Tuesday, August 23, 2016

8.23.16 Bee-otch of the Day: Lou Pearlman

Bee-otch of the Day honors are awarded Monday through Thursday, Bee-otch of the Week is awarded Friday on Chuck69.com.



Name: Lou Pearlman
Age: was 62
Occupation: the producer of really shitty music
Last Seen: getting poked in the pooper by Satan's three-pronged stick
Bee-otched For: being one rotten human being


I know that it's not nice to spit on the dead, but it's OK to make exceptions.

In the case of Louis Jay Pearlman, he did two horrible, horrible things: 1) he swindled $300 million from people in a huge Ponzi scheme and 2) he gave us 'NSync and The Backstreet Boys.

Lou was the owner of Transcontinental Records and basically used douchebaggy teenage boys in the 1990s like Justin Timberfake to make millions of bucks from girls that hadn't grown pubes yet. Because of Lou, I, being a fan of hard rock and metal forced to live in a part of Michigan where radio was loaded with shitty music as-is, was flipping the dial more often thanks to shitty boy bands left and right. I was thankful that Hot Topic just opened because I ended up buying a t-shirt that read "'NSUCK" (I also bought a shirt that read "Spear Britney" that I still wear from time to time, holes and all).

Thankfully, both 'NSync and The Backstreet Boys broke up and their fans had moved on to slitting their wrists to My Chemical Romance. Lou was still making money from his little Ponzi scheme, which lead him to a 25 year jail sentence that started in 2008. However, he had a stroke in 2010. Maybe the eatin's good at the prison in Texarkana, TX. He died on Friday.

You know, even though I hated the boy bands he created, I'm glad that they sued the shit out of him and won. He was a sleazeball and judging by the many chins he had, it didn't shock me that he died at a kinda young age.

The moral of the story, I guess is that if you hear shitty music, somebody's going to jail.


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Bee-otch of the Day Archives can be seen on http://beeotchoftheday.blogspot.com!

Bee-otch of the Day is a production of Chuck69.com, Grand Rapids' site for Stern, politics and more!

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