Monday, February 13, 2012

2.13.12 Bee-otch of the Day: Bobby Brown

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Name: Bobby Brown
Age: 43
Occupation: washed-up R&B singer
Last Seen: Los Angeles
Bee-otched For: eventually causing Whitney Houston's death

If you've been hiding under a rock all weekend, let me say this now:

Whitney Houston died Saturday night at the age of 48. No cause of death is known at this point, although the police have found pills in her hotel room. Houston was staying at the Beverly Hills Hilton, where she was to perform at the Grammys yesterday.

Instead, during the show, tributes poured. Many celebs Tweeted and sent tributes to the fallen pop star, including Dolly Parton, who wrote her mega-hit "I Will Always Love You" originally for her friend Porter Wagoner, who introduced her to the world on his long-running TV show. Parton's version of the song was a hit on the Country charts twice - 1974 and a re-record in 1982 - but for many, it was Houston's signature song since she made it a worldwide phenom.

Whitney was always considered a good girl, singing in her mother's choir and living her life as a Christian. After being discovered by Arista Records founder Clive Davis in the early 1980's, she signed with him and in 1985, she had her first hit with "You Give Good Love", which made it to #3 on the Billboard pop charts. Her next single, "Saving All My Love For You" went straight to #1.

In her career, Whitney had 11 #1 Billboard hits on the pop chart and sold over 170 million albums worldwide. However, her last #1 hit came in 1995 with "Exhale" and the hits dried up. For years, Whitney drifted into a world of drugs, booze and Bobby Brown.

The two met at the Soul Train Music Awards in 1989 (ironic, since Don Cornelius died just 13 days ago) and married in 1992. The two divorced in 2007 after years of problems, and Whitney tried to stage a comeback. Sadly, the magic was gone. She was to play the Grammys this weekend, but it wasn't meant to be.

Houston did date a lot of men more eligible than Brown, such as Eddie Murphy. The travesty regarding Houston and Brown's relationship was simple: Brown was a bad boy while Houston was a goody-two-shoes. Why Houston saw something in Brown is something one would ever want to know, like Ike and Tina or Rihanna and Chris Brown. But, that's life.

True, the death of Whitney Houston is sad, but in a way, I'm not totally 100% sad she's gone. When I was young, my parents divorced and my Mom and I moved in with her best friend, a fat cunt who looked like Divine from the John Waters movies. One reason why my Mother left my Dad was because so she could live with her and help her out financially since she was in tremendous credit card debt and on the verge of getting kicked out of her house. One of my unfortunate memories of her was that she played the goddamned Bodyguard soundtrack day in and day out while she *allegedly* sucked guys' cocks down in her bedroom. I was just 12 at the time, and looking back, I wished I could have ran out of there and never looked back.

Nonetheless, Whitney conquered the world in only 48 years. Yes, it's sad to see her go, but sadly, she allowed Bobby Brown to fuck her life up. It's sad that there's men like me who have problems getting dates, and have never done anything wrong to ANY woman, ever. In the end, Whitney paid the price while the man who led her to her sick lifestyle gets to live. That's life. I wouldn't doubt if she OD'd, possibly on painkillers. We won't know for weeks.

Whitney Houston: An American Tragedy, brought to you by Bobby Brown.

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