antonio, TX
Bee-otched For: getting flooded


From the "Gee, Chuck! You're a few weeks late!" Dept...

OK, OK, so the Great Clear Channel Flood of 2013 happened a few weeks ago, and since I was on vacation all this time, I apologize for not giving them the proper reaming they needed earlier. By the way: 1) I was in the Detroit area for the Woodward Dream Cruise, and I was able to hear the first few minutes of the new Detroit Sports 105.1 and it wasn't too bad. Of course, I think a lot of Detroiters are happy that Drew Lane's back on the air although Mike might be AWOL for a while. 2) Personally, I'd rather buy a car from Kelley LaFontaine over the Devoses or even Berger Chevrolet any time.

But in all seriousness, the story goes like this: a week ago Friday, a pipe burst in an underground parking garage where Clear Channel's vehicles were stored for their Grand Rapids stations (ie WSNX, Star 105.7, 101.3 The Brew, etc.). The building was flooded, destroying the vans and causing gallons of gas to be combined with the water. Because of this, part of downtown was evacuated and the building that housed Clear Channel's stations had its electricity cut off, forcing their stations to air dead air or weird crap. For an example, WOOD-AM/FM - normally a right-winged hate talker - aired top 40 music. Country B93 did air satellite-fed programming, albeit with poor sound quality.

By Saturday morning, all was well again and all of Clear Channel's Grand Rapids cluster was back in business.

Sound familiar?

Ah, yes, let's not forget that this is the same Cheap Channel who caused 80,000 of their loyal B93 fans to lose their cars during the Great Clear Channel Flood of 2009 at the Ionia County Fairgrounds. The story was that a ton of rain hit the area the week before the B93 Birthday Bash and the parking lot of the Fairgrounds are used as a flood plain so the 11,000 residents of nearby Ionia don't end up underwater. Well, the Birthday Bash went as scheduled and the fine folks at Consumers Energy opened the dam, causing the 80,000 concertgoers to lose their vehicles. Nobody from either Consumers or Clear Channel bothered to warn the attendees.

In the end, a judge ruled that Clear Channel wouldn't have to face any class action suits and that insurance would be picking up the damages. After all, Michigan is a PLPD state. But since this is country music that we're talking about, a lot of people who lost their cars were poor and for many, it was their sole source of transportation.

Now, it's Clear Channel's turn to realize what karma really is. Their stupidity cost their listeners their cars and trucks, and now it's their turn. I even heard that their employees aren't even allowed to use their garage. At least they have a car to drive while CC is going to have to pay a visit to the dealership.

And chances are, they aren't going to get The Family Deal.

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