Monday, August 22, 2016

8.22.16 Bee-otch of the Day: Mother Nature

Bee-otch of the Day honors are awarded Monday through Thursday, Bee-otch of the Week is awarded Friday on



Name: Mother Nature
Age: ageless
Occupation: the decider of what the weather should be
Last Seen: everywhere
Bee-otched For: ruining my Saturday


This past weekend, I was planning to go to the theater to see the new computer animated movie for us grown-ups called "Sausage Party".
Instead, the closest I got to an actual Sausage Party was the fact that I ate bacon for breakfast on Saturday.

Saturday was looking like a good movie day since it was going to rain. I was looking at the radar, but then, I saw that there were tornado warnings in Allegan and Van Buren Counties, both south of here. I told myself, "I'll just go to a later show after the storm passes, just in case". I decided to do my laundry and then, I heard the siren.

Kent County was under a Tornado Warning.

I went back to my apartment where I had my TV on WOOD-TV 8. Ellen Bacca and Kyle Underwood were on the air tracking the tornado, which trashed the town of Bangor and was heading towards downtown Grand Rapids. By about 4pm, the warnings expired and Grand Rapids itself suffered damage. Uprooted trees, damaged business signs and trees falling on structures were all from the four tornadoes that the National Weather Service believed hit the area. They believed that the strongest was an EF-1.

According to WOOD-TV 8's Bill Steffen - who has been a meteorologist for over 40 years - this was the worst tornado to hit the area since the 1980 Kalamazoo tornado that ravaged downtown and killed five people. Thankfully, there wasn't even an injury during Saturday's tornado.

Of course, the fact that many towns here in Michigan all have sirens and weather-predicting technology have all advanced since the days TV station weathermen wearing real estate salesmen jackets slapped magnets onto a map helped a lot in making sure nobody was killed during the tornado. The fact that cell phones all have weather alerts have weather alerts helped, too.

The real heroes were indeed the forecasters warning people to stay inside and go into the basement if possible. True, WOOD-TV got a slap in the wrist, IMHO when they returned to Olympic Volleyball when the tornado system left Grand Rapids. It wasn't out of their viewing area yet and they were telling everybody to flip over to sisters WOTV or WXSP even though not everybody watching with rabbit ears can get those stations. Nonetheless, they got the award for best storm coverage.

As an added bonus, Terri the Whor-er, DeBoer wasn't there to wreck the breaking coverage. All she's good for is hosting that awful eightWest show for old yentas.

As for "Sausage Party". well, I wasn't going to venture out to the cinema if the power's out for some and the roads could be bad. Better safe than sorry. Hell, if I have to wait until it starts showing at Woodland, may it be so.

Better to wait to have the Sausage Party vs. being roadkill.  


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