Wednesday, August 3, 2016

8.3.16 Bee-otch of the Day: Terrestrial radio

Bee-otch of the Day honors are awarded Monday through Thursday, Bee-otch of the Week is awarded Friday on



Name: terrestrial radio
Age: 96
Occupation: supposed entertainers and informers of the public
Last Seen: everywhere
Bee-otched For: being a heartless, soulless business

People in Jacksonville, TX are angry and sad that one of their favorite radio stations is off the air.

The CHR station known as 95.3/102.3 The Breeze in Jacksonville was a favorite among the locals. However, the station's owner died in May, leaving the station into a huge family feud. On Monday, the station's morning show arrived at the studio at 5:30 am when they noticed that the doors' locks had been changed. They called their boss, but a short while later, they were greeted with the men in blue.

The Jacksonville Police showed up, telling the DJs that they were not to be on the premises, saying that they were fired last Friday, even though they were not given any notice. Apparently, the jocks were at a local peace rally when the firings were made. The daughter of the station's deceased owner, who had power of attorney came over to explain everything. Since the firings, the DJs have taken to Facebook apologizing to listeners, advertisers and the charities and organizations that the station represented. They've also contacted OSHA over the fact that they've gotten sick from the lack of air conditioning in the studio.

While 15 people are now looking for jobs in Texas, the Big, Fat, Pill-Popping, Prostitute-fucking Idiot just got re-signed.

In an unprecedented move, Rush Limbaugh and long-time syndicator iHeartMedia (fka Clear Channel) agreed to a new agreement. No terms were released, but this comes as a surprise since his ratings - for the most part - are lower and iHM is a company $20 billion in debt. Of course, Rush is enjoying some temporary success thanks to Donald Trump's run for the White House, but once the elections end and the political ads stop, iHM will probably end up shooting themselves in the foot.

But one other thing that's been pissing me off is that the ratings service Nielsen simply doesn't want to reveal the radio ratings for northern Michigan. Now that Cadillac is involved, northern Michigan is now market 159, making them bigger than Kalamazoo. But even though the company has a policy to reveal the numbers for stations that subscribe to the book, they seem to want to keep northern Michigan's hush-hush for unknown reasons.

The sad thing is that when a radio company - big or small - lacks transparency, the listeners end up getting swept under the rug. Hell, just yesterday, I was listening to Rock 105 out of northern Michigan and for their daily "The Box" segment (where they're supposed to play songs not heard on the radio for a while), they played "My Friends" from the Red Hot Chili Peppers. REALLY?!?! Isn't that one of their most-overplayed tunes? Plus, for their daily "Radar" segment (where they play a tune that's charting but not in the station's rotation), they spun "The Eagle Has Landed" by Avatar. Um, GRD's been spinning the SHIT out of that one for WEEKS, assholes. Plus, the song's #15 on the Active Rock charts per Mediabase.

You see, this is why terrestrial radio sucks, especially in the past 20 years. Radio companies don't give two tin shits about their employees or their listeners. It's about entertaining the lowest common denominator.  "We play only 200 songs! Don't like it? Suck our dicks!" Uh, no. Instead, we'll listen to Sirius, Pandora, Spotify, Slacker or whatever cool service is out there.

Corporate radio: killing themselves one less listener at a time.

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